


Pretend We're In Love (The Heartache Still Hurts)

by InsaneJuliann



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Fake/Pretend Relationship, Hurt Tony Stark, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Torture, M/M, Oblivious Rhodey, Pining, Terminal Illnesses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-25
Updated: 2016-02-08
Packaged: 2018-05-16 04:10:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 51,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5813572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsaneJuliann/pseuds/InsaneJuliann
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rhodey's dad is dying, and what he's always wanted is for Rhodey to be happily married. Tony and Rhodey were best friends, and haven't spoken in years. But after a chance meeting at the airport, and a desperate, insane idea on Rhodey's part, they end up pretending to be engaged.</p><p>But how much of it is really pretend?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [27dragons](https://archiveofourown.org/users/27dragons/gifts).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the (very long) story that I wrote for Liz, in exchange for a fake-engagement AU for myself, too. The prompt I chose was "I hate commitment but my dad’s dying wish is to see me get married and you’re an old family friend I ran into at the airport on my way to visit him so hey let’s get engaged."
> 
> I keep apologizing for how long it turned out, and she keeps insisting that this is not something to apologize about.
> 
> BIG big thanks to potrix and my friend MJ for being awesome sounding boards, listening to me complain about stubborn characters and how hard it was to decide between various plot points, and being super enthusiastic about this fic. It probably wouldn't be half as good (or nearly as finished) as it is without them.

Rhodey was determined to find a relatively secluded area to plop his ass during his seven hour layover.

It was his third flight – his last one, thankfully – and then he’d be home, which wasn’t as great as it’d normally be, but he had to be there.

Five months. They’d given his dad five months, as an _outside_ guess.

His mama’s voice had broken over the phone when she’d told him.

He found a mostly deserted area of the airport near his gat. Just one other person was curled up small into one of the uncomfortable seats, hugging a beat-up backpack, hood pulled low over their face, mouth a bit slack in sleep. Rhodey settled down in the corner, on the floor, and let out a slow breath.

He’d spoken to his dad before starting this hellish series of flights. Dad had asked if he was bringing anyone with him, and it wasn’t the first time Rhodey had been pointedly asked that question, but it was the first time it’d genuinely hurt Rhodey to not be able to say ‘yes’.

It wasn’t like Rhodey hadn’t brought people home before. Just… he’d never quite found someone he loved enough to go that one step that would fulfill his dad’s wish of seeing Rhodey married. The closest Rhodey had gotten had ended in disaster.

Admittedly, he hadn’t tried very hard after that with the long-term relationship thing. He couldn’t see much point.

A couple hours later, he heard a small commotion. Rhodey peeled his eyes open to check what was happening. The other person was moving, back hunched and hood low over their face, walking away from what looked like security and either a reporter or some rabidly excited man with a cell phone out and straining to get either a picture or video.

“Mr. Stark, over here!”

Rhodey blinked, mind a bit blank with disbelief of the odds, and tried to get a better look at the person. He couldn’t see much of their face still, except the facial hair – which was distinctive, now that he was actually focusing on him. Rhodey’s eyes dropped to the hand wrapped around the strap of the backpack, searching along the thumb and… there. The shine of an old – familiar – burn scar.

“Tony?” he asked.

Freezing, hand spasming over the strap, he glanced up slowly, suspiciously. It was Tony, though he looked older, exhausted and ragged. The eyes were almost the same – still a bright, warm amber brown, though they lacked the mischief and laughter Rhodey always remembered in them. It’d been a few years since they’d both graduated from MIT, since they last saw each other a few months after that, but… surely Tony hadn’t changed so fundamentally.

Slowly, Tony looked over Rhodey, from his head to his feet and back up, taking in everything – the way Rhodey was dressed, his pack, not missing a single damned detail probably.

“Rhodes?”

“Hey man,” Rhodey said, grinning. “Long time no see. How’ve you been?”

Tony gave him a bit of a disbelieving look, then scoffed and shook his head. “How do you think?” He grinned a bit, though it wasn’t a pleasant or happy one. Rhodey felt a moment of hurt that maybe Tony wasn’t glad to see him.

“Right.” He shook his head. It’d been years, and after all, Tony had stopped talking to him for a reason - even if Rhodey didn’t know what it was. “Well it was nice-“

“How’ve you been?” Tony asked, interrupting him – and that was familiar enough to make

Rhodey laugh slightly as Tony fell to the ground to take a seat on the wall next to him, stretching his legs out in front of him and crossing them at the ankles. “You still enlisted?”

“Yeah,” Rhodey said.

“Heading out, or back?”

Rhodey swallowed, feeling his throat stick, and croaked, “Uh, home. I… got leave to….”

Tony peered at him curiously, eyes almost back to how Rhodey remembered. Curious, not dark and suspicious. “What’s up buttercup?”

It made Rhodey smile, huff another small laugh even if that felt like the last thing he wanted to do. He swallowed, leaning his head back against the wall and closing his eyes.

He couldn’t make himself say exactly what the situation was – couldn’t even bring himself to think it. The closest he could get was, “Dad’s got five months.”

Tony was quiet for a minute. “Shit, Rhodey. That’s awful.”

Rhodey nodded and swallowed again, throat tight, fighting back the tickle in his eyes. When he had it back under control, he tilted his head to see Tony. “What are you up to?”

“Eh,” Tony said with a shrug, eying him speculatively. Turning to face Rhodey more fully, he shot him a sly kind of grin. “I’m on vacation.”

“Where you going?”

“No idea,” Tony said, bright and cheerful. It made Rhodey laugh, which had Tony’s grin widening until the corners of his eyes scrunched. They had that mischievous laughter back in them and it was oddly reassuring to see. “I’ve just been waiting for a strike of inspiration or something.”

“Flying by the seat of your pants?” Not that it’d surprise Rhodey. There were too many instances to recall of Tony winging things last minute, making it up as he went along, and usually dragging whoever was around along for the ride. Some of those memories were ones that kept Rhodey going when shit got too real.

“Keeps things interesting,” Tony said with a light shrug, little smile of satisfaction on his face.

“You could always do that… what did we call it? Epic Spring Break marathon or something?” Rhodey suggested.

Tony gave a soft huff, smirking a little. He dropped his head back against the wall, staring out over the seats. “I’ve actually been to all three places now. Great, but not quite what I’m, uh, looking for right now.”

Interesting.

“What are you looking for?” Rhodey asked, curious. As he watched, the smirk slipped away and Tony’s brows furrowed. He tilted his head and stared at the floor near his feet. Rhodey caught sight of Tony’s finger rubbing light circles around the knuckle of his thumb, one of the small signs of self-comfort Tony had that Rhodey had picked up back in college.

“Dunno,” Tony said with a forced little grin, turning his head towards Rhodey but not actually looking at him. “Something different. Some actual quiet for once, maybe.”

“You could come with me,” Rhodey found himself offering, just like he had that first Thanksgiving he’d known Tony, when he’d found out that Tony had been planning on spending it on campus because his parents were going somewhere and he’d only be in the house with the cook for company.

Just like then, Tony was now staring at him, skeptical.

“Honestly, man, you’d be doing me a favor,” Rhodey added. “I could… I could use the company.”

Tony still didn’t look convinced, eyeing Rhodey with something achingly close to suspicion. He climbed to his feet after a long time looking at him, shaking his head. “You better not cry all over me, Rhodes.”

Rhodey shook his head with a soft laugh. “Yeah, yeah. Promise not to get any emotions on you.”

“Good.” Tony hitched his backpack strap more comfortably over his shoulder. “Not even your mom’s cooking is good enough if that’s going to be part of the deal.”

Rhodey got to his feet and followed Tony to go buy a ticket for Rhodey’s plane. “You haven’t tasted the new pie she found a recipe for a few years ago.”

Tony groaned, complaining loudly about how Rhodey’s mom was going to try to plump Tony up like the last time he’d visited, beginning a rambling tirade about how he was sure it was the plot of some kid’s story a nanny had read to him once. Rhodey just walked alongside him and let it wash over him.

~*~*~

“Hey, Mama,” Rhodey said, opening his arms and letting his mother wrap him up tightly, rocking them side to side. He closed his eyes, ducking his head down against her hair. It smelled like coconut – probably a new shampoo.

“I’m glad you’re here, Jim,” she said with a small smile, a little teary. She gave his cheek a pat. “It’s good to have you home. I put fresh… Tony Stark, is that you I see hiding back there?” she demanded, eyes locking over Rhodey’s shoulder.

Tony shuffled into sight, grinning a bit sheepishly. So different to the guy that’d been on the plane and in the car with Rhodey the past day, brash and cocky and telling Rhodey so many unwanted details about the shit he got up to as a high society bachelor since they’d last spoken.

Rhodey had tried not to judge Tony too harshly for dropping him like he had, to apparently drink and party and smooze other rich folks. Tried not to feel hurt and jump to conclusions about why - such as Rhodey not fitting in with those kinds of people, not being considered good enough. (He reminded himself of Tony back in the first year they’d known each other, curled up in Rhodey’s bed after some SI thing his parents had dragged him to. The quiet admission that he’d be happy to never go to one again.)

“Hey Mrs. Rhodes.”

“You know I’d rather you call me Roberta, dear, now come here,” she said, walking around Rhodey and reaching for Tony. She pulled him in for a hug, Tony tensing a bit at first before he sighed and leaned into it. Rhodey had forgotten how Tony always just melted into his mom’s hugs. Hell, into any kind of affection Rhodey’s family gave him.

“My, you’ve gotten big,” she said quietly, stepping back and cupping Tony’s face in her hands.

Tony shrugged. “Been a while,” he mumbled.

Roberta hummed, eyeing him. “Still too skinny,” she stated and then turned to Rhodey accusingly. “You didn’t tell me you were bringing someone with you, let alone _Tony._ Your sister has already claimed the guest room for her kids and no way are we putting anyone on that ratty old couch.”

“I can just,” Tony started to say, gesturing over his shoulder vaguely, only to snap his mouth shut at the look he got.

“Jim,” his mom said, not shifting her stern stare from Tony. “Go ahead and take Tony’s things with you up to your room. I’m gonna steal him for help getting dinner started for everyone and we’ll figure out rooming arrangements later.” Finally she looked over at Rhodey. “Visiting hours end soon, if you want to go visit your father today.”

Rhodey nodded, reaching out for Tony’s bag, which was reluctantly handed over. His mama pursed her lips at it, but didn’t say anything, just reached over to link an arm through Tony’s and pull him after her.

Grinning at the ‘help me’ look Tony shot back at him, Rhodey jogged up the stairs to drop his and Tony’s bags to the floor near his closet. He spared a moment, taking some deep breaths to steady his hands.

Then, he straightened and went back down, walking past the kitchen without a second look, and got in the car to go see his dad.

~*~*~

Tony watched Rhodey walk past the kitchen with a straight back and shoulders, jaw obviously clenched and expression steeled. He startled a bit when Mrs. Rhodes – Roberta – touched his shoulder.

“I’m glad you’re here, Tony,” she said. It was painfully sincere and made Tony’s stomach clench with discomfort.

He looked back down at the dough she was having him knead for her. “Didn’t mean to just drop in. I’m sure you’ve got enough on your plate with family being in your house and-“

She tsked at him admonishingly. “I’ve told you, honey, you’re as good as.” She glanced at him from the corners of her eyes as she mixed a bowl of chocolate pudding. “You’re always welcome here.”

Tony gave a nod, wondered if she was as oblivious to what his life had been like lately as Rhodey was. Probably. There’d be little reason for the Rhodes family to care about the drama of the corporate world, let alone the Starks.

And after he’d cut communication with them all pretty firmly back in that first year after MIT, he wouldn’t have blamed them for hating him. They’d made him welcome for almost every fall and spring break, for a good deal of holidays, once for almost an entire summer. Tony’d weaseled his way into their home only to drop them without warning. He’d changed his phone number, ignored the few letters or emails (well, okay, he’d not ignored them; he’d read them and never replied), and eventually they’d stopped trying.

It’d been for the best, Tony had thought. Now, he was having a hard time convincing himself of that.

There was nothing about the silence that was uncomfortable, but Tony didn’t like how it settled and stretched. He licked his lips and cast about for a safe topic – nothing to do with Terrence, or Rhodey if Tony could help it – and remembered what she’d said about the guest room being taken.

“Jeanette has kids now?” he asked.

Roberta smiled over at him, stepping over to nudge him out of the way. She started working the dough flat. “Yes. Lila and Ben.”

Tony nodded. He knew how to do small talk, especially about kids or grandkids. “How old?”

“Four and two. Lila starts preschool this year; she’s very excited.”

Smiling a bit, Tony opened the oven when she tilted her head towards it, silently asking. She stuck the pie crust she’d crafted in there, dusted her hands off on a dish towel and led the way out of the kitchen. She grabbed her phone off the counter – an old StarkPhone, one that was actually one of Tony’s first designs when he started working in R&D.

His dad had to be pressured by Obie to actually accept it and put the phones into production.  
Roberta showed him pictures of two kids – a girl with dark brown hair and a little boy with skin a few shades lighter and surprisingly blue eyes. He complimented the pictures appropriately, listening to the anecdotes Roberta shared, and resisted the urge to ask if he could take apart her phone and get it working faster.

“How’ve you been, Tony? Anyone in your life?” she asked.

Tony fought back the blush. Why he always ended up blushing and stammering around her, he didn’t know. He could keep a cool, charming mask up around everyone else – his parents, the media, SI board members, Rhodey – but put him in front of Roberta Rhodes and it blew away like dust in the wind. It was patently unfair. Especially since she asked these kinds of questions, and he couldn’t just give her an honest answer.

“Uh, no,” he said, looking away. “No one important.”

“Too bad,” she said softly. “I thought I’d heard something about a young lady… Pott?”

“Potts,” Tony corrected, then added, “Pepper. Yeah, no, she’s… we’re not an item. She, uh, she’s my PA. Helps keep me on time for deadlines and meetings, stuff like that.”

“Oh.”

He didn’t understand why Roberta sounded so sad. Pepper was amazing, but she wasn’t interested in a relationship with Tony. To be fair, Tony was over his crush on Pepper - even over the disappointment of losing any romantic interest in her. And they were good friends, which, hey, maybe Roberta would like to hear that.

“She’s my best friend.” He smiled at her, shrugging. “Shoulder to cry on, kicks me into gear when I need a good kick. I love her, but not… not romantically.”

Roberta smiled and put her hand on his cheek. It was warm and wrinkled and he could faintly smell some kind of perfume from her wrist. “I’m glad you’ve had a good friend to look out for you then.”

He smiled helplessly. He’d forgotten how much Roberta had always cared, how warm and compassionate and….

Since the first time Rhodey brought Tony for Thanksgiving and Roberta had welcomed him with the same hug she’d given Rhodey, since that first visit when Roberta had treated him so warmly and lovingly, Tony had secretly thought that he’d wished he had a mom like that.

Maria loved him, in her way. Tony understood that now, but she couldn’t love him like he wanted. She was too interested in her charity work, too interested in project after project, picking one up to start it, only to drop it in the hands of other people to continue as she went on to the next thing. Tony sometimes thought – possibly uncharitably – that he’d only been another project for her in the long string of them, left for the nannies to continue with when she’d gotten bored.

He tried to think of the last time he’d seen her. It might have been… seven months ago? The charity gala for veterans, hosted at the Stark Mansion. She’d smiled at him the same she had every single other person that night.

Tony swallowed and stepped back.

There’d been more than one reason he hadn’t visited the Rhodes family once he’d graduated. He had to remember that he hadn’t just been being selfish when he cut them from his life.

Roberta - as well as the others, but mostly Roberta who cared about Tony more than he deserved - he would let her down one day. He’d disappoint her, all of them. If he wasn’t careful, he could ruin this happy family. He would have if he’d stayed then, and maybe things were different _now_ , but eventually it’d happen again, and he’d be back to before, and….

“Tony?”

“Anything else you needed help with?” Tony asked, looking back to the kitchen to avoid her gaze.

Roberta nodded slowly. Tony wondered what she was thinking, if she was regretting letting him in her home so many years later after all, then shoved it all away again.

“Sure. You can chop up some potatoes for me.”

~*~*~

Seeing him, despite expecting it, was like a kick to the gut. There was medical equipment, and the oppressive quiet weight of the hospital, and his dad had lost _so much_ weight, looking nothing like the big man Rhodey had grown up with. His smile when he saw Rhodey was weak, almost tremulous.

Rhodey fought back the panic that slammed into him.

“Hey Dad,” he said quietly.

“Jim.” His voice was thin and cracked. Rhodey had expected that, had been hearing it over the phone for a while now, but it hit all the harder when coming with the sight of his dad. He looked and sounded so different. So… sick.

“Glad you could visit, son.”

“Wouldn’t rather be anywhere else,” Rhodey said, coming to sit in the chair beside the bed.

“Mama said Jeanie was here already with the kids? Alex too?”

“No,” he dad said, pausing to take a few breaths. “He had a… business trip, I think.” Another pause, more breathing. “Will be here when it ends, though.”

Rhodey nodded.

He’d never had trouble talking to his dad before, but he felt it in that moment. He wanted to avoid the obvious, which only made it harder to ignore. Rhodey cast his gaze around the long-term room, the silent TV in a corner of the wall playing some old cop show, the nurses’ schedule written on a whiteboard on the wall, along with patient information.

His dad looked so tired.

“Jim,” his dad said, reaching out and grasping Rhodey’s hand. His grip was weaker than Rhodey had ever imagined it could be. His skin felt so fucking thin, startlingly soft though.

Rhodey looked up at his dad.

He smiled at Rhodey.

“How were your flights? On base in California, right?”

“Yeah,” Rhodey agreed, nodding. “Weather was shit there.”

His dad laughed, an almost soundless, whisper of a laugh. His dad’s laugh had always been loud and carrying, contagious. Now it made Rhodey blink rapidly and swallow.

“Flights go okay? I know you had that long layover.”

Rhodey nodded, leaning back in his chair a bit. “Yeah, we hit a bit of turbulence on the last one but nothing I’m not used to. Been through worse.”

“I’d bet,” Dad said with another hoarse laugh. “Did you rent a car or catch a cab?”

“I was going to just get a cab but…” He paused, shrugged. “Traffic sucked, by the way. I forget that every time and then I’m reminded all over again how much I hate the city traffic.”

“Jeanie said the same thing,” his dad said, pausing for another breath, “when she got here.”

Rhodey hummed. “She has road rage.”

“My temper,” his dad said with a grin. It wasn’t the same as Rhodey remembered – or maybe it was and this place, this situation, was tainting everything. “Good thing… she has Alex. He… balances her.”

“Dad,” Rhodey said only to stop, not sure what he wanted to say. He hated the sad way his dad was looking at him, hated that it was there because of him.

Smiling sadly, his dad lightly squeezed his hand again, a weak pressure that hardly lasted for a few seconds. “I know you’re not ready to commit to that kind of relationship yet,” his dad reassured Rhodey. “I don’t mean to push you. I just don’t like seeing you alone so much.”

“Actually,” Rhodey said, feeling like his mouth was forming words while his brain just watched in shock as he continued, “Tony’s with me.”

His dad blinked, surprised. “Tony? From MIT, Tony? I didn’t know he got back in touch with you.”

“Yeah. We, uh….”

What was he doing? Oh god, he was going to….

“We’re engaged.”

“You’re… really?” His dad tried to sit up, frowning, and Rhodey stood to softly push him back down when his dad’s face twisted with pain. He coughed a bit, reaching out for the small cup of water on the tray on the other side of the bed and sipping it, hand trembling a little when he set it back down. Then he pinned Rhodey with an odd look. “You said… you weren’t bringing… anyone,” he accused through pants for breath.

“I… wasn’t going to. But… well. I changed my mind. It’s, we just got engaged, and I changed my mind.”

“You’re… you’re engaged.” His dad shook his head. “Really?”

Rhodey nodded, swallowing thickly when his dad grinned at him, looking hopeful and happy.

“Tony, huh,” his dad mused. He chuckled, leaning back and grinning wider. “You’re gonna have your hands full with that one, Jim.”

~*~*~

“Hey, Mama, gotta steal Tony for a sec.” Rhodey grabbed Tony’s arm, ignoring the indignant squawk, and tugged him outside to the backyard, around to the side of the house with the garage, far from his mama’s kitchen and sharp ears.

“I need… a huge favor, man.”

Tony frowned, head tilting. “More of a favor than letting you get emotions all over me?” he asked slowly.

Rhodey grimaced. “So I mighta told my dad I was engaged.”

“Oh no,” Tony said, eyes going wide and taking a step backwards. “Oh _hell_ no, Rhodey! You can’t seriously-“

“To you,” Rhodey insisted. “I told him we were engaged.”

“Rhodey,” Tony whined. “Rhodey no! You can’t – that’s just such a bad idea, why did you _do that?”_

“Tony man, you don’t get it. He’s been wanting me to get married for… for years now. It’s the one damn thing he’s always wanted to see happen for me, and he’s only got - and I….” His voice cracked and he trailed off, digging the heels of his palms into his burning eyes.

He heard Tony mutter “shit” and then Tony’s hand was on his shoulder. “You… you owe me so _fucking_ much for this, Rhodes.”

He nodded, swallowing, and scrubbing his hands over his face.

Tony snorted, muttering under his breath. “You’re telling your mom,” he said with a sharp look, pointing suddenly at Rhodey. “And you had better make me sound like a fucking awesome boyfriend.”

“Yeah, Tones.”

“I’m the fucking light of your damn life,” he continued.

A smile twitched across his face. “Sure, Tones.”

“Hey. Sass is not appreciated here.”

“We gotta… work out details. A story, so we’re both….” Rhodey cleared his throat, grabbing the bottom of his t-shirt and rubbing it over his face, clearing away the last of the moisture around his eyes.

Tony sighed, eyes staring away, shoulders slumped. “Yeah, alright. Your mom said she needed some things for dinner – I’ll offer to run to the store, take you with me so I don’t get lost or whatever. If we’re lucky, your parents won’t talk before we get back, so we won’t get ratted out tonight.” He eyed Rhodey. “You sure you’re okay lying to your family about this?”

“Yes.” Rhodey noticed Tony’s skeptical look and shrugged. “Look, I don’t like it, but I am okay doing it. We can just break up after Dad’s-.” Rhodey’s throat closed around the words. He had to swallow twice before he could add, “I’ll even tell everyone it was me, okay. I freaked out about it and broke it off.”

Tony snorted, turning and trudging towards the back door. “Yeah, sure. Make me sound like the damn broken-hearted heroine of the fucking romantic tragedy.”

Rhodey caught up with him and slung an arm around his shoulder. “You can be the one that proposed.”

“That makes it worse,” Tony grumbled, only to add, “It’d be a damned fucking romantic proposal – the kind to put tears in your sister’s eyes.”

“Man, I remember college – you wouldn’t know romance if it spit in your eye.”

“You’re an awful fiancé,” Tony stated with a bright grin. “No wonder I dumped you.”

Rhodey laughed.

~*~*~

Tony drummed his fingers on the steering wheel of their rental, cutting a glance at Rhodey.

Fucking _Rhodey._

What was Tony’s life, really. It was a disaster, that’s what it was, and even when he thought maybe something at least okay was about to happen - like visiting people he genuinely liked and that had always seemed to not hate him, maybe letting himself dare to have the Rhodes family in his life again (at least for a while, maybe peripherally after?) - that turned into a disaster too.

Fucking Rhodey.

“You’re seriously going to lie to your family about this?” Tony asked again. He lied to his parents all the time, but then, he wasn’t sure that they counted as a family, not in the way the Rhodeses were. Roberta told Tony he was family, which meant she _trusted_ him, and now he was helping Rhodey lie to her.

Tony’s stomach felt like it swooped into his feet, leaving him sick and awful feeling. All afternoon Roberta had been making Tony feel like he was family, just like she had all through his years at MIT with Rhodey, and she’d told him that it was good to have him back, that she’d missed him… and already Tony was doing something that would, if she found out, hurt her. Hurt all of them.

“I already told my dad,” Rhodey pointed out, all… reasonable, like this wasn’t a _disaster._ Of course, for Rhodey, it probably wasn’t.

He’d still have his family at the end of their fake-engagement break-up. Tony… wouldn’t. Probably would never have them again. There was no way that Tony could see where he’d be welcomed back after breaking off an engagement to Rhodey. He remembered how they’d begged Tony to talk to Rhodey, told him in emails and even a letter all about why Rhodey needed a friend in his life a few months after he’d cut contact.

Tony hadn’t, hadn’t talked to Rhodey or replied to any of them. Maybe the reason he’d decided to cut ties had no longer been valid, but the reasons he should stay away had been the same.

Of course, here he was years later, back with the Rhodes. All because he’d been unable to leave Rhodey sitting on the floor of the damned airport by himself looking sad, been unable to say no when Rhodey said he needed the company for the trip home, been unable to stop from thinking he could have it all back just like before.

Fucking disaster, Tony’s luck was the _worst._

“Why didn’t you just make up some fictional… person,” Tony complained. “Why’d you have to say it was _me?”_ Why’d he have to put Tony in this position, make it so Tony was going to lose this tiny little good thing he’d just been thinking maybe he could figure out a way to keep. Roberta Rhodes hadn’t stopped talking about how she expected him to visit more often. She’d take it back when this was all over, Tony knew. And in some ways, that was the least of the problems with Tony agreeing to this.

“Making someone up wouldn’t work – they’d all want to meet them,” Rhodey argued. “I’d definitely get caught out in that lie, and besides. You’re here.” Rhodey shrugged, then gave Tony another look. For a moment, he was contemplative, then grimaced and looked resigned.

“…Listen, if you’re not comfortable with-“

“Shut up,” Tony snapped.

 _Fucking_ Rhodey.

Of course, the asshole didn’t listen.

“Tony, if you’re not comfortable with this, it’s alright. We can think of something – I’m not going to force you to pretend to love me, to do this for me.”

“Just shut up, Rhodes,” Tony grumbled, something in his chest twisting painfully. “I said I’d do it, didn’t I? Just… shut up.”

“You’re upset,” Rhodey stated. “Tony, look, never mind about-“

“Damn it, Rhodey, I’m fine!” Tony snapped loudly, glaring at him for a moment before focusing on the road again. There was tense silence for a minute. Tony flexed his hands on the wheel and blew out a breath loudly. “I’m fine,” he repeated, this time sounding it. “Guess I don’t like the idea of getting caught by your mom though.”

That wasn’t even half of the truth of it, but close enough. She would be furious if she caught them.

She’d be furious for Tony ‘breaking’ Rhodey’s heart when they broke up.

The rest of the truth… well, Tony’d been keeping the rest of it to himself for long enough that he wasn’t about to slip now.

It was ridiculous anyway. He’d get over it. Someday.

Until then, he’d keep telling himself that, and pray that someday would be soon.

Besides, if they admitted Rhodey had lied, things would be awkward enough that Tony would just have to leave anyway. And he didn’t… right now, he didn’t have anywhere to go, damn it. And he didn’t _want_ to have to go yet. No, this was the best option. A way to pay Rhodey back, for all the times he’d pulled Tony’s ass out of the fire back in college.

This would just, Tony would consider it as a blanket payback, making things all fair and even between them. It’d cover all the times Rhodey had pulled Tony’s drunken ass out of uncomfortable situations at parties in college, the times Rhodey had let Tony hide out in his dorm because someone was being clingy in Tony’s apartment, or his Dad had just dropped by for a surprise ‘visit’.

Hell, Tony would consider this a big enough favor to make up for the fact that last time Rhodey had needed Tony, Tony hadn’t been there. There was probably something ironic in there, Tony pretending to be engaged to Rhodey to help make up for the fact that he wasn’t there when Rhodey’s practically fiancé dumped him.

Tony was good at pretending. He just… wouldn’t exactly be pretending in the way Rhodey would be.

_Fucking Rhodey._

They pulled into the crowded parking lot of some chain grocery store.

Besides, Tony had been kidding himself that he could actually keep the Rhodes family in his life after this vacation of his. The world Tony lived in… it only hurt people like them. He wasn’t good for them, it was better this way. He could have them for a while longer, and then have a reason to stay away.

Maybe if he repeated that enough, it’d stop hurting.

~*~*~

Rhodey pushed the cart as Tony trailed behind him, hands in the pockets of his over-large hoodie and a beanie pulled over the top of his head. Rhodey had forgotten how Tony could blend in like that, change how he looked with just a few items of clothing, a shift in the way he walked, and bam – different guy.

“How’d we meet up again?” Tony asked, snatching the cheap brand of chocolate chips out of Rhodey’s hand and throwing in the expensive ones.

Rhodey glared at him and switched them again. “Those ones taste like shit.” He ignored Tony’s dramatic eye roll. “I don’t know – at the airport? Keep it close to the truth, that’s easier to remember.”

“Alright,” Tony mused. “So you were heading out or whatever, I was heading for a business convention, we intercepted and exchanged info.” He chewed his lip. “So we did the long distance thing.” His nose twitched. “Tough.”

Rhodey felt a surge of old anger at that, though it wasn’t at all Tony’s fault for touching a sore spot. It’d been after Tony stopped talking with any of them, he hadn’t been around for that bullshit. Rhodey wasn’t sure if Tony knew about it now or not, but… well, Tony wasn’t the most tactful person. It was possible he did know and had said it anyway.

He breathed through it until the anger faded back once more. “It can work if both partners actually put effort into it.” Shrugging, he pointed out, “Besides, we’re both busy guys. Not like we’re in one place – or even reachable – all that regularly.”

Tony nodded, eyes drifting. “How long were we… dating?”

Sighing, Rhodey threw the pancake mix his mama preferred into the cart. “If we say it’s too long, my parents are going to call foul. I probably would have told them.”

“I didn’t want you to.”

When Rhodey looked at him, Tony shrugged, eyes roaming the shelves.

“I’m not out. Wasn’t comfortable with it.”

“You’re still not out?” Rhodey asked, surprised. Tony shot him a look, anger and discomfort plain in the deep furrow between his brows, the pinched corners of his mouth.

“Dad’s made it clear plenty of times just what he thinks about… all of that,” Tony said with a sniff, waving his hand lazily. He went back to looking around the shelves with such perfected boredom Rhodey might have bought it, if it wasn’t for what they were talking about. “Figured it’d be smarter to just keep it to myself for a while longer.”

Rhodey rolled around a few different responses, before deciding not to touch any of that with a ten foot pole.

“So we kept it quiet,” Rhodey said. “And you prop-“

“You proposed,” Tony said quietly. “And I said yes.” He wasn’t looking at Rhodey, but Rhodey was staring at him, at the little quirk of his lips as he walked alongside the cart. “Not like Dad can do much about it once we’re actually married.”

It was a little odd hearing Tony talk like this was… real, was happening. But, Rhodey got it. They had to talk like that, think like that. Act it, too, Rhodey realized. His stomach twisted with unexpected nerves.

“He could fire you,” Rhodey pointed out to Tony, instead of thinking about the reality of what he was doing. He just had to get through it all, to get out on the other side of this and it’d be fine.

Tony snorted, scowling. “No he can’t. He thinks he can, but he really can’t. I’m the one supplying most of the new ideas for projects, fixing the stupid mistakes he’s been making for the past two years, and the Board knows it. They won’t let him actually go through with firing me.”

“Okay,” Rhodey said. “So I proposed. Even though I’ve been very against getting married for years now.”

Tony shrugged, glancing at him and away. “Death makes people respond intensely and unexpectedly.”

Hands tightening around the cart handle, Rhodey bit back his first response – that his dad wasn’t gone _yet_ damn it – and gave a tight nod.

“Besides,” Tony said, shooting Rhodey a teasing look. “Didn’t you say I wouldn’t know romance if it spit in my eye?”

Snorting, Rhodey shook his head and slapped a hand to Tony’s back. “It’s true.”

~*~*~

Jeanette’s kids ambushed Rhodey as he walked through the door carrying two bags of groceries. Tony snickered and slipped by with his measly single bag, heading for the kitchen.

“Hey Ben, Lila. Mind letting me-“

“Mommy said you’s in trouble,” Lila whispered – loudly.

Ben nodded frantically, thumb in his mouth.

“Oh?” Rhodey felt his stomach drop. They couldn’t have found out about what he’d told Dad yet.

Lila nodded with all the wisdom of a four year old possessed. “She saids you’s a sneak.”

“Oh.” Rhodey grimaced. Apparently they had. “Alright, let go, I need to take these to the kitchen.”

Lila sighed and let go of his leg, tugging Ben along when he continued to cling, looking up at Rhodey with dark blue eyes. Rhodey continued down the hall, stepping into the kitchen only to freeze.

“Oh no you don’t, Jim,” he mama said, grabbing his arm before he could bolt and pulling him in further. Jeanette grinned wickedly at him, taking the grocery bags and setting them aside. Rhodey was pushed into a seat at the table next to Tony, who glanced at him. He actually looked nervous, almost uneasy, and Rhodey remembered what he’d said about not wanting Rhodey’s mom to find out about their little… charade.

Or maybe he was playing the part of two men caught being ‘secretly’ engaged.

Rhodey smiled at him and Tony took a deep breath before turning a brilliant, charming grin on Rhodey’s mama and sister.

“Uh… surprise?”

“Tony Stark,” Roberta said, swatting his shoulder lightly with her hand. “This isn’t a situation you-“

“When the hell did this even _happen?”_ Jeanette interrupted, eying both of them with obvious confusion. “You two haven’t seen each other since, what, a bit after graduating?”

“No, you all haven’t seen him since graduation,” Rhodey said.

“We bumped into each other in an airport,” Tony explained. “Kept in touch after.”

“More than in touch, apparently,” Jeanette said, smirking suggestively.

“Jeanie,” Rhodey groaned.

“You never said anything about dating Tony!” his mama protested. “Then you show up here with him and tell your father that the two of you are getting married!”

“Look, I-“

“That’d be, uh, my fault,” Tony said, looking down when Jeanette and Rhodey’s mom pinned him with interested looks. “I’m not… I _wasn’t_ , uh… my parents don’t know, and I uh…. I asked if he’d not. Not tell anyone. Sorry.”

Roberta reached out and took Tony’s hand, squeezing it. “You know we don’t care, Tony. And we’d keep it quiet if you asked.”

“Yeah,” Tony murmured. “I know. But… I just, I wasn’t…. and it was just easier to keep it a secret. Less people that know, less chance that it’d _slip_ somehow.” He grimaced. “I’m sorry, that sounds bad, I just-“

“Hush,” she said. “You’re fine.”

Jeanette had her arms crossed and was staring at Rhodey oddly. “You weren’t going to be bringing anyone in the first place. Why the change?”

“I proposed, a few days after I talked to Dad,” Rhodey said firmly. “Kind of last minute, really. Didn’t plan on it, just… couldn’t help myself.” He glanced over at Tony and smiled. Tony gave a small smile back.

Keep playing the part, Rhodey told himself, facing his mom and sister again.

“Figured… well, couldn’t leave him behind after that. We were going to tell everyone tomorrow. Except, I kind of spilled the beans early.” He laughed and shook his head. “Sorry,” he added, directing it at Tony.

Tony shrugged, leaning back in his seat and still smiling. “It’s alright, Platypus.”

Rhodey groaned, even as his sister gave a delighted cackle and repeated ‘platypus’ to herself.

The subject was seemingly – thankfully – dropped. At least until his mama caught him sometime after dinner, pulling him aside. She gave Rhodey a searching look, brows furrowed and lips pursed a bit.

“Jim, baby… you’re not just marrying Tony because your dad is dying, are you?”

“What?” Rhodey asked, quickly adding, “No, of course not!”

She hummed shortly, frown deepening. “It just… seems rather coincidental, that this is happening now, without any kind of warning, and I know your dad has always-“

“Look, maybe… maybe that’s part of it, of getting engaged now, but Mama….”

“Don’t do this just because your dad wants to see all his babies happily married,” she insisted. “Tony doesn’t deserve that, and-“

“I’m not going to marry Tony just to make Dad happy,” Rhodey said.

And he wasn’t – wouldn’t. Pretending to be engaged was… close, but kept a definite line from it actually happening. It wasn’t permanent, wasn’t going to change anything in the long run.

“I’m not going to rush into marrying him either,” Rhodey reassured her. “We haven’t picked a date – we still have to tell his parents – it’s not going to happen b… any time soon,” he said quietly, tripping over the last few words. He hadn’t been able to say ‘before Dad’s gone’… couldn’t say it, yet. Could barely think it.

She still looked worried, but smiled at him and touched his cheek. “Okay. I just… had to check.”

Rhodey pulled her in for a hug, resting his cheek on top of her head. “I’m not going to marry Tony just because of Dad,” he promised her.

“Hey,” Jeanie said, appearing and giving them a quick once-over. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah,” his mom said, pulling back and wiping her cheeks quickly. “What do you need, sweetie?”

“Can’t find the pie plates,” she said after a moment. Mama walked over to show Jeanette where they were, Rhodey following behind them. Tony was hovering in the doorway, frowning a bit when he saw Rhodey.

“You okay?” he whispered when Rhodey stopped next to him. Ben was clinging to Tony’s leg, practically sitting on his foot.

“Fine,” Rhodey said, clearing his throat after to chase away the hoarseness.

Tony’s lips pressed together and he, slowly, reached out to take Rhodey’s hand, squeezing it. Rhodey smiled and squeezed back – catching Jeanette watching them from the corner of his eye.

“Out of the doorway, boys,” Roberta said, picking up the serving tray with a few plates of pie. Rhodey turned, laughing when he saw that Tony wasn’t even bothered by Ben still clinging to his leg, just dragging it along as he led the way back to the living room.

“Ben,” Jeanette said. “Let go of Tony’s leg.”

Ben shook his head and clamped on tighter, frowning.

Tony grinned and patted the top of his head. “He’s fine, Jeanie.”

“He knows better,” she retorted.

Tony shrugged, unconcerned, and fell onto the couch. Ben immediately moved to climb into Tony’s lap. It resulted in a wince and hiss from Tony; Rhodey sat next to him, murmuring, “You’re spoiling him.”

Again, Tony just shrugged. “Yeah well, isn’t that what uncles are supposed to do?” he mumbled, not looking at him.

Rhodey squeezed his shoulder. “Yeah,” he said quietly.

~*~*~

This whole thing might end up being harder than Tony had expected.

Sitting in the living room, Ben in his lap and Rhodey right fucking next to him, warm and achingly familiar and there, Roberta and Jeanette talking and laughing. Turning to include Tony in conversation, genuinely wanting to talk to him and hear what he had to say. It was so painfully good.

It was plain painful, too. Tony always had little compulsions to touch Rhodey. He’d gotten good at ignoring them for the most part, except now he had to… act on them.

He thought about leaning into Rhodey’s side? Couples did that, so since they were a ‘couple’ Tony should do it. He wanted to grab Rhodey’s hand, feel those long, rough fingers between his own? Definitely something couples did. The only compulsion Tony hadn’t acted on was leaning that bare inch up and kissing Rhodey’s cheek.

Tony didn’t know if he could do that and still remember this wasn’t real. It was hard enough as it was, but kissing him… no. Besides, that might have sent Rhodey reacting, and give away the game. Rhodey had startled the slightest bit when Tony grabbed his hand, though thankfully Jeanette and Roberta hadn’t noticed, too distracted by Lila telling them about a movie everyone had already seen.

It was a relief when Jeanette declared bedtime for the kids. Tony gave it half an hour more before excusing himself and Rhodey, claiming jet lag and just plain exhaustion.

They said their goodnights and went upstairs, Rhodey’s hand warm on Tony’s mid back. It dropped as soon as the bedroom door closed behind them.

They stared at the bed.

No one had worried about room arrangements with the news that Rhodey and Tony were engaged. Why would they? Tony couldn’t say anything, neither could Rhodey. They’d shared beds before, of course, Tony had been sneaking into Rhodey’s dorm room, into Rhodey’s crappy dorm _bed_ since the first few months of meeting him. (It’d been safe, it’d been warm, it’d been so nice Tony hadn’t known how to articulate why he kept coming back, giving Rhodey outrageous reasons that ended with Rhodey cracking a grin, rolling his eyes or laughing.)

It was weird now.

“I can sleep-“ Tony muttered, shifting on his feet. Rhodey cut him off.

“No, you’re the one doing me a favor here, I can-“

“Really,” Tony interrupted, digging into his bag for the smaller one with his toothbrush and toothpaste and shit. He scowled, angry and not entirely sure why exactly. “I’ve slept on plenty of-“

“My mama raised me better than to let a guest sleep on the damned floor,” Rhodey snapped.

Tony straightened and turned, giving him a challenging look – the same infuriating one that had gotten them both into trouble back at MIT. “What are you doing to do about it?” He smirked when Rhodey just glared, eyes narrowing when Tony grabbed a little bundle of clothes and the travel bag, heading into the attached bath.

Rhodey changed into pajamas himself, a worn shirt that he swore somehow still smelled of the desert despite how often Rhodey had washed it, and a comfortable pair of cotton pajama pants. He was waiting when Tony stepped out of the bathroom, arms crossed.

Tony paused, a flicker of unease visible for a moment before he hit it away behind a lecherous look, dragging his eyes pointedly up and down Rhodey.

“That shirt makes it wonderfully apparent how good the military has been to you, Honeybear.”

Rhodey rolled his eyes, stepping past Tony into the bathroom. Tony licked his dry lips, glad that he had the reputation – well earned, to be honest – of being a huge flirt, but not a serious one. 

He didn’t mind that reputation really. Flirting was fun, and as long as it was understood not to be serious, was harmless. He was sure if Rhodey knew half the things Tony said to him weren’t exactly… well.

Tony used his reputation to his advantage. Rhodey didn’t know, and that was how things would stay.

By the time Rhodey came back out, Tony had lifted two blankets from the hall closet. No one had noticed him – Jeanette’s kids were asleep in their beds, and he could hear the others downstairs talking in low voices in the kitchen. Tony had also stolen one of the pillows from Rhodey’s bed and made himself a little place to sleep on the floor, out of the way near the closet. It wasn’t exactly comfortable, but he hadn’t done too bad.

“Tony,” Rhodey said warningly.

Pointedly, Tony yawned and rolled so his back was to Rhodey, making a big deal out of settling in, drawing a blanket up to his shoulders.

“Fine.” Rhodey walked up behind him, bending over just as Tony seemed to realize he was there, twisting to peer suspiciously at him.

“Don’t you-“ Tony broke off with a little yelp, struggling only for a moment before clutching at Rhodey’s shoulders as Rhodey lifted him up off the ground with a small grunt.

Tony stayed unnaturally still as Rhodey carried him the few feet to his bed and dropped him there. Rhodey smirked when he bounced a little, looking pleased with himself.

Tony licked his lips. “Well if you wanted me in your bed, Honeybear, all you had to do was-“

“I did ask,” Rhodey said dryly before Tony could finish. “You stubbornly insisted on the floor.”

Tony glared, propping himself up on his elbows. “I am not taking your bed.”

“Never stopped you before,” Rhodey retorted.

Sighing loudly, Tony wiggled over to the other side. “Fine. We’ll share then.” Rhodey only hesitated a moment, and Tony sent him a challenging look that instantly had Rhodey yanking the covers up and climbing in, giving Tony a sharp look.

“Besides,” Tony said. “Jeanie’s kids could burst in here without warning, right? That’s a thing kids do? We can’t have them babbling about how one of us is sleeping on the floor. Everyone will know it’s a lie, then.” He sighed, closing his eyes.

“Yeah,” Rhodey said, voice stiff. Tony felt a sudden longing for his college years, when he’d been allowed to crawl into Rhodey’s bed without the man keeping careful distance between them, so obviously, painfully stiff. He wondered why Rhodey hadn’t minded then, and suddenly did now.

“Don’t cuddle me,” Tony grumbled, twisting so his back was to Rhodey, so he didn’t have to see it anymore.

“Not planning on it.”

~*~*~

Rhodey woke when the door creaked open, tensing until the sounds of giggles reached him. He groaned into his pillow.

He felt little bodies climb up onto the foot of the bed, crawling up his legs – not that carefully, either, and kids had _damned_ bony knees. He was ready for it when little hands grabbed his back and shoulders and began to shake him.

“Wake up, Uncle Jim! It’s time for breakfas’!”

“Up, up!” Ben echoed.

Groaning loudly, Rhodey rolled onto his back, careful not to squish his niece and nephew. They giggled some more, Ben stretching out over Rhodey’s stomach, Lila grinning brightly.

“Gramma said to tells you is breakfas’ time!”

“Okay,” Rhodey said, yawning. He stretched out as Lila scrambled off the other side of the bed and then helped Ben back to the floor.

It took Rhodey a moment to remember that the other side of the bed shouldn’t be empty. Frowning, Rhodey checked the bathroom – empty – and made use of it before going downstairs. He checked the living room, but it just had Lila standing in front of the TV, watching some kid’s show about superheroes.

Tony was in the kitchen, with Jeanette and Rhodey’s mom. Ben was on Jeanie’s hip, leaning over to look at what Tony was mixing as Jeanette stirred some eggs one-handed.

“Uh,” Rhodey said blankly, staring.

His mama looked over, grinning brightly. “Morning sleepyhead,” she teased. “Would you mind setting the table for us?”

“…Sure,” he said, staring as Tony made… pancakes? “I didn’t know you cooked,” he said.

Both Jeanette and his mom stopped to look over at him.

Tony started to blush and shrugged. “Jarvis taught me a bit.” He glanced quickly at Rhodey’s mom and sister, then looked at Rhodey with a bright smile. “Learn something new about people every day, Sugarplum,” he said.

“Ain’t that the truth,” Jeanette snorted. “Be glad it’s that he can cook, Jimmy, and not that he sings loudly and off-key in the shower in the mornings.”

Tony laughed, glancing over at Jeanette. The conversation no longer focusing on him, Rhodey made his escape.

He was glad Tony had turned that little slip into a joke. Rhodey needed to be more careful – he couldn’t mess up just because he was tired, because he was sure that there would be a lot of long nights ahead.

If he slipped around his dad, betrayed the lack of the kind of intimate knowledge of each other that couples had… all of it would have been for nothing. It’d be worse than if he hadn’t pretended to be engaged in the first place. He couldn’t let that happen.

~*~*~

Tony couldn’t _really_ cook. He knew how to do some things, like pancakes - Ben latched onto him like a monkey once Tony agreed with him that all pancakes needed to have chocolate chips in them - and a few quick dishes. Spaghetti, pot roast, quick, easy things that Jarvis had taught Tony over the years.

Tony had a file on his laptop, with the pages of Jarvis’ recipes painstakingly, carefully photocopied.

It was nice to make breakfast with Jeanette and Roberta, though. It was a bit harder than usual with Ben latched onto him, and Lila somehow got underfoot at some point too, but… still nice. Tony wondered if all normal families were like this, or if the Rhodes were just _that_ amazing. There was no way for him to ask, so he didn’t.

It made him painfully miss Jarvis though. So much that Jeanette noticed, her hand resting against his shoulder as she asked if he was okay.

Tony smiled brightly. “Yeah, fine.”

Roberta was looking now, too, a worried little frown between her brows.

“You sure?” Jeanette pressed.

Tony swallowed, nodded. “Yep. Peachy keen here.” He was grateful to catch sight of Rhodey stepping back into the kitchen. “Sugarpie!” Tony walked over - well, limped, because Ben was again attached to Tony’s leg - and stuck the spatula into Rhodey’s hand. “Watch the pancakes for me, I’ll be back.”

He disentangled himself from Ben and jogged up the stairs and into Rhodey’s room. Tony dragged his hands through his hair, slumping back against the door. His heart felt like it was going to burst, his chest too tight, and his throat was tightening in that familiar precursor to tears. It’d been months and still….

“Fine, you’re fine, you’re _fine!”_ He yanked on his hair, growled, and pushed off the door, going to sit on the side of the bed where he’d slept. His phone was still on the small shelf where he’d left it.

There was a missed call, number unknown. Tony almost called it back, it might be the lawyer Obie had promised to have get in touch with Tony.

Or it could be a reporter somehow got ahold of the number again, and Tony didn’t think he was up to chancing that this morning. Months later and the damned people still couldn’t leave him alone about what had happened before, or what was happening now between him and Howard.

The lawyer could call back, or leave a message or something. Tony could ask Obie about it next time they talked. He just… wasn’t up for any of that right then.

“Tones?” Rhodey called, pushing the door open even as he rapped softly with his knuckles. He frowned at Tony as he shut the door and came over, sitting next to him.

Close, but not touching. It was hard to ignore the moments they were close without touching, after Tony had let himself touch already. It’d been one night only, most of it spent sleeping, it shouldn’t be this hard to go back….

Hard to stuff a genie back into a bottle, Jarvis used to say.

Tony closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“‘M fine,” he said.

“Yeah, if we’re going with your definition of it.” Rhodey looked at him, head tilted and brows furrowed and it was so genuinely concerned it hurt, too. “What-”

“Please,” Tony said desperately. “I don’t want to talk about it. I’m fine. It’s nothing. Just… please.”

For a moment, he thought Rhodey would push. That stubborn look came to his face, and Tony didn’t think he could deal with that, either, he’d do something horrible or say something awful to make Rhodey back off because Tony never could seem to help himself and….

Slowly, Rhodey nodded. “Alright. I’ll leave it - for now.”

Tony breathed out quietly in relief.

“Ben’s guarding the pancakes,” Rhodey told him, clapping a hand to his shoulder. “Mama’s made you coffee, which she wanted me to say as an excuse to come check on you.”

Smiling slightly, Tony said, “Your mom is amazing.”

“Yeah.” Rhodey squeezed Tony’s shoulder and got up, hand dropping away. Tony wanted nothing more than to have it back. To have Rhodey’s arm over his shoulder, pulling Tony in and holding him close and….

Nope, shutting down that pathetically sappy fantasy right then and there. Tony Stark did not need cuddling from someone to feel better. He didn’t.

Dropping his phone back on the shelf, Tony hopped to his feet and linked his arm with Rhodey’s, keeping a teasing grin on his face and tugging towards the door. “C’mon, I want my coffee, I’ve only had one cup this morning, I’m behind on my quota.”

Rhodey snorted and relaxed, letting Tony pull him along, arms still linked.

Tony shoved aside the feeling of shame for taking advantage of the situation, using it as an excuse to touch Rhodey as much as possible before he couldn’t anymore.

~*~*~

After breakfast, Roberta and Rhodey got ready and went to visit Terrence, leaving Tony behind with Jeanette and her kids. Ben was, once again, latched onto Tony, this time thankfully just by constantly wanting to hold his hand. Lila was preoccupied by her cartoons again, singing along to some song that Tony swore was going to get stuck in his head and torment him all day long.

Jeanette had her laptop out - doing some of the editing work she did - and Tony wondered if she’d become immune to the song.

He also wondered if she’d let him mess around with her laptop. He was almost positive he could make it faster. Maybe he couldn’t improve it as much as he could if he had access to a lab and could make new parts or whatever, but he could still make it better. It was like there was an itch in his fingers, a restlessness to be doing something, making or creating or improving.

Tony was restless, wanted to go back to working but he _couldn’t_ and it wasn’t fair.

Ben tugged at his hand, catching Tony’s attention. He clambered to his knees and stretched up towards Tony, so Tony leaned down a bit.

“Legos?” he whispered.

“Legos?” Tony repeated with a frown.

Jeanette glanced up. “Oh. He has a tub of kid legos in the guest room, he loves playing with them. I’ll go-”

“I can get them,” Tony said, getting to his feet. Ben didn’t let go of his hand, and Tony thought about twisting free before just sighing and picking the kid up. He was heavier than Tony expected and he grunted before doing as he’d seen Jeanette do, and settling Ben on his hip. “Let’s go, Benny boy.”

He set Ben down when they reached the guest room, so Ben could scuttle off to find the legos on his own. Tony had to think about how to best pick up both Ben and the bulky container of legos, but managed it. He did stop in Rhodey’s room on the way back downstairs, going over to the shelf with his phone and encouraging Ben to pick it up for him. Kid couldn’t break it, because Tony had designed it to be able to withstand Dum-E dropping it in the workshop, so he wasn’t worried.

They made it back down the stairs without Tony dropping the kid or the legos, and his phone only got a little sticky from Ben’s fingers, so all in all definitely a win-win. Tony put Ben down first, then the legos, plucking his phone from Ben’s distracted hands and falling back onto the couch.

Ben looked up at him and frowned, walking over and grabbing onto Tony’s jeans.

“Pway?” he asked, all cute and shy and Tony did not know how to deal with _that_ either.

But Ben looked so hopeful and he just wanted Tony to sit on the floor and play with him, it wasn’t like Tony was _doing_ anything, so Tony set his phone on the coffee table and slid to the floor.

Ben didn’t really do much with the legos. He banged them on the floor some, and pressed pieces together without any kind of pattern or reason. Sometimes he’d pass Tony pieces, and Tony would stick them together and pass them back, which made Ben seem pretty happy.

Of course, they were _legos_ and Tony couldn’t help but think of something he could build with them. They were large and didn’t have as many options for sizes and shapes as the legos for older kids, but hey, he could still work with them. He began making a little building for Ben, taking whatever pieces Ben handed him and using them as he went.

He hadn’t even realized Lila had joined them until she demanded, “I want one too!”

“Lila,” Jeanette said firmly, not even looking up from the screen of her laptop. “Manners.”

Sighing, Lila said, “I want one too, _please.”_

“My legos!” Ben insisted, scowling.

“You gotta _share_ , it’s the _rules,”_ Lila said, stamping her foot.

Tony paused, looking between the two of them with wide eyes, then looked at Jeanette helplessly.

She glanced up and sighed. “Lila, remember that we talk nicely to people. Ben, there’s a lot of legos, you can share.”

Ben promptly started crying, Lila called him a crybaby, and Tony’s phone rang because _of course_ it would. Not that he wasn’t glad for the excuse to escape what looked to be quickly turning into a disaster.

He snatched his phone up and got to his feet quickly, leaving to the quiet (okay, relative quiet because boy was Ben really going now) kitchen to answer the call - this time Obie’s number.

“Tony, my boy!” Obie greeted, warm and happy. Tony shifted hopefully. “Where are you?”

“Somewhere discreet, like you suggested,” he answered after a moment. He ducked out to the backyard, just in case Obie could hear Ben and started questioning Tony some more.

Whether or not he managed to keep the Rhodeses in his life didn’t matter; he wasn’t letting the other side of his life touch this if he could help it. Not even from people he trusted, like Obie.

“Good, good. Not too far away though, I hope.”

“Still in the states.” Tony licked his lips. “How’re… things?”

“Ah, Tony, these things take time,” Obie sighed. “I’m hoping I can work your father around to see things our way. Be a lot easier than having to get lawyers and the public more involved than they already are. You know they’re going to favor him far more; scientific hero, built the company from the ground up. Looks better than young upstart that spends most of his time partying. If it comes to that we’ll have a lot more work to do.”

“I don’t want to take over the company, Obie, I just want-”

“I know, my boy, I know. But if it comes to that, you’re going to have to, and so we’ve got to be careful now. Give me more time to work on your father before we bring you back into this mess.”

Tony nodded. “I just want to do something different Obie. I don’t want to make weapons for a living,” he said quietly. “I want to help people.”

“Our weapons do good, Tony, but I think you’re right, this company needs to branch out into more things. Build up our image as more than war profiteers. Your father’ll see reason. Compromise, Tony! We’ll figure out a compromise between the two of you, and no one will ever have to know your father is trying to fire you.”

Technically… Howard _had_ fired Tony, except as Obie had pointed out when dropping by Tony’s apartment, the Board wasn’t too pleased with that. Tony was the young, fresh-minded genius. They knew who most of the new ideas were coming from, and it wasn’t Howard.

It was a mess, a stupid fucking mess of politics and technicalities, and Tony was glad Obie was taking care of it so he wouldn’t have to. Tony wouldn’t have _cared_ about being fired, except Howard had also sworn he’d make sure Tony _never_ worked for anywhere but SI.

Though Tony hated to admit it, Howard did have enough power and connections to make Tony practically unhireable. The places that _would_ hire Tony just to piss off Howard were places Tony did _not_ want to work for.

It was so fucking unfair.

“Okay Obie,” Tony sighed. “Thank you.”

“Think nothing of it, my boy! I’ll call to check in again in a few days.”

Tony murmured a farewell and hung up, slipping back inside and sighing heavily. It sounded like Jeanette had calmed her kids down, but Tony just didn’t feel like he had the energy to go out there and smile and pretend he wasn’t feeling the start of another stress headache.

He slipped out of the kitchen and snuck to the stairs. He didn’t know if he actually went unnoticed, but he wasn’t called after by the kids or Jeanette, so he gratefully escaped up to Rhodey’s room and fell onto the bed. It was dim, it was quiet, and the sheets and pillows smelled comfortingly like Rhodey.

Tony tried not to think about everything - about the fucked up situation with his dad, about what had pushed Tony into insisting he make less weapons and more medical advancements, about what exactly he was doing here with Rhodey - but he failed. Like he usually did when trying not to think about things. His best chances were when he could focus on a new project, but he didn’t have the tools for any of that here.

His headache steadily increased, until it was sharp and everywhere, making him wish for some way of getting rid of it. Most aspirins or tylenols just didn’t cut it - he knew, he’d tried all of them, in various combinations and dosages. Probably he should talk about this to a doctor, but….

Tony twisted and buried his face in a pillow, blocking out the light streaming in from the bottom of Rhodey’s curtains.

He missed Jarvis.

~*~*~

Jeanette pulled Rhodey aside almost as soon as he was through the door. Her brows were furrowed, eyes glancing back towards the living room a few times. He followed her into the kitchen, watching as she bit her lip and crossed her arms before talking.

“You need to check on Tony. He was fine earlier, and then Ben and Lila started fighting, and he was on his phone, and I haven’t seen him since. I think he’s up in your room, but… it’s not like Tony to hide away somewhere.”

Well, that wasn’t entirely true. Jeanette didn’t know about the times in college Rhodey’d get back from class or lunch with friends to find Tony curled up in Rhodey’s dorm bed. Sometimes it was simply because Tony didn’t want to be in his own apartment for some reason or another, but sometimes…. Sometimes Tony had just been there, quiet and subdued. It’d worried the fuck out of Rhodey for a while, until it just became a cause for cautious concern.

It happened when Tony was particularly stressed out over one thing or another. Usually he got nasty headaches - Rhodey’d almost call them migraines, but Tony scoffed when he brought it up so he’d stopped. Often they came after being around his parents, either just Howard or back at the mansion for the holidays.

Rhodey could remember one particularly hellish week with classes, where Tony had also been doing something for his dad’s company, been on the phone a lot with the man. Rhodey came back from a study session with some classmates to Tony curled up tight in the corner of his bed, breathing shallow and unsteady. His head had hurt enough - or maybe everything had just been overwhelming enough on top of the headache - that he’d been crying a little.

Just thinking about it made Rhodey itch to make sure Tony was okay.

“I’ll go up and check on him,” he promised, slipping around her already. She intercepted their mom as Rhodey headed upstairs, debating knocking on the door before just opening it and slipping inside. He closed it carefully, as quietly as possible.

The room was dim, and sure enough Tony was curled up on Rhodey’s bed, face almost entirely mashed into a pillow. He looked damn small when he was like that, almost as small as he had back at MIT. Rhodey walked over, kicking off his shoes before slipping onto the bed next to him, reclining on an elbow. He ran his hand gently over Tony’s back, up his shoulder.

“Hey man,” he said softly. “You okay?”

After a moment, Tony shrugged. Rhodey waited a little longer, was rewarded with a mumbled, “Head hurts.”

Which Rhodey had figured, but if Tony was admitting it and managing to speak at all, it wasn’t nearly as bad as it could be. Still, he kept his voice in a quiet whisper.

“Mama keeps the real good Excedrin downstairs. Want me to get you one?”

Another moment and Tony shrugged. He shifted just a bit, though, just a small press into Rhodey’s hand.

Rhodey shuffled closer.

“Jeanie’s kids scare you off?” he teased gently.

Tony snorted.

Grinning, Rhodey said, “Wouldn’t blame you. Lila’s cute, but she’s also a demanding little demon when she feels like it.” He rubbed up Tony’s neck, to the base of his head. Tony made a little noise, pleasure-pain. Rhodey had dealt with a hungover Tony enough to know what worked best for Tony’s headaches.

For a while they were quiet, Rhodey keeping up the soft massaging motions at the base of Tony’s skull and down his neck, Tony curled up quiet next to him.

“How’s your dad?” Tony asked, voice a little softer than a whisper.

Rhodey shifted so he was laying down at Tony’s back, only a few inches between them. “He was in a lot of pain today. Kind of drifted in’n’out a lot.”

Tony made a soft, sympathetic noise in his throat, stretching his feet back until they nudged Rhodey’s lower legs. Rhodey almost wrapped his arm around Tony, like they had in college. But it’d been… different then. Tony’d been a… a kid, just a lonely kid who was starved for attention of any sort, always wanting to be touched and to be touching.

It was how Tony’d best given - and received - affection back then, but that was years ago. Tony hadn’t even been eighteen yet, Rhodey was just looking out for him.

It wouldn’t be the same now. Would it?

Tony’s feet withdrew and he shifted, starting to get up. Rhodey saw the grimace on his face and immediately sat up as well.

“Hey, hey, what are you doing?” he asked, grabbing Tony’s shoulder. “You know moving around doesn’t make those headaches any better.”

Tony twitched, like he wanted to shrug Rhodey’s hand off. Rhodey pulled it back instantly, standing and crossing his arms.

“Just stay in bed, Tony. I’ll let Mama know and-”

“I’m fine,” Tony said instantly, looking particularly stubborn despite the way he was squinting against the pain.

Rhodey groaned. “C’mon, Tones, just… just stay up here a little longer, I’ll get you for dinner. I promise.”

Tony stared at him, then sighed and slumped back on the bed. “Fine,” he griped. “I’ll just lay here doing nothing all afternoon.”

Rhodey smiled fondly. “How will you survive?”

~*~*~

Tony stumbled his way down the stairs before Rhodey came to get him, once the light from under the curtain had dimmed to muted orange. His head still hurt but it was manageable, he’d had worse. He squinted when he stepped into the kitchen, the lights brighter than he’d expected and making his headache spike a bit.

“Tony, you said you’d rest until dinner,” Rhodey scolded, walking in front of him and putting a hand on his shoulder.

“‘M fine,” Tony mumbled. Rhodey took a step closer, frowning and worried, and Tony swayed forward just a bit, just until his forehead hit Rhodey’s shoulder. Rhodey slid his hand up to the back of Tony’s neck and began those light massaging motions again. Tony made a soft sound of pleasure.

“Will you at least take an Excedrin?” Rhodey murmured.

Tony sighed and shrugged. Rhodey gave a little last massage of Tony’s neck, then stepped away. Tony felt painfully aware of the way Jeanette was staring at him, brows pinched, of the concern on Roberta’s face. He shuffled in place debating if he should just go curl up in an armchair in the living room or something, or suck it up and sit down and pretend no one was giving him pitiful looks.

Rhodey reappeared in front of him before he could decide and handed him a small glass of water and a white pill to swallow. As soon as Tony did, Rhodey was directing him into a chair at the table and slipping back out of the kitchen. Tony kept his eyes mostly squinted closed, waiting tensely for Roberta or Jeanette to say something.

Rhodey came back pretty quickly though, holding out to Tony… a pair of sunglasses. Gratefully, Tony slipped them on. It was a much appreciated relief, and he slumped a little.

“Thanks Honeybear,” he muttered.

Rhodey’s hand squeezed his shoulder, a warm and reassuring weight, before he went back to… whatever it was he’d been doing. Tony bit his tongue against asking him to come back, to let Tony just rest his head on Rhodey’s shoulder some more. To bury it there and block out the light and focus on Rhodey - the rhythm of his breathing and his smell and… well, it wasn’t an option, even if Tony wanted it to be.

He sat at the table instead and closed his eyes behind the sunglasses, ignoring the sounds of the kitchen and instead thinking of the last project he’d been working on before Howard threw his little fit about Tony’s increasing success. He could see the schematics clearly - remembered right where he left off, and it was nothing at all to pick up from there and keep going. He became so absorbed in his work that he startled when Roberta ran a hand through his hair.

“Tony, honey, why don’t you and Rhodey take your plates upstairs tonight? I think you both could use some quiet time today.”

Tony would have argued - he was going to and everything, except then Roberta cut a worried look towards Rhodey, and Tony noticed the lines of stress around Rhodey’s eyes. The forced smile. The exhaustion. He nodded and got to his feet, going to stand next to Rhodey and make his plate as well. Before Rhodey could sit down, Tony grabbed his hand and tugged him towards the hallway. Roberta gave him a little smile as they went, just missing Jeanette and the kids coming into the kitchen in a burst of noise and energy.

The room was dark, but Tony hesitated to turn on the overhead light. Rhodey stepped inside and with only one stubbed toe and cursing, turned on the bedside lamp. It gave the room a much softer, more manageable yellow glow. Tony grinned at him and sat on the edge of the bed, legs folded and plate in his lap. Rhodey sat in the desk chair, leaning back with a little sigh.

They ate in silence, not uncomfortable or anything, just… there.

Tony finished eating first, setting his plate on the floor and leaning back against the pillows. He watched Rhodey eat - slow and like he was thinking about something else entirely, which, you know, he probably was. There was plenty for Rhodey to be worrying about, starting with his dad and ending with this charade he was pulling with Tony’s help.

It was a good thing Rhodey didn’t know about all the shit going on in Tony’s life at the moment. He didn’t need to be worrying about anything else, especially concerning Tony.

When Rhodey finally finished eating, Tony tried to think of something to say - plenty came to mind, all of it inappropriately humorous and definitely distracting - but before he could Rhodey held up a hand.

“Whatever you’re thinking of saying…. Don’t.”

Tony swallowed and nodded.

He watched as Rhodey grabbed their plates and slipped out of the room. Uncomfortable in the silence left behind, Tony got up and quickly changed into pajamas, turned his phone on silent in case Obie got any bright ideas about appropriate times to call, and climbed under the comforter.

Rhodey came back in about ten minutes later. Tony stayed turned onto his side, back to the door. He listened as Rhodey went to the dresser, disappeared into the bathroom. When he came back out, he clicked off the light and climbed in on the other side.

There was space between them again.

Tony thought of earlier in the afternoon, when Rhodey had rested so close and touched him like he used to back at MIT, like he cared, and felt a spasm in his chest. Closing his eyes, Tony took a deep breath and reminded himself that he’d survive Rhodey not caring about him like he wanted. That it was his own fault if Rhodey hardly wanted to be as close to him as they used to. That-

Rhodey shuffled closer, close enough that Tony could feel each exhale faintly against the back of his neck.

“Get some sleep, Tones,” Rhodey yawned.

Tony swallowed.

He didn’t say good night.

~*~*~

It was… unsettlingly easy to adjust to Tony being around all the time. He fit in smoothly, helping with breakfast in the mornings, watching the kids while Jeanette did some work, joking around at the dinner table until even Mama cracked a laugh despite everything.

Sometimes, Rhodey would stay home with Tony, while Jeanette went with Mama to see Dad. He probably should have been less surprised when Tony entertained the kids with science. He hustled them into the kitchen, onto stools at the counter, and using clear tall glasses, did some experiment with food coloring, soap, and milk.

Lila and Ben loved it.

The only thing that gave Rhodey any pause was the whole… fake relationship thing they had going on. No one seemed to suspect that the two of them were lying, which was good, because Rhodey suspected that if they did, they’d have noticed the times he hesitated or they exchanged uncomfortable glances.

The real problem was, a lot of the time Rhodey forgot.

Things weren’t so different than they’d been back before, before they’d graduated and before Rhodey had his first tour and before Tony had cut all ties without warning.

Tony was always touching him - except now they lingered, sometimes close to places that weren’t, strictly, platonic. The first time Tony had curled a hand around Rhodey’s hip, leaning against his side, Rhodey had almost jumped out of his damned skin. And Rhodey had to reciprocate. He knew that; he’d known that when he suggested this whole convoluted plan in the first place, it was just… execution was a little more difficult than he’d imagined.

Which was why he was very glad that his family didn’t suspect anything and were distracted by everything else going on. Surely they’d have noticed by now otherwise.

He hoped that his luck would hold just… just a little longer. Until he was more used to everything.

He barely twitched when Tony walked up behind him in the kitchen, yawning, and buried his face into the crook of Rhodey’s neck.

“Sugarplum… coffee,” he mumbled, almost whined.

Rhodey snorted, rolling his eyes, and reached over for the cup he’d already made while Tony had been helping Jeanette with the eggs.

Making a frankly lewd moan of happiness, Tony took the mug from Rhodey, calling over his shoulder, “This is why you’re my favorite!”

“Oh is that why?” Jeanette said, voice teasing and suggestive. Rhodey blushed, biting back an instant denial.

“Coffee is life,” Tony said seriously. “And Rhodey always makes me the best coffee.”

~*~*~

“Mommy, if Uncle Jim and Tony is gonna be married, why don’t’s they have any rings?”

Jeanette started laughing - which only made Lila scowl at her - as Rhodey choked on his sandwich. Tony’s eyes were wide, but he pounded Rhodey on the back, then rubbed soothingly when Rhodey gave him a small wave. Lila planted her hands on her hips.

“Mommy, why’s you laughing!”

“Because your Uncle Jim’s face was hilarious.”

Rhodey shot Jeanette a look that clearly conveyed what he couldn’t say in front of impressionable children.

“Why don’t’s they have rings? Married people have rings!”

“They’re not married yet,” Jeanette explained.

Lila frowned. “But they sleeps together like you and Daddy. And in the movies, when the man asks the girl to marry him he gives her a ring.” She turned to glare at Tony and Rhodey on the couch. “Uncle Jim, did you not gets Tony a ring ‘cause he’s a boy?”

Rhodey’s mouth opened and closed uselessly, eyes wide and a bit panicked.

Tony rolled his eyes and said, “I don’t have a ring because Rhodey didn’t actually plan on asking me. He was being spontaneous.”

Lila’s brow scrunched. “What’s that mean?”

Tony paused a moment. Right. Kid, not an adult or a genius. “It means… doing something without planning it.”

“Oh.” Lila considered it, then said, “Is he going to gets you a ring then?”

That time Tony paused, flicking a look at Rhodey.

“Um,” Rhodey croaked. Jeanette was watching them with amusement, Roberta looked curious.

Tony licked his lips. Obviously Rhodey was going to be of no use. “We’re gonna wait a bit on that, kiddo.”

“Why?”

“Because there’s more important things right now than rings.” Tony wondered if his bullshitting was as obvious to Lila as it felt it was to him. Or, hell, as obvious to Roberta and Jeanette.

“Like what?” Lila pressed.

“Like grandpa,” Rhodey said, face just a bit twisted, tense and stressed. “He-”

“Grampa tolds me that I shouldn’t not do stuff ‘cause I’m sad about him being sick,” Lila said with an almost imperious tone, like she was imparting a great wisdom. “So I think he’d want you to gets Tony a ring. Then I can call him Uncle Tony.”

Rhodey got up and left the room, leaving Tony sitting uncomfortably on the couch, face warm and hands clenched at his thighs. He could feel Jeanette staring, refused to look at the pity or suspicion or whatever that would be on her face. Lila was whining about how she hadn’t said anything mean so why had Uncle Jim gotten mad and Roberta was trying to explain to her.

Taking a deep breath, Tony got up and walked out after Rhodey. They’d expect that, probably. And the two of them needed to figure out what to say when the question possibly came up again.

Rhodey was outside, leaning against the side of the garage, a cigarette in hand. Tony frowned.

“Since when do you smoke?”

The glance Rhodey slid his way was surprisingly inscrutable. He didn’t answer, just took another drag and blew the smoke out slowly. Tony’s nose scrunched and he stayed a few feet away. He had smoked a bit in college - but only rarely cigarettes, he’d preferred a joint more than anything. Not so much anymore.

Tony had only seen Rhodey smoke a joint a few times while they were at MIT, usually after finals had finished or when he was stressed about a big project and Tony coerced him into relaxing a bit for a while. Rhodey hadn’t smoked cigarettes, so far as Tony knew.

The silence between them stretched, uncomfortable, and Tony shifted on his feet. So Rhodey wasn’t going to answer him. Fine, it was a stupid question and none of his business anyway.

“We didn’t do too bad for lying on the fly there,” he offered.

Rhodey made a rough, scoffing noise. Tony… really didn’t know quite what to do here, because he was pretty sure his usual methods of dealing with bad situations weren’t going to work. Would in fact make it worse, he was sure. But it left him lost as to what he _should_ be doing.

“I don’t think it’s going to be a problem,” he said. God, he hoped he said the right thing here. “I mean-”

Rhodey cut him off, saying bitterly, “Lila’s probably gonna mention it to Dad, and-”

“Oh, come on, she’s just a kid, they’re not going to-” Tony tried reassuring him.

“I’m going to get shit for not having a ring, or getting a ring, for my _supposed_ fiancé-”

“Rhodey, they’ll get why we haven’t-”

“Shut up, Tony!” Rhodey yelled. “Just because your family doesn’t give a shit when you fuck things up doesn’t mean mine won’t! They’re nosy as hell, like normal families, which means they won’t fucking drop it!”

Tony stared, feeling like the time he’d been slapped in the face at one of his mother’s charity balls by Beth - someone he’d thought had been a friend, who had thought they’d been more than that despite Tony never having even hinted at it, and therefore been pissed when he brought a date that wasn’t her. Shocked, hurt, and fucking _embarrassed_.

He looked down, swallowed, and forced up a big grin when he looked up again. “No, of course. You’re probably right.” He shoved his hands into the pockets of his jacket. “I’ll make sure your mom doesn’t come out here looking for you and catch you smoking.”

Tony did in fact bump into Roberta as he stepped inside the back door. She took one look at him, and despite the smile Tony gave her, frowned in concern. Her hand was warm on his upper arm.

“Tony? Honey, what happened?”

“Nothing,” he said, still smiling. “He’s just… he needs a moment, you know?”

Her brows puckered. “Sounded like it got a bit loud out there.”

Tony winced. “I’m not very good at the whole reassuring thing.” He gave her a grin, but it only made her frown worse. “Look, I… I need to go do some work, actually, call some people. No real vacation for me,” he joked, sidestepping and heading for the stairs.

He went up quickly. In the hallway he could hear the sounds of Jeanette waking Ben up from his nap in the kids’ room, so he ducked into Rhodey’s room and grabbed his cell before hurrying back downstairs. He snatched his jacket on the way out the door, waving when Roberta called after him but not stopping.

The air was getting cool and sharp as the wind blew in more dark clouds. Tony pulled on the jacket, realizing as he did that he’d accidentally grabbed Rhodey’s. For a step he hesitated, but if he went back inside Roberta probably wasn’t going to let him back out again.

Yeah, Rhodey’d just have to deal with it. Tony zipped the jacket up, definitely not tucking his nose down into the hem to breathe in the smell of Rhodey’s cologne that lingered there from constant use, and walked briskly for several blocks until the shakes in his hands stopped.  
Dialing Obie, Tony shivered and hunched his shoulders at a particularly strong gust of wind. The sun was fully covered now.

“Tony, what can I do for you?”

“Listen, Obie, I’m going crazy here. I’m going crazy not knowing what’s going on, or doing something.”

“Your father is a stubborn man, Tony. It’s taking time to work on him.”

“I just… maybe if I talk to him, explain….”

“And how well did that go before?” Obie asked pointedly.

Tony swallowed. “I know, but maybe if-”

“No, no. Let me handle this, Tony. Less emotion on both sides if you’ve got a middle man.”

Tony stared at the sidewalk under his feet, crookedly cracked in some places, grass or weeds or whatever poking up through the measured cracks two feet or so. “I guess.”

“Well I know, Tony,” Obie said firmly. “I’ve handled plenty of business deals before, I know how to do this.”

“I just… I can’t handle not doing anything, Obie, it feels like I’m-”

“Tony,” Obie sighed. There was a moment, and Tony could clearly picture Obie pinching the bridge of his nose. He hunched his shoulders more.

“Okay. How about I send one of the current SI projects to your email. You can work on it, and maybe it’ll help smooth things with your father if he sees you’re still willing to work on some of the weapons projects. Make it easier to convince him to _also_ allow you the freedom for some other types. Okay? How about we try that.”

“Okay,” Tony sighed. It’d be better than doing nothing.

“Great! I’ll get it to you by tonight. Wouldn’t do to leave you wallowing in boredom for much longer if you’re already about to crack.”

Tony’s lips twitched, a half-hearted attempt at a smile. “Thanks.”

“Think nothing of it, my boy. Now, I need to get back to work.”

“Right. Sorry.”

He shoved his phone in the pocket of Rhodey’s jacket and looked around. The area was only vaguely familiar, but he hadn’t taken any turns while walking that he recalled. So it was simply a matter of turning around and walking straight back to the Rhodeses.

Hopefully enough time had passed that everyone would be willing to pretend the afternoon’s conversation had never happened.

~*~*~

Jeanie pinned Rhodey with a disappointed look when he finally came back inside.

“What?” he grumbled, walking around her and heading for the stairs. She followed behind him, not saying anything until they were in his room, door shut. It was how all their arguments went, since they were kids - they’d follow each other into one of their bedrooms (or, back when they’d still lived in the small apartment, into the bedroom they shared) and have it out there.

Her arms were crossed when he turned around. She was giving him the kind of look he’d seen her give Lila and Ben when they tried to pretend they hadn’t done something wrong, which only made Rhodey more irritated.

“What are you giving me your Mom Look for?”

“Well, for one, not even that lame-ass air freshener is going to be enough to trick Mama about how you were smoking out there.”

He glared at her, but immediately pulled his shirt off, going to rummage for a new one. He tossed it onto the bed and stepped into his bathroom, wetting a washcloth and deciding it was best to be thorough just in case. Mama did seem to have a sixth sense for when he’d been doing something he wanted to hide from her.

Jeanette leaned in the doorway, still giving him an unimpressed stare instead of smirking at him.

“What else?” he asked, tossing aside the washcloth to grab his toothbrush.

She hesitated, seeming to think over whatever she was going to say. She didn’t look irritated anymore; now she was concerned, and that rankled even more.

“Do you actually want to marry Tony, or did you just ask because Dad brought the whole thing up again?” she asked.

He glared at her. Pulling out his toothbrush, he spat in the sink before saying, “I wouldn’t marry someone just to make Dad happy. What is with everyone asking me that?”

She shrugged. “I’m only asking because you seemed unreasonably upset about Lila’s question. Tony didn’t look entirely easy with it, either, but I figured… well, he’s not really used to kids.” Her expression turned scolding. “But he seemed okay enough until he came back from going after you.”

Rhodey paused, feeling a squirm of guilt. He _had_ bitten Tony’s head off out there.

Her eyes narrowed. “Mama tried to talk to him but he did that… thing he does.”

“The fake happy thing,” Rhodey sighed. He set the toothbrush back into its place.

“Yep.”

Rhodey braced his hands on the edge of the sink and took a deep breath, letting it out as a sigh. Alright. He definitely owed Tony an apology. He probably - okay, definitely - had done too far with that remark about Tony’s family.

Not because it was Tony’s family. But because he’d aimed it at Tony, specifically.

He winced and straightened. “Where is he?” he asked, slipping past Jeanie to grab his shirt and pull it on. She didn’t answer until he turned to face her again, her expression still disapproving.

“I don’t know. He left.”

“What?” Rhodey asked, voice sharp.

She raised a brow, the look so much like their mama’s that it was momentarily unsettling. “Right after he came back in. He went upstairs but came right back down and left. Mama tried asking him where he was going, but he didn’t say.”

“When was this?” Rhodey demanded.

Jeanette sighed impatiently, arms crossed. “I told you, right after he came back inside from talking to you.”

Which had been nearly a good hour ago.

“Fuck.” He pushed past Jeanette, hurrying down the stairs. His jacket wasn’t at the door where he’d left it, but he didn’t waste time trying to find it. Tony was _hopeless_ when it came to a sense of direction. If he’d been upset, if he’d wandered off and gotten lost….

“Jim!” Jeanie called after him. “Jimmy, damn it, put a jacket on, it’s raining!”

~*~*~

So, Tony probably should have gotten Rhodey’s phone number at some point since this had started. And Roberta’s and Jeanette’s, it’d have been reasonable but he’d figured, well, one of them was always around, so why bother? It was lazy and stupid, but the point was - he hadn’t gotten anyone’s number.

Which left him here, lost, and unable to call someone to help him get back. He didn’t know Rhodey’s address, either. He was an idiot, obviously.

To top off his _wonderful_ afternoon, it had started fucking raining.

Rhodey’s jacket was warm, sure, but it was also not water-resistant in any way, shape, or form. And now it was soaked. And cold.

He sniffed, hunching his shoulders further and licking water off his lips. There were houses all over - and they were all the same, okay, there was no way for Tony to decide if one was familiar or not. He turned a corner and saw a covered bench - a bus stop.

Tony trudged over and sat down, sniffing again, and slumped.

“Fuck,” he sighed.

The rain was slowing down, though still making steady plinking and plonking noises on the overhang above the bench. He’d just… sit here and wait until it stopped, then resume his stupid search for the stupid house.

He was getting hungry, and Roberta had been saying that morning she’d make homemade clam chowder for dinner. She put bacon in her clam chowder, Tony _loved_ it, no other clam chowder he’d had over the years quite compared. He was probably missing it - Rhodey’d eat all the leftovers because he was a dick like that and-

“Tony!”

He jerked upright, leaning forward to glance down the street. “Rhodey?”  
Sure enough, that was Rhodey jogging towards him, in a fucking t-shirt that was completely soaked through. He looked… well, _really fucking good_ was too simple a phrase for it. He stopped in front of Tony, breathing a little heavy, looking damned relieved.

“Why the fuck are you sitting here?”

“...Because I wanted out of the rain?” Tony asked.

Rhodey huffed, shaking his head. “You know my house is like two blocks away?”

Tony scowled. Rhodey chuckled, the sound a mix of amusement and relief, and reached out a hand to tug Tony to his feet, slinging an arm around his shoulders.

“Next time don’t go wandering off alone.”

Tony rolled his eyes. He was tempted to shrug off Rhodey’s arm, to keep some distance between them, except… except he’d never been very good at that. And he was a selfish asshole, so he’d take what little bits and pieces of Rhodey he could get, savor them while he had them.

“Whatever,” he grumbled. They walked along for a block, the rain easing to a light drizzle. Tony tugged the hood off his head, smirking when Rhodey made a noise at the plop of wet fabric over his arm.

“Hey, listen,” Rhodey said as they turned another corner. Tony could see the Rhodes’ house now, just a few houses away. He tried to walk faster, avoid whatever it was Rhodey was about to say, but Rhodey caught him by the arm and gently tugged him back. They stopped, right in the middle of the sidewalk, only a house away from Rhodey’s home.

“I was outta line,” Rhodey said quietly. “You didn’t deserve-”

“Hey, no big deal,” Tony said quickly. “Not like you said anything that wasn’t true.”

“Shouldn’t have said it, or bit your head off.” His hand went up, squeezed Tony’s shoulder up near his neck as he leaned in closer. Close enough their foreheads almost touched. Close enough that Tony could feel each warm exhale of air from Rhodey.

“It’s fi-”

“Just accept the damned apology, Tony.”

“Okay, yeah, whatever. Apology accepted. Can we go inside now?”

“Sure,” Rhodey sighed, sliding his arm back around Tony’s shoulders and leading the way to the house. “You can have first dibs on the shower - but I swear to god, you use up all the hot water and I’m gonna kill you.”

Tony hummed and said seriously, “You’ll have to bribe an agreement out of me with coffee.”

Rhodey laughed as they walked up the steps, reaching to open the door. “Sure Tony. I’ll make a coffee, but it’s going to just sit on the counter until you come out of the shower, so if the hot water gets used up, your coffee will be cold.”

“So mean,” Tony sighed, shaking his head as he pulled off the jacket. Rhodey took it from him and leaned back outside to lay it over the back of a porch chair. “Roberta, your son is being mean!” Tony called out when she poked her head in from the living room.

“Snitch,” Rhodey muttered as he closed the door.

Tony grinned - and resisted the urge to lean up and kiss Rhodey’s cheek. Just because Rhodey had his hand on Tony’s back, and had come looking for him in the rain, didn’t mean that anything was different. No matter how much Tony’s stupid heart wished it was.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next part!!! Hope everyone enjoys. :)

Tony could hear rain outside, striking the window and roof pretty heavily. He was drifting, in that place where he _could_ wake up if he wanted, but much more easily could fall back asleep. It was nice and warm in Rhodey’s bed - he thought he was hugging a bunch of the comforter, or maybe the pillow.

Rhodey’s arm was around him, warm puffs of breath tickling the back of his neck.

It was painfully reminiscent of MIT. A morning after Tony had snuck into Rhodey’s room, drunk or stressed, and been accepted, comforted, without demands or lectures, just… comforted. It’d been a long time since he felt this, this peaceful. He wanted to cling to the feeling.

Tony didn’t want to wake up - but he wasn’t quite sure he wanted to go back to sleep, either.

Faintly, he was aware of the sounds of people moving downstairs, talking. He should get up - he was usually up by now to help with breakfast, but he’d stayed up with Rhodey last night watching movies on Netflix and eating junk food. He knew it’d been Rhodey’s way of apologizing for what he’d said - and Tony had been more than willing to accept it. It was almost painfully familiar, how a lot of nights had been spent in college. But with a better bed.

The noise downstairs increased, and then loud steps pounded up the stairs. The door slammed open hard enough to ricochet, startling Tony awake.

Rhodey jerked awake too, hand slamming under the pillow on his side of the bed, eyes instantly alert - if not there for a few moments.

Tony cautiously reached out to touch his shoulder. “Rhodey…”

He could feel Rhodey tense, and then relax all at once.

“Lila, you know better than to burst into someone’s room-”

“Daddy’s here!” she squealed, ignoring what Rhodey was saying.

Tony watched from the corner of his eye as Rhodey adjusted something under his pillow and drew his hand back out. He squeezed his forehead, sighing.

“Yeah, but L-”

“Come see Daddy, Uncle Jim!” she insisted, before darting back out of the room and down the stairs.

Tony leaned forward until his head rested against the back of Rhodey’s shoulder. “Maybe we should start locking the door.”

Rhodey snorted. “Jeanie would never let us live it down.”

Shrugging, Tony got out of the bed and walked over to grab a change of clothes. “I can put up with some teasing if you can,” he said simply, heading for the bathroom. He didn’t wait for Rhodey’s reply.

Rhodey’d always been weird about the rumors or insinuations that he and Tony got up to things at MIT. Defensive and angry. He’d told Tony more than once that it wasn’t fair to either of them, that people assumed the only reason Rhodey would care about Tony would be because of sex. Tony didn’t get why Rhodey cared so much what everyone else thought about their friendship. It didn’t matter. Tony knew Rhodey wasn’t interested in sex with him.

And maybe that hurt a bit, but knowing someone cared about him _for him_ was too rare a concept for Tony to ever dare jeopardize it. Then, and now.

By the time Tony came out of the bathroom, Rhodey was gone. He went downstairs, following the noise of people laughing and talking to find everyone crammed into the kitchen.

Standing in the doorway, looking in at everyone, Tony sharply felt like an outsider, more than usual.

Roberta was at the stove, scrambling eggs in a pan, but tilted to see the rest of the room, a warm and happy smile on her face. Lila and Ben were at the table, where Alex was sitting. Tony had met him a few times, one of which had been Alex and Jeanette’s wedding. Alex had Ben in his lap, one arm curled around him, and he was gesturing with the other hand as he talked to Rhodey. Jeanette leaned against the back of his chair, looking more relaxed and happier than Tony had seen, a cup of coffee cradled to her chest as she stared down at her husband and children.

He crept back from the doorway, heart racing. Maybe he could just go back upstairs - he couldn’t go outside, it was still raining, but-

“Tones?”

Tony froze, for just a moment, panicked and guilty, though that was ridiculous he wasn’t doing anything wrong.

Just… leaving the family to their family moment or whatever. He’d been doing them a favor, not intruding, not-

Rhodey’s hand slid up his back to his shoulder, warm, familiar, and it was stupid but Tony felt like crying, like he was being overwhelmed with how unfair it all was, how much it hurt, how much he _wanted_ and couldn’t have.

“What’s wrong?” Rhodey asked, soft and concerned, stepping forward, in front of Tony.

Tony shook his head. But he didn’t dare speak, not when he wasn’t sure what would come out of his mouth.

Sighing, Rhodey tugged him just a bit closer and slid his arms around Tony, holding him there, rubbing his back in slow, firm strokes. It left Tony with his face tucked against Rhodey’s shoulder. He tensed against the urge to wrap his own arms around Rhodey’s waist and not let go, to break down and let Rhodey just hold him up, to let Rhodey take care of him for a little bit.

“Shh,” Rhodey murmured into his hair. “Whatever it is, Tones, we’ll figure it out.”

A completely involuntary noise, like a strangled laugh or protest, escaped Tony. It only made Rhodey hold him more tightly.

“Jim, did you - oh,” Jeanette said, jerking to a stop. She frowned, looking at the two of them with worry. “Are you okay?”

“We’re fine,” Rhodey said, twisting slightly to look back at Jeanette, still rubbing a hand up and down Tony’s back. Tony squeezed his eyes shut and ducked his head down a bit more against Rhodey’s shoulder. He could feel the embarrassment turning his face red.

There was a moment of silence, then Jeanette said quietly, “We were thinking we could all go see Dad today, since Alex is here.”

“I’ll get back to you on it,” Rhodey said. Tony waited until Rhodey had shifted again, assuming that Jeanette had gone back, before speaking.

“You should go,” he said, voice a bit hoarse. He swallowed and cleared his throat. “I’ll just-”

“You dumbass,” Rhodey sighed, hand skimming up to stroke over Tony’s hair instead. “Jeanie said _all_ of us - that includes you.”

“I… I don’t want….”

Sighing again, Rhodey pulled back and ducked down a bit, eyes narrowed slightly as he searched Tony’s face for something. “Is that what this is? Tony, I….” He stopped lips pressing together. “You _are_ family, Tony. If you think Mama’s just saying it to be nice, then listen to me when I tell you - you’re family. I love you, and you’re family. You’ve always been family.”

And that - that was just like a goddamn stab straight to Tony’s heart, because _fuck_ he loved Rhodey too but _not like that_. And he wished - he fucking _wished_ \- that Rhodey loved him the way Tony loved him. He swallowed, swallowed again, nose tingling, eyes blurring and -

“Shit,” he croaked, glad when Rhodey met him halfway, wrapping him up tight again when Tony leaned forward.

“Doesn’t matter how long it’s been, doesn’t matter what happens between us, you’re family, you’re always going to be family, Tony. I’ve got your back, I know you’ve got mine. I’m not going anywhere. Jesus, Tony, hey.”

He started walking them… somewhere. Tony didn’t know, and couldn’t figure it out because he was crying now, all messy and hard enough to hurt his chest, and he couldn’t decide if it was because what Rhodey said felt so good or hurt so fucking much. It was ridiculous – he shouldn’t be this emotional over this – but Rhodey just kept making soothing noises and touching Tony comfortingly, and Tony had missed him, missed this, and-

Rhodey shifted downwards, pulling Tony with him, and then sideways. Couch then. They were on the couch, and Rhodey had settled with Tony on top of him and was still rubbing his back and sometimes shifting up to stroke his hair and whispering a comforting mantra of ‘I’m here, I’ve got you, I’ve always got you’.

Vaguely Tony was aware of people moving around. Of the kids’ voices sounding worried, of Alex saying something quiet, of someone coming over and saying something to Rhodey before leaving again.

It was really quiet in the house for a while.

Tony felt exhausted, and his face stiff and tacky. Rhodey was still rubbing his back, quiet now as well. He stopped when Tony shifted, too drained to feel embarrassed about any of what had just happened. Part of him wanted to immediately get off of Rhodey, reassert some distance between them because if he let himself have this… if he let himself get used to this, only to lose it….

“Where’s everybody?” he croaked.

“Went out for breakfast,” Rhodey said quietly. “Mom said there’s scrambled eggs and sausage for us in the kitchen to eat.”

Tony thought about apologizing for ruining the morning, but even as he did, Rhodey’s eyes narrowed warningly.

“Don’t even think about saying some kind of apology for this, Tony.”

“I chased your family out of their own-”

“You didn’t chase anyone out,” Rhodey said, rolling his eyes. Tony realized Rhodey’s hand was still on Tony’s back, just barely petting him in an absent sort of way. “They thought we’d appreciate the space for a while, is all.”

“Still-”

“Shut up,” Rhodey sighed. “How long have you been ready to burst, huh? Why didn’t you tell me if was too-”

“It’s not too much!” Tony stopped when Rhodey gave him a pointed look. If it’d just been skeptical he could have kept it up, but Rhodey was _concerned_ , so Tony ground his teeth a bit and admitted, “So I might not have let on about a few things.”

“Like?” Rhodey asked warily.

Huffing, Tony shifted upright, pulling away. They both straightened, but Rhodey kept one leg folded onto the couch, watching Tony intently. Tony didn’t _want_ to admit about things with his dad and the company, but if it kept Rhodey from blaming himself for… _that_ earlier, or kept Rhodey from thinking too much about the why of it all? Well.

“SI things,” he said. “Dad.”

“What’s Howard done this time?” Rhodey asked, looking just as ready to go kick ass in Tony’s defense as he had back at MIT.

“We just disagree about what, exactly, my priorities should be. I think a new direction would be smarter, he likes how things are. Typical generational gap disa-”

“Does this have to do with your vacation?”

Tony sighed dramatically and rolled his eyes. “Okay, so maybe it wasn’t a _voluntary_ vacation, but-”

_“What?”_

“It’s not-”

“Why didn’t you _tell me?”_ Rhodey demanded.

“Because it doesn’t matter!” Tony snapped. “You’re not going to be able to do anything about it, and you have enough going on without my stupid-”

“This isn’t stupid Tony, it’s a big deal.”

“It’s really not. Obie’s helping, gonna find us a middle ground, it’s taken care of. Really. Just… stressful, I guess, I don’t know, stop looking at me like that.” Tony shoved to his feet, heading for the kitchen.

The eggs were a little cold and rubbery, so they popped all the food in the microwave. Tony focused exclusively on his coffee; thankfully Rhodey got the message and left the whole thing alone.

“If you’re up for it, you want to, I mean… we’re going to visit Dad this afternoon.”

Tony looked up. Rhodey wasn’t looking at him, just pushing food around on his plate. It looked like he was trying to be casual when the answer probably mattered, so Tony took a bit to think about it - about the conversation before his little show of emotion that scared everyone out of the house.

Rhodey _wanted_ him to go, Tony realized. Whether because of some reason to do with their charade or because he wanted the support. Tony didn’t know, didn’t care.

“Yeah, okay,” he said, looking back down at his own plate.

Guess he’d better be ready to put on a show for Terrence Rhodes.

~*~*~

If Rhodey hadn’t been there for it, he’d have never been able to tell Tony had completely broken down earlier that morning. By the time the others got back from breakfast, Tony was grinning and energetic, greeted Alex with a handshake and a joke.

Mama looked worried, but Rhodey just gave a reassuring nod. It was what Tony did; he broke down, he bounced back. Sometimes better than others, sometimes quicker, but he bounced back.

They piled into two cars - Jeanette and the kids in Alex’s, Mama with him and Tony - and left for the hospital. Tony kept Rhodey’s mom entertained with talk about some broadway musical he’d seen that she had heard about while Rhodey drove, following behind Jeanette’s car. The rain had let up for the moment, but the roads were slick and the sky heavily overcast.

Tony kept a smile and light chatter as they walked into the hospital and got into the elevator. It was as it went up, and they came out, that he quieted.

Rhodey glanced at him, then down at his hands. Sure enough, a finger was tracing around and around the knuckle of his thumb.

Well, they were pretending to be engaged. So Rhodey reached out without a word for Tony’s hand, gently pushing his fist open and curling his hand around Tony’s.

Tony looked at him, eyes wide and startled.

Rhodey smiled and squeezed, watched as Tony took a deep, quiet breath and let it out slowly. If as they walked down the hall he shifted a bit closer to Rhodey’s side, Rhodey wasn’t going to mention it.

Dad looked… not better, but appeared in better spirits this time. Maybe he wasn’t in as much pain, Rhodey thought hopefully.

A part of him, childishly, thought, ‘ _Maybe he’s getting better_ _._ ’ But Rhodey knew that he never would. There wasn’t really such a thing as miracles.

Rhodey hung back with Tony while Alex stepped forward, leaning over to hug Terrence and talking a little about work, and then Lila and Ben were climbing up onto the foot of the hospital bed, Lila sitting on her knees and leaning forward intently.

There was half a second that Rhodey didn’t think about it, but then-

“Grampa, Uncle Jim made Tony sad,” she said.

“Lila!” Jeanette said, frowning, reaching out to touch her shoulder.

Rhodey’s dad raised a brow and looked over at Mama, who sighed and shrugged. Dad followed the tilt of Mama’s head over to where they both stood, Tony looking down around the room uneasily, Rhodey staring up at the ceiling helplessly.

“Well, they seem okay now,” Dad said after a moment. “Course, they always were attached at the hip when together, isn’t that right Roberta?”

Mama smiled, looking mischievous. “Sure is. Remember that New Year’s Eve-”

“No one’s allowed to remember that party,” Tony said quickly, looking up. The tips of his ears were pink.

Rhodey frowned, looking between them all. “I don’t remember that party.”

Jeanette snorted, failing to hold back a laugh, and Tony directed a glare at her. “Because _no one_ remembers that party.”

“You’re right, Tony,” Dad agreed, nodding. “None of us remember you two snuggling each other in the armchair, and we definitely don’t have pictures of you two passed out on each other.”

Tony’s shoulders slumped and he sighed, “You’re so mean, Terrence.”

Dad laughed, the sound breathy and weak, but not as bad as Rhodey had heard it before. It really must be a good day. Rhodey decided to focus on that instead of the night he apparently didn’t recall, that he’d spent cuddling with Tony in his house. He realized it must have been the New Year’s Eve right before he started dating….

“Come here and give me a proper hello, Tony.”

Tony walked forward, leaning over, letting Terrence wrap his arms around him. They stayed there for a moment - Dad whispered something to Tony that Rhodey couldn’t catch, then squeezed Tony tighter - and when Tony finally backed away, his eyes were bright and he swallowed thickly.

Rhodey frowned, silently asking if he was okay. Tony’s smile was tremulous and trying so hard to be cheerful. Rhodey reached out and squeezed his hand.

Tony sucked in a slightly hitching breath. A few moments later, he squeezed back.

They all settled into positions around the room. The TV played quietly in the background, and once a nurse came in to check on Dad, take his order for lunch, ask if he needed more pain medication. Rhodey swallowed down the lump in his throat and stared at his feet until the tickling in his eyes was under control.

Tony eased up next to him, sliding a hand uncertainly up his back to his shoulder, leaning just the slightest bit against Rhodey’s side.

When he felt like he could handle it once more, Rhodey gave him a thankful smile and shifted away, closer to his dad’s bed. Jeanette left her seat so Rhodey could take it, saying something about taking the kids to get snacks to tide them over until they went home for lunch.

She was back by the time Rhodey noticed it, the way his dad kept glancing over at Tony, watching him for a minute or two before focusing back on the rest of the family. Rhodey glanced over once, but didn’t see anything wrong. Tony raised a brow at him, questioning, and Rhodey just shrugged, offering a smile.

Tony smiled back, the little one that quirked one side of his mouth and was one of the more honest expressions Tony had. It made Rhodey’s smile a little easier, a little stronger.

Dad huffed suddenly, eyes flicking to Roberta.

“Sweetheart, do we got loads to discuss.”

She frowned a bit, then her expression cleared and she hummed an agreeable note.

Jeanette and Rhodey exchanged looks, feeling the same kind of trepidation they did as kids. “...What is it?” Jeanette dared to ask.

“Adult stuff,” Dad answered promptly, which led to Jeanette throwing her hands up and exclaiming, “I _am_ an adult Dad!”

“Sorry, it’s level eight adult stuff. You’re not there yet.”

She rolled her eyes, grumbling about how Dad wasn’t as funny as he thought he was.

Tony was grinning, shoulders shaking with a little quiet laugh.

By the end of the hour, Dad was tired though, face pinching a bit. The nurse came by and gave him more pain medication, and they all said their goodbyes and trooped out. Rhodey glanced around as they stepped out into the hall, realizing Tony wasn’t with them, and looked back to see that Dad held Tony’s hand between both of his, talking to him with a serious expression.

Rhodey eased closer to the door, a mix of worried and concerned.

“-glad you’re here, kid. Family’s missed you, but don’t go thinking we blame you for needing some space. I always knew why you did, never thought badly of you for it. But I’m glad he’s got you now. He’s going to need you there, even if he’s not ready to admit just how much.”

“I’m stubborn,” Tony said.

“Hmm,” Dad said. “You are, but we both know the exact shape of your soft spot, now don’t we kid?” He patted Tony’s hands and smiled gently. “No shame in it. None at all, Tony. I hope you’ll come by again.”

“Yeah,” Tony said hoarsely. “Probably.”

“Good. Now, go, and remember what I said.”

“Bye, Terrence.”

Rhodey backed down the hall, just enough not to appear to have been eavesdropping, and leaned against the wall. Tony scrubbed his eyes with the back of a hand as soon as he cleared the corner of Dad’s door. He started when he saw Rhodey there, sniffed sharply.

“What, thought I’d get lost or something?”

Rhodey ignored it. “You okay man?”

Tony nodded, shoving his hands deep in his jacket pockets. “Sure. C’mon, I’m starving. You want to go out to eat somewhere, or is your mom going to make something particularly delicious?”

Deciding to let Tony have his evasion, Rhodey shrugged. He slung an arm over Tony’s shoulders when he was in reach, tucking him against his side safely. “Don’t know. You can ask her in the car.”

~*~*~

A few days later, Tony and Rhodey volunteered to watch the kids while Jeanette and Alex visited Terrence.  Roberta was out running errands, so it was just the four of them, and the movie Rhodey put on only entertained the kids for about an hour before they were restless.

“When’s Mommy and Daddy going to be back?” Lila whined.

“Soon,” Rhodey offered.

Lila sighed, impatient. “You saids that forever ago Uncle Jim.”

Tony was grinning a bit, hiding it in Ben’s hair. Rhodey gave him a dirty look.

“I’m bored,” Lila said five minutes later. “Play a game with me.”

“What do you want to play?” Rhodey asked.

“I don’t know,” Lila said, tone just a bit too rude. Rhodey narrowed his eyes.

“Lila,” he warned.

She made a long, whining noise and stomped her foot. “I-”

“Want to make a fort in the living room?” Tony interrupted. “That’s a great idea.”

Mouth still open for a moment, Lila blinked, then shifted excitedly. “Yes, yes!” Turning to Rhodey, she grabbed onto him and jumped up and down. “Uncle Jim can we? Can we _please?_ _”_

Rhodey had a moment of panic, glancing over at Tony, who just smiled and stood up, shifting Ben onto his hip. After the weeks they’d been here, he did it as smoothly as Rhodey ever saw Jeanette or Alex do so. He’d always known Tony would be good with kids, even if Tony would loudly declare why he wouldn’t be to anyone who would listen.

Tony winked at Lila and said, “I bet I can convince him. Why don’t you and Ben go get some blankets and pillows.” Glancing at Ben, Tony added, “Sound good?”

When Ben nodded, Tony set him down next to Lila and watched them scurry upstairs before turning to Rhodey with a grin, walking closer.

“This is going to be a disaster,” Rhodey sighed.

“Nah. We’re both engineers, what could-”

“So much. So much can - and probably will - go wrong. Something is going to break and somebody’s going to cry.”

Grinning, Tony nudged his side. “You worry too much, platypus. I happen to have learned from a fort-making master.”

Rhodey raised a brow skeptically, though he was pretty amused, and the kids scrambled back in, arms filled with their pillows and blankets.

In a way, Rhodey was right. It was a disaster, but a fun one. They’d shoved the furniture aside - Tony bossing Rhodey around about where to place everything, much to Lila’s and Ben’s amusement - and ended up raiding the hall closet for more blankets and sheets. Tony went to Rhodey’s room and dragged in their comforter, spreading it out on the floor in front of the TV, which was at the back of the fort.

It was well past lunch when they finished. Rhodey took the kids outside to run around for a little while, letting Tony make lunch. He’d seemed off, if only a little, said something about there being specific fort-food and not to worry about it.

There was obviously a story behind the fort, one that Rhodey didn’t know but that mattered to Tony. He’d get it eventually.

Twenty-five minutes later, Tony was calling them back inside, presenting them bacon grilled cheese sandwiches and chocolate milk. Rhodey vetoed eating in the fort, earning three pouts. He rolled his eyes and ruffled Tony’s hair, earning a little happy smile.

Tony washed the kids up after they finished eating, Rhodey did the dishes in the sink, and then it was time for the fort.

They put on a Disney movie the kids had brought with them for the trip. Tony was stretched out on his stomach, between Lila and Ben, making comments about the movie. Lila declared she wanted magic hair, but Tony pointed out how magic hair sure seemed more trouble than it was worth, and in the end Rapunzel liked her new, normal hair more.

“I guess,” Lila said.

“I’m a genius, I’m always right,” Tony said. He twisted to look back over his shoulder at Rhodey. “Honeybear, tell Lila I’m always right.”

“You sure think you are,” Rhodey teased.

“Hey, I am always-”

“Usually,” Rhodey said.

Tony’s eyes narrowed. “Sourpatch, I am _hurt_ that you doubt me like this.” Turning to Ben, Tony said, “Did you see that, Ben? No faith, none. Your uncle Rhodey is so mean to me.”

“Sure I am Tony.” Rhodey rolled his eyes, smiling a little. “I’ll remember that next time you make puppy eyes at me in the morning for coffee.”

“Blackmail!” Tony cried out, rolling around so he was sitting and facing Rhodey. “This is an outrage, who do I talk to around here about this!”

“Gramma,” Lila said surely.

“Well Grandma’s not here,” Rhodey said with a sly smile. “Guess that leaves me in charge.”

“Says who?” Tony demanded.

“I’m the oldest,” Rhodey taunted. “Everyone knows that makes me in charge.”

Lila sighed and nodded. “Uncle Jim is right.”

Tony’s eyes narrowed, sparking mischievously.

“Tony…” Rhodey said slowly, holding up his hands. “Whatever you’re-”

Lunging forward, Tony tackled Rhodey to the ground, tickling his sides. “Admit I’m always right!” Tony demanded.

“No!”

“Admit it, honeybear!”

“Tony!”

“And take back your threat about my - hey, no!” Tony protested, twisting away from Rhodey’s tickling fingers at the back of his knee. “Rhodey! Stop! Stop!” he insisted through laughter, rolling away and kicking his legs out of Rhodey’s reach. Rhodey went to go after him, only to find Ben on top of him, giggling and tickling mercilessly.

Rhodey responded in kind, cracking up when Lila started to tickle him, only to switch sides and tickle Ben.

“Help, help!” Ben laughed.

“I’ll save you!” Tony said dramatically (dork), diving forward and tickling Lila until she shrieked with laughter and darted away from him. Tony plucked Ben off of Rhodey and let him go. Ben ran over to Lila, giggling still.

Plopping on top of Rhodey, pinning his hands to the floor, Tony said, “I win. That means I’m in charge now, right?”

Rhodey could easily break free, flip them, buck Tony off of him. Instead he agreed breathlessly. “Sure Tony. You’re in charge now.”

“Hmm…” Tony hummed low in his throat. His cheeks were still a bit flushed from laughing, hair a complete mess, and he looked more like that kid from MIT than Rhodey could remember seeing in a long while. It was good to see - made him grin like a dork right back at Tony, warmth in his chest because this was Tony _happy_. Tony rarely looked happy as often as he should.

“What - oh!”

Tony jerked off of Rhodey, cheeks flushing bright red again.

Jeanette and Alex stood smirking in the doorway of the living room, staring down at the two of them on the floor.

Thankfully the kids ran out of the fort, crying “Mommy!” and “Daddy!” and latching onto them with tight hugs, so the attention didn’t linger. Rhodey shifted to his feet smoothly, cheeks warm though hopefully it went unnoticed.

Tony climbed out behind him, cheeks still red. “I’ll uh… clean this up,” he mumbled.

“I’ll help,” Alex offered. “Those two can start wrangling the kids to get ready for dinner.”

“Dinner?” Rhodey asked, frowning.

“Mom wanted to go out tonight. She doesn’t feel up to cooking.” Jeanette shot Rhodey a look, one that meant she would explain more later, privately. So Rhodey just agreed and followed her upstairs.

~*~*~

Tony wanted to twitch, fidget, something, but he had learned a long time ago how to keep that under control. Still, the constant glances from Jeanette’s husband, that Tony hadn’t spoken to much over the past few days and had barely even met much before that, made him uneasy.

He knew what it’d looked like. Him on top of Rhodey like that, and Tony had no idea how much of his desire to just lean down and kiss Rhodey had been on his face. Not enough for Rhodey to notice, but then, Tony had to wonder how fucking oblivious Rhodey could be. He’d never noticed, seemingly, in college as well and Tony doubted he’d been half as subtle back then.

“It’s good to see him letting someone in after Todd,” Alex said suddenly.

Tony looked over, brows raised. “Okay,” he said slowly.

Shaking his head, Alex said, “I don’t know how much anyone’s told you, about after you lost touch and the whole Dear John letter thing-”

Tony scowled. “Should you even be talking to me about this stuff? Rhodey’s pretty private.”

“I just-” Alex said, looking surprised.

“Well don’t!”

Alex held up his hands, brows furrowing. “Alright. Okay, Tony. I just… thought maybe you’d like someone to talk to about it, you know, if you were worried or something.”

“Why would I-”

“Because sometimes Jeanie says you look at him like you’re worried about something, and we figured it might be something related to Todd. You… I guess it’s just nice to see him so happy for once, and we wanted to help.”

Tony swallowed, feeling slightly trapped. “I… I uh….”

“I shouldn’t have been talking about it, though, you’re right.” Alex shrugged, leaning a hip against the doorframe. “Has he talked to you about it?” There was a furrow between his brows, worry clear.

“Sure,” Tony lied. “Of course we have.”

Expression clearing, obviously reassured, Alex nodded and straightened. “Okay, good. It really shook him up, but I’m glad he’s finally getting over it. God knows Todd was full of shit for what he said about Rhodey.”

Tony nodded, having no idea what Alex was talking about. He had known from the few emails the family had sent him that Rhodey and Todd had broken up, but he’d not known… any of this. At the moment, he was kind of wishing he did.

Rhodey and Jeanette reappeared with the kids, Ben walking over and stretching his arms up for his dad. Alex bent immediately, setting Ben on his hip and kissing his forehead. Tony was busy watching Rhodey, though. He looked pensive. After hesitating a moment, Tony walked over and took Rhodey’s hand, squeezing. (It was okay, because they had to act like a couple.)

“Are you okay?” he murmured, slowing them down to linger behind Jeanette and her family as they left the house.

“Yeah. Fine.”

Tony frowned, chewing the inside of his lip for a moment. “You don’t have to lie-”

“Drop it, Tony,” Rhodey said, then seemed to realize how harsh it had been and sighed. “Please? Just… drop it.”

“Okay,” Tony whispered. He put on a smile and waved at Jeanette as their car pulled out, waiting as Rhodey went around and unlocked the car.

It was quiet and tense on the way to the restaurant. In contrast, the restaurant was lively and noisy. Roberta beamed and kissed both Tony and Rhodey on the cheeks. Conversation never faltered, never turned to something upsetting. No one remarked on Rhodey’s poor mood - and to be fair, about halfway through the meal it improved. Tony was startled when Rhodey reached out to squeeze Tony’s knee, though he was careful not to show it. He glanced over at Rhodey, questioning, and got a small apologetic smile in return.

Shrugging slightly, Tony reached down and gave Rhodey’s hand a small pat.

They didn’t talk about it, what had upset Rhodey - but then, Tony knew it wasn’t really his place to ask.

After all, he and Rhodey _weren’t_ actually in a relationship.

~*~*~

Rhodey was gone the next morning before Tony woke up, as was Jeanette and Alex. It was almost disturbingly quiet, with the kids still asleep in their room and only Roberta moving around the kitchen, making biscuits.

“Where is everybody?” Tony asked, once he’d made himself a cup of coffee.

Roberta smiled over at him. It was thin and tired, and worried Tony.

“What is it? What’s wrong?” he asked, fingers tightening around his coffee mug.

Sighing, she admitted, “Terrence isn’t doing well. I sent Jeanie and Rhodey to visit him, since….” She sighed again, offered another thin, unhappy smile, and he could hear what she didn’t say.

Tony felt himself pale. “He seemed… when we visited, last week, he seemed….”

Roberta nodded, focusing on stirring the gravy in the pan instead of facing Tony. “He’s taken a bad turn.”

Tony swallowed. “I….”

She turned off the stove, grabbing two plates and placing biscuits on them, pouring gravy over the top. She placed them at the table and stood there waiting for Tony to join her before she sat down.

“Rhodey’s been taking it badly. As I’m sure you’ve noticed,” she said, smiling slightly.

Tony nodded vaguely, staring down at his plate.

“When I visited yesterday it was… a bad day.” She let out a slightly shaky breath. “Terrence begins forgetting things, little things, like where someone went or the grandkids’ names. Chances are today’s not going to be much better. Rhodey’s going to be in rough shape when he comes home.”

Tony looked at her.

“I’ll be taking the kids to a program at the library, and Alex and Jeanie have already said they plan to go visit some friends after. It’ll just be the two of you for a few hours.”

Looking back down at his plate, Tony nodded.

A few hours later, after Roberta had fed the kids lunch and packed them into her car to take to the library, Tony heard the front door open and close. He hesitated, then saved his work and tucked away his laptop, taking a deep, steadying breath. Getting off the bed, he stepped into the hall and down the stairs, hand lingering on the rail as he glanced around for Rhodey.

He spotted him on the couch, slumped over, hands cradling his head. Rhodey didn’t react when Tony came over to sit next to him, didn’t say anything, didn’t even twitch. Tony hesitantly put his hand on Rhodey’s back and then rubbed up and down.

“How bad?” he asked, bracing himself for it.

Rhodey swallowed thickly and took a long minute to respond. “He forgot… he was asking about….” Rhodey sucked in a sharp breath, abruptly leaning back and dropping his head to stare at the ceiling. “Bad, Tony. It was bad.”

Tony nodded. He knew saying sorry wouldn’t help - he’d hated hearing it after Jarvis had died, which he knew wasn’t the same but still, similar principle - so he just said, “You eaten yet?”

Rhodey shook his head.

“Alright.” Tony got to his feet, rubbing his hands briskly over his thighs. “Go change into pajamas, I’ll make comfort food.”

Rhodey’s head rolled to look at him, a brow slowly rising.

“You know the drill,” Tony said, eyes darting around the room. He flapped a hand at Rhodey. “I mean, we never had to do it for you, it was always my ass that needed comforting, but hey, great time to repay the favor or whatever, go on, pajamas.”

A tired smile twitched into existence for a moment, before Rhodey heaved himself up off of the couch. “Fine. We gonna do this in the room?”

Tony nodded absently, already trying to think of what to make Rhodey. Pancakes? Nah, not comforting enough. Soup though, soup could be easy and it was warm and comforting and Jarvis had always made Tony tomato soup when he was sad. Tony could totally handle tomato soup from a can.

Twenty minutes, and he was backing into Rhodey’s room, two bowls on a tray, plates with grilled cheese on top of them. He set it down on Rhodey’s desk, grabbed one plate and bowl, and put them to the side so he could hand the tray to Rhodey.

“You don’t have-”

“So are we going to do this with that crappy TV in your closet or Netflix?” he asked loudly, cutting off Rhodey. If Rhodey told Tony not to do this, he’d have to stop. But Tony wanted to do this, wanted to help Rhodey.

Rhodey sighed, dipping his grilled cheese into his soup and taking a bite. He chewed slowly.

“Netflix,” he said after swallowing. Tony nodded agreeably, already half-done with his own sandwich. He popped to his feet and dug out the laptop, setting it at the foot of the bed and bringing Netflix up.

He browsed through the options for a while, before settling on Who Framed Roger Rabbit? and went back to his own cooling soup.

They were barely a half hour in when Tony decided it was time for the next step. He took the tray from Rhodey, setting all the dishes back on it, and left the room. He set them in the sink, giving them only a quick rinse so there wouldn’t be any dried soup on the bowls.

It took some searching to find the two biggest coffee mugs, but when he did he found the chocolate sauce, some vanilla extract, and milk. He couldn’t make them just like Jarvis always had - Jarvis had added peppermint candies usually, and always added some pieces of actual chocolate for additional flavor - but this was close enough for now. Rhodey’d never had a Jarvis hot chocolate, he wouldn’t know that he was missing out on actual perfection.

He made them just a little more than perfectly hot and carefully brought them back upstairs.

Rhodey had tugged a blanket onto his shoulders and was leaning back against the headboard, laptop now settled across his knees.

“What’s-”

“Hot chocolate,” Tony murmured, making sure Rhodey had a good grip on one before letting go of it. He went around to the other side of the bed, placing his mug on the bedside table before scooting closer to Rhodey and picking it up again. “Jarvis showed me how to make it. This isn’t the same, but…”

Rhodey took a sip and hummed. “It’s good, Tones. Thanks.”

Tony shrugged, hoping the warm feeling in his cheeks wasn’t from a blush.

They watched the movie, drank their hot chocolates. When the movie finished, Tony tugged the laptop into his lap, going back to the search page.

“What next, sugarbear?”

Rhodey licked his lips. “Mom has, downstairs under the TV, she has The Princess Bride.”

Tony paused. “This is supposed to be your-”

“I know,” Rhodey said. He reached out, squeezing Tony’s forearm. “But just cause it’s _your_ favorite movie doesn’t mean I don’t also enjoy it. I want to watch it with you. Like old times, yeah?” He offered a slightly forced smile.

Tony let him pretend it was convincing and smiled back. “Yeah, alright. I’ll-”

“No. I’ll go get it. You still aren’t in pajamas.”

Tony laughed, let Rhodey go downstairs and have a moment to himself if that was what he needed. He changed into his own pajamas, shivered a bit and decided to tug on Rhodey’s jacket because he _could_. Rhodey came back upstairs and actually laughed a bit.

“Now it really is just like old times,” he joked, climbing back onto the bed. He took the laptop from Tony and opened it for the DVD.

Tony rolled his eyes. “I did not steal that sweatshirt, it was mine. I left it-”

“Uh huh, keep telling everyone that,” Rhodey said dryly. “We both know it was mine.”

“No, it was definitely-”

“It was two sizes too big on you, Tony!” Rhodey laughed.

“I like my sweatshirts that big, they’re comfortable.”

Rhodey smirked. “Sure. Is that why you’re wearing my jacket?”

“I was cold, it’s warm.” Tony waved a hand at Rhodey. “Are we watching this or what?”

Rhodey rolled his eyes but settled back once again, tugging the blanket back around his shoulders. This time, though, he lifted up an arm, waiting for Tony to curl against his side.

Like old times.

Tony swallowed, because this was going to be one of those little hurts he’d been feeling almost constantly since this started, getting to have Rhodey but not really have him. But it was what they’d done on these comfort days, and it was maybe something Rhodey needed, to have someone there next to him. So Tony wiggled over and leaned against Rhodey’s side.

The arm fell over his shoulders, with the blanket, and Rhodey’s hand squeezed his upper arm where it rested.

Tony wondered if Rhodey realized that, five minutes later, he was rubbing Tony’s arm, little motions up and down that were lazy and unconscious.

He distracted himself by focusing on the movie, quoting scenes, grinning when Rhodey joined in after pretending to resist for a few minutes.

It was warm, and nice. Tony found it harder and harder to keep his eyes open, even as the movie came to his favorite part.

His head tilted farther to the side, against Rhodey’s shoulder.

~*~*~

Rhodey carefully set the laptop aside when the movie ended and peered down at Tony. His head had slipped down onto Rhodey’s chest, one arm creeping over to wrap around Rhodey.

He brushed some hair out of Tony’s face and just took a moment to look at him. Long lashes against his cheeks, lips parted slightly, no tightness or worried furrows around his eyes. His breathing was steady, little puffs of air rhythmically warming a patch of Rhodey’s shirt. Rhodey brushed a hand over Tony’s hair again. It was soft and curled around his fingers, not styled with product or grease, a rare thing.

Unthinking, he leaned down and pressed a kiss to Tony’s hair.

He paused a moment, a bit startled by how he’d just done that. Tony murmured almost soundlessly and nuzzled his face against Rhodey’s chest.

Cautiously, slowly, Rhodey shifted down the bed, keeping Tony in place with him, until they’d be more comfortable.

His arm was going to fall asleep under Tony, but that was fine. He turned slightly, into Tony, and wrapped his other arm around him as well, closing his eyes and sighing deeply.

“Thanks, Tones,” he whispered. He didn’t bother trying to reach the desk lamp; the dim light wouldn’t bother either of them, after all.

~*~*~

Rhodey couldn’t stop glancing over at Tony during breakfast.

It was getting frustrating, because he wouldn’t mean to, but he’d realize he was watching Tony and have to drag his gaze away. He’d woken up with Tony half on top of him and still asleep, head pillowed on Rhodey’s chest and fingers loosely clinging to Rhodey’s shirt. Rhodey’d started staring then, and it seemed like he couldn’t stop or something.

Tony talked with Jeanie, gesturing with the hand that wasn’t using his fork to smear pieces of waffles through the syrup on the plate. Tony made faces across the table at Lila until Mama gave them both a stern look and they stopped. Tony told Mama to “Sit down, you cooked, so I can get you more coffee” and cheerfully got up from his seat to fetch it for her. His hand had dragged over Rhodey’s shoulders absently as he retook his seat, and it sent goosebumps dancing over Rhodey’s back.

Sometime between clean up and getting dressed, Tony disappeared. Rhodey searched the house, eventually finding him in the backyard, pacing back and forth. The sky was overcast, but it wasn’t raining (yet at least).

“No, listen, I - no, I get that, but -”  Tony sighed, one hand on his hip, lips pursed. “C’mon, Obie, you know I’m right.” He made a face as he listened to whatever Obie was saying, shoulders hunching a bit. “I’m not,” he said quietly, just a hint of pleading. “I’m not trying to just - okay, but if he’d just… no. No, I know you are. Yeah. Saturday? Okay, let me know how it goes.”

“Everything okay?” Rhodey called.

Tony shot a bright smile his way, but his eyes were tight. “Yep. Things are hunky dor-”

“Tony,” he said quietly, slipping a hand around his shoulder to the back of his neck.

Sighing, Tony slumped forward, his forehead against Rhodey’s shoulder. “Obie said there’s going to be a board of directors meeting on Saturday about all of it. I didn’t want it to go that far. I just wanted to not make weapons anymore,” he said. It was the same sadly pleading tone of voice he’d gotten when Rhodey found him drunk and curled up in Rhodey’s dorm bed, desperate for affection or understanding or just plain comfort from someone he could trust.

Rhodey didn’t know what had happened to make Tony this opposed to making weapons - he’d never expressed a problem with it when they were at MIT - but he did know that whatever Tony decided to create, it’d be brilliant.

“Your dad’s an idiot,” Rhodey said simply. “You’re gonna do great things, and he’s too blind to see that he had a chance to be part of that. If the board decides to side with him, then I know you’ll figure it out.”

Tony huffed, not quite a laugh, not really believing what Rhodey was saying.

“You will. You’re more than you think you are, Tony. Always have been.”

“Getting mushy,” Tony mumbled, but he still hadn’t pulled away.

Rhodey snorted, about to retort that Tony _liked_ mushy when Roberta poked her head out and smiled at them. “I’m going to visit your dad, Rhodey, but would you mind running some errands in town for me?”

“Sure, Mama,” Rhodey said. His shoulder felt cold where Tony had pulled away. He turned back to him when the screen door closed again, feeling oddly like a moment had been lost.

“You want to come with or stay here?”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Don’t ask ridiculous questions, sugarpie. Of course I’m coming with you.”

They didn’t leave for another hour or so. The sky had started to clear up by then, and though it was cold it was a nice looking day. They did the grocery shopping, but since there was no rush to get home - no meats, nothing that needed to be frozen or stuck in the fridge immediately - decided to walk around downtown.

Tony complained about how his hands were cold until Rhodey rolled his eyes and grabbed one of Tony’s hands, shoving it into the pocket of his jacket.

“Better?” he asked.

Tony’s mouth opened and closed for a moment, before he said, “My other hand is still cold.”

Rhodey laughed. Tony glanced up at him and smiled, a little tentative and shy, but sweet and honest. Rhodey tugged him closer.

They stopped at some little cafe to eat too expensive sandwiches. Tony of course got a coffee as well, as big as he could and drank it in five minutes’ time. He seemed more cheerful after that, sort of bouncing on his toes a bit as they walked, pointing out any little shop that caught his eye. An antiques store, an old-fashioned barber shop, an ice cream parlor.

They ducked into a used bookstore Rhodey didn’t remember from last time he’d visited, poking around for a bit before leaving. The clouds had returned, the wind picking up, and Tony managed to convince Rhodey they should get more coffee.

Rhodey watched Tony bounce on his toes a bit as they waited, his cheeks still pink from the cold, looking relaxed and happy again.

He immediately took a sip of his coffee as soon as they were back outside and out of the doorway, stopping and closing his eyes to hum in delight. Rhodey stared as Tony dragged his tongue over his top lip.

Rhodey stepped forward, into Tony’s space. Tony’s head tilted up, a questioning tilt to his brows.

“Let’s get home,” Rhodey said after a moment, shaking himself out of it, slinging an arm around Tony’s shoulders. Tony nodded, both hands wrapped tightly around the to-go cup of his coffee.

“Before it starts raining on us.”

“Had to go and jinx it, didn’t you?” Rhodey sighed teasingly.

Tony snorted and nudged him with an elbow. “Maybe I wanted to see you in a soaking wet shirt again.”

Ignoring the flush of heat at that, Rhodey said dryly, “I’m wearing a jacket, Tony.”

“Obviously you’d give it to me.”

Huffing a laugh, Rhodey repeated, “Obviously. Because that would make sense, with you already having one.”

“You’re a gentleman like that,” Tony said, nodding agreeably.

They made it to the car, and home, before it started to rain again.

~*~*~

Dinner was quiet. Jeanette and Alex had taken the kids to visit some relatives of Alex’s about an hour away. Mama explained that Jeanie thought it would be good for the kids to have a day or two away from here. So it was just the three of them for dinner.

Mama turned in before they did, leaving the two of them on the couch. Rhodey was half-watching the news, half-watching Tony type away at his laptop, pausing every once in a while to chew at his lip before diving back into rapid typing.

He wanted to ask what Tony was working on, but also was content just to watch him work. Tony in the zone was amazing to watch. Rhodey’d watched when Tony worked on the bot he made for his thesis, how excited Tony was about the project. Once, he’d fallen asleep to a drunk Tony scribbling on graph paper, one of those nights he’d shown up at Rhodey’s door instead of going back to his own dorm, only to wake up the next morning to plans for a fucking plane. Fully functional plans from what Rhodey’d been able to tell.

He hadn’t been lying that morning when he told Tony he would do great things. Anyone would be able to tell just by watching Tony work.

Tony’s father should have been able to tell, should have been proud of him, but Rhodey knew that wasn’t the case. Tony’d admitted a lot to Rhodey during those nights he stayed in Rhodey’s room. That Howard had never said he loved Tony - that he didn’t think Howard even liked him - or that he was proud of Tony. That Howard had said Tony’s thesis bot was a stupid waste of time. He knew Tony didn’t think of Howard as a father - not like he did Jarvis.

Which… Rhodey realized he hadn’t heard anything about Jarvis the entire time Tony’d been here, except little things about how Jarvis had taught Tony to cook or make hot chocolates. He hoped that things were okay there.

Rhodey blinked back into focus when Tony shut the laptop and stretched. He made a dramatic moaning noise and fell over into Rhodey’s lap, slinging an arm over Rhodey’s thighs. “I’m tired, honeybear, carry me to bed.”

“You can walk your lazy ass up to bed, dork.”

Tony twisted onto his back, making a face up at Rhodey, his nose scrunching adorably and his lips pouting a little. “You’re so mean to me, gumdrop.” Tony fought off a yawn, blinking a few times after. He stretched a bit again, then reached up to pat Rhodey’s chest at an awkward angle. “Okay. Bed.”

He rolled off the couch onto his feet, waiting for Rhodey to turn the TV off and follow.

They moved around each other easily as they got ready for bed - a smooth rhythm Rhodey couldn’t pinpoint the exact origin of. Rhodey was feeling pretty tired as well when he stepped out of the bathroom to Tony pulling a sleep shirt over his head before crawling over to his side of the bed. Rhodey got in as well, checking his phone a last time in case there were any messages - but there were none.

Tony leaned over Rhodey, reaching for the bedside lamp.

“Okay,” he sighed, inches from Rhodey. His breath smelled fresh from his toothpaste. “G’night, Rhod-!” Tony made a small, muffled, surprised squeak.

It took Rhodey’s brain a second to catch up with what his body had done. Which was lean forward and catch Tony in a kiss.

It wasn’t a hard or fast kiss, but a soft one. Tony made a little sound in his throat, like a whimper, and shifted for a better angle, leaning into Rhodey, a hand resting on his shoulder for balance. Rhodey realized that not only was he kissing Tony - still soft, but deeper now - he was also holding onto Tony’s waist, fingers tight.

He was kissing Tony.

He was _kissing Tony!_

Rhodey yanked back, sucking in a sharp breath through his nose, staring with wide eyes. His lips felt… well, they felt kissed, a little tingly, a little wet. Tony blinked at him, eyes just a bit dazed, _aroused_ , and licked his lips.

Rhodey jerked over, onto the edge of the mattress, and quickly turned out the light. He lied down on his side, facing the rest of the room, and tried to get his heart to slow the fuck down.

“...Rhodey?” Tony whispered.

He sounded uncertain, vulnerable, and it made Rhodey’s chest hurt. Because he’d done that, he’d kissed Tony and now Tony sounded like he was about to be hurt and it was a mistake Rhodey should have never made.

“Rhodey, pleas-”

“Go to sleep, Tony,” Rhodey said quickly.

Tony didn’t say anything, but after a moment, Rhodey could hear him settle on his side of the bed, not against Rhodey like the night before.

Rhodey didn’t sleep for a while, mind too busy running in circles, heart still racing just a bit too fast, and lips still stubbornly tingling each time he thought about the kiss.

~*~*~

Tony woke up before Rhodey, like usual, and tried not to feel like he was sneaking out of the room. Like after a one-night stand or something, because that wasn’t what this was, but…. Well. Tony wasn’t sure what it was anymore.

He joined Roberta in the kitchen, silently grabbing the eggs sitting on the counter and starting scrambled eggs while she worked on the bacon. He focused exclusively on making the eggs right, like Jarvis had taught him. If he didn’t give it his entire attention, he’d think about Rhodey, and about last night, and-

Eggs. He needed to grab some cheese, that always made them taste better.

When the eggs were finished, Tony looked around desperately for something else to do and decided to set the table. He grabbed three plates and the utensils, turned to the table, and almost dropped them.

Rhodey was sitting there, cup of coffee in hand, scrolling through something on his phone.

Tony ignored the little voice in his head that pointed out Rhodey always made him coffee when he came down in the mornings, and hadn’t now. He swallowed it all back and instead dragged up a smile, walking over and setting the table.

“Morning, honeybear. Didn’t hear you come down, sorry.”

Rhodey grunted.

Tony quietly took a deep breath. “Did you want juice to go with-”

“No.”

“Okay.” Tony licked his lips, hovering at the table for a moment, before declaring, “I’ll just go make myself some coffee.”

He glanced back a few times. Rhodey never looked away from his phone.

When he sat down, Roberta having made their plates for them, Rhodey finally put the phone away. But he only thanked his mom with a smile before staring down at his plate and eating at a steady pace that wouldn’t allow conversation.

It was too quiet, stiff and awkward in a painfully familiar way to Tony. Meals were like this at the mansion. He hated it.

He pushed aside the thought that meals weren’t supposed to be like this at the Rhodeses’ home, that he’d _brought_ this here with him, like some kind of poison.

Rhodey finished before them and quickly excused himself. He hadn’t looked at Tony once. Roberta stared after him, frowning, worried and a bit annoyed looking. She turned to Tony and Tony just smiled and shrugged, like he didn’t know what was going on, like he wasn’t to blame here for this.

And it wasn’t like _he’d_ kissed Rhodey - well okay, he’d kissed back, but Rhodey had kissed him, what was Tony supposed to do, not kiss Rhodey that was stupid.

But he knew Rhodey didn’t like him like that. He knew, he knew it was probably some weird grief thing - hell, Tony knew all about weird grief coping strategies - so he shouldn’t have kissed back. Obviously.

But Rhodey had kissed him first, so Rhodey shouldn’t be this pissed at Tony.

Tony excused himself as well, rinsing his plate in the sink, going to the living room since Rhodey had gone back upstairs. He pulled his laptop over, deciding he might as well actually focus on work, either the plans Obie had sent him that he didn’t really want to work on, or his own plans he’d been fiddling with, since a week after Jarvis passed. Ridiculous sentiment, he was sure Howard would call it, but Tony missed Jarvis so much, his voice and advice and help… he just wanted something of it back.

Someone to actually give a fuck about what he was doing.

The program would have to be similar to Dum-E but far more advanced. All the little things that made Dum-E quirky but ineffective would have to be ironed out, and it’d need to be _incredibly_ advanced, able to adapt and synthesize new knowledge to adjust behavior….

Tony hardly noticed when someone set a coffee down at the table for him, didn’t notice when a sandwich was placed there, didn’t notice when Rhodey stomped downstairs and left the house, or when he came back.

Didn’t notice that Roberta stopped him in the middle of the staircase and had a sharp, whispered conversation.

He did notice when his shoulder was jostled roughly, startling him enough that he jerked away, staring over with wide eyes.

Rhodey scowled. “Put it away, Mama said dinner’s ready.”

Tony blinked a few times, trying to switch gears from code to this. “Okay. Thanks,” he offered.

Nodding stiffly, Rhodey turned for the kitchen.

He saved his work, then Tony went to join them, finding everything already made and the table set, which made him feel just a bit guilty.

“Sorry Roberta,” he said. “I was working on some coding, sometimes I get… focused.”

She laughed, reaching over to cup his cheek for a moment. “Honey, I’ve been making dinner on my own for years. I won’t say the help hasn’t been nice, but don’t go feeling bad that you took a day to get some of your own work done.”

He smiled, just a little one that felt more like a twitch than anything.

Jarvis and Roberta would have gotten along, he thought. He wished they could have met.

Dinner was as awkward as breakfast, though not as quiet. Roberta tried to make conversation, and Tony participated except it felt like any time he spoke Rhodey just became more upset. So Tony stopped replying so much, and Roberta turned her focus more onto Rhodey, who gave terse, short answers.

Finally, she made an impatient noise. “Okay. Well I’m going to go visit your father, then, and when I come back you two better have spoken about whatever it is that needs talking about.”

Tony wanted to protest, but who was he kidding - it was obvious. He felt somewhat ashamed though, that this was causing Roberta to feel frustrated and upset. She was suffering enough of those kinds of emotions with her husband being sick, she didn’t need Tony adding to it.

He sat at the table, as did Rhodey, while Roberta put away the leftovers and put the dishes to soak in the sink. She gave them a last look before she left, shaking her head and sighing.

It was dead silent.

“Rhodey…”

“Sorry,” Rhodey said. He sounded stiff and awkward, but when Tony looked up at him, he looked determined. “Didn’t mean to….” He sighed sharply, rubbing his hands over his hair. “We’ll go back to pretending tomorrow, okay? Tonight just… I need space.”

Tony swallowed past the lump in his throat and nodded. “Yeah,” he said hoarsely. “Okay. We should probably-”

“Do you want the bedroom?”

For a moment, Tony just closed his eyes. Then he brought up a smile and shrugged at Rhodey. “I’m probably going to keep working on the code, so I’ll just stay down here. I’ll be up pretty late.”

“Right. See you tomorrow then,” Rhodey said, pushing his chair back and leaving the kitchen.

Tony waited until he heard the door upstairs close before slumping forward and resting his forehead on the table. “Fuck,” he sighed. He let himself wallow for a little longer before getting up and returning to the couch and laptop.

He was up until almost five the next morning, until the code blurred in front of his eyes. He could have kept going, especially if he made himself some coffee and perhaps a snack - brain food is important when doing so much work - but he didn’t want to see Roberta looking worried or disappointed or something. So he shut the laptop, grabbed the afghan on the back of the couch that was for decoration more than warmth, and pulled it over himself.

He didn’t fall asleep for another hour.

~*~*~

Rhodey came downstairs feeling somewhat better - more settled. So he’d kissed Tony, but it’d been… nothing, it hadn’t meant anything, of course, and they’d just ignore it and keep pretending to be engaged and then go their separate ways.

Maybe not completely separate, of course. Rhodey enjoyed having Tony around again, wanted to keep being friends.

They just had to get through all of this and it’d be _fine_.

He walked into the kitchen and froze when his mama shot him a sharp look.

She placed a finger to her lip and Rhodey frowned, confused. Mama didn’t offer any answers, just went back to quietly chopping fruit. Rhodey went to the coffee machine and began to make a cup. For a moment, he hesitated, but it’d be best to go back to acting normal - _pretend_ normal, he meant - so he pulled down a second cup for Tony.

Who wasn’t in the kitchen, which was kind of abnormal. Tony was almost always in the kitchen by this point.

Mama set a bowl of chopped strawberries and bananas on the table, then two bowls, milk, and cereal. Really simple, and with only two bowls. Rhodey felt an odd moment of panic.

“Where’s Tony?” he asked.

She gave him an exasperated look. “He’s still sleeping. I got home about midnight last night and he was up - honestly, I don’t know if he got much sleep last night, and we should leave him be,” she whispered firmly.

Rhodey hesitated before sitting down. “I’m just gonna….”

Mama’s face softened and she offered him a little smile. Rhodey crept into the living room and peered over the back of the couch. Tony was curled up, face pressed towards the back of the couch and a clear frown on his face. Rhodey could see the circles under his eyes, knew Tony’s habits enough to bet that he had been up till a couple hours past Mama got home. Rhodey sighed, resisted the urge to reach down and stroke his fingers through Tony’s hair, and went back to the kitchen.

He spoke quietly with Mama - not about Dad, but about how Jeanette was supposed to be back with the kids and Alex later that evening, about normal things.

When Tony still hadn’t gotten up after breakfast, Rhodey heated the coffee and set it on the coffee table in front of the couch. He helped Mama with some chores outside that hadn’t been done - the fence gate was loose, the lawn needed to be mowed, the walkway swept, the garden weeded - and came back inside around lunchtime to wash up.

Tony was sitting up on the couch, staring blankly at the screen of the laptop. The coffee on the table was empty.

Rhodey peered around, but Mama was still outside. He leaned against the back of the couch.

“Hey. You still okay to do this?”

Tony glanced at him and nodded. He didn’t look okay, though. He looked run down, resigned, so damned unhappy it made Rhodey’s heart literally ache.

Frowning, Rhodey said, “Seriously, if you don’t-”

“Are you?” Tony snapped aggressively. Rhodey held up his hands and took a step back. He didn’t get a chance to say anything as Tony immediately slumped forward, tangling his fingers in his hair. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean… I’m sorry. The code, it’s just-” He growled. “It’s not working how I need it to.”

Rhodey was sure it wasn’t just the code bothering Tony. But he also knew that if Tony didn’t want to admit what else it was - Rhodey had a good idea, anyway, because what else _could_ it be? - there would be no getting anything out of him without a lot of work and possibly some shouting.

“C’mon. Take a break. Eat some lunch, maybe watch some crappy TV. You’re not going to figure something out by pushing yourself too hard.”

Tony mumbled something, but got to his feet and followed Rhodey into the kitchen. They had everything out for sandwiches when Mama came inside. It looked like everything was back on track, and Rhodey relaxed.

Until Tony’s hand landed on his shoulder when he stretched past Rhodey to grab something. Rhodey stiffened, almost taking a step back.

It didn’t get better from there.

Every time Tony touched Rhodey, Rhodey reacted. Stupidly, obviously. He twitched, he stiffened, he even side-stepped an oncoming touch a few times. Because when Tony touched him, it made Rhodey hyperaware of each point of contact, each millimeter of skin that connected.

It reminded Rhodey of how warm Tony’s skin had felt through his sleep shirt the other night. And of how soft Tony’s lips were, contrasted by the light scratch of facial hair.

Thinking about that only made Rhodey stare at Tony’s lips. Tony went back to the code after a few hours, and he’d chew or bite his lip when he got stuck for a moment, before working through it and bending over, typing quickly.

Tony’s fingers were almost as distracting as his lips. They were long and dexterous. Rhodey knew, because he’d seen Tony at work, with machines, once with a piano. (Tony had been particularly wasted then, and masterfully, unexpectedly good at playing. He’d also broken down sobbing when he finished, leaving Rhodey frantic.) Tony’s hands were also just a little rough, not soft, and they made Rhodey’s skin tingle when Tony reached over to touch his hand at one point.

He’d snatched his hand away, ignored the way Tony stared at him, looking frustrated.

By the time Jeanie and her family were back, Tony was scowling and Rhodey was trying to keep distance between them both. He hadn’t expected it to be quite so difficult to not think about it, about the kiss, about _Tony_ and it didn’t seem like Tony planned on backing off.

Which should have been good because they had to keep up the facade, but… well, Rhodey just couldn’t help it.

He was feeling oddly jumpy around Tony.

It didn’t get better even as they finally turned in for the night, going up to their room. Even though Tony didn’t say a word to him, just climbed on the other side of the bed and curled up with his back to Rhodey, Rhodey felt hyperaware of Tony being so close. Of the last time they’d been in the bed together. Of the memory of that kiss.

He had to get over this.

~*~*~

It was obvious to everyone that something was going on. Tony kept trying to keep the charade going, but Rhodey was dodging any touch, alternately jumpy and irritated about it. Even Ben had noticed, because Thursday afternoon he’d tugged at Tony’s shirt and asked him quietly if Uncle Jim was mad at Tony.

Everyone was noticing, everyone was _watching_ them now, closely. At some point, they were going to slip, or someone was going to start _wondering_.

They had to work this out, soon.

Friday went just as awfully as the previous couple days, though there were a few hours in the afternoon where Tony watched the kids with Roberta and Alex while Rhodey and Jeanette visited Terrence. Tony waited until everyone else went to visit Terrence again after dinner before doing something about it. It was just him and Rhodey, the kids asleep upstairs.

No one to hear it if they brought up the fact that this whole fucking thing wasn’t _real_ anyway.

Rhodey tried to duck out of the room when Tony sat next to him. Tony had had enough.

“Sit the fuck down and stop acting like I’m going to jump you, Rhodes!”

“I am not-”

“You are! You won’t be alone in a room with me! You won’t let me touch you - and you sure as hell have made sure not to touch me! God, Ben asked if you were mad at me the other day, even the kids can see something’s wrong!”

“Couples fight, it-”

“Sure, but we’re not a couple, are we?” Tony spat. “You made that clear.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Rhodey snapped, glaring at Tony. “ _I_ made it clear?”

“You kissed me,” Tony said, lifting his chin. “You kissed me and freaked.”

“I did not _freak_ ,” Rhodey denied. “I just made sure we were on the same page.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Right. That we’ll just pretend it never happened and go on acting like a couple. Except you keep freaking out, so we can’t even do that!”

“I told you, couples fight! Fuck Tony, I know your longest relationship lasted about three weeks, but even then I figured you’d know that much! Or have you never stuck around for that part? Just run any time things get hard with people, huh?”

“And what’s _that_ supposed to mean?” Tony demanded. “How is this suddenly on me?”

“Any time people aren’t _easy_ for you anymore, you run. You always have.”

“That’s not-”

“You did it with me, right? What made it too hard for you to put any effort into being friends anymore?”

Tony clenched his jaw. “That’s not what-”

Rhodey scoffed. “Sure it isn’t. I know Mama tried to get you to talk to me after Todd, but you never did. Too much work?”

“Oh yeah? I never heard a word about it from you!” Tony snapped. “Can’t have missed or needed me too much. I’d probably still not know what happened except that you two broke up, except Alex let slip about some Dear John letter. What? Did _Todd_ not want to put in the effort with you anymore?”

“Shut the fuck up!”

“Then don’t make me out to be that asshole-”

“He left me for someone else, Tony! At least _he_ had the fucking decency to give me a fucking reason and good bye! You _just left!_ You never fucking have given me a reason why, and I’ve not asked for one even though I goddamn deserve it!”

Tony ground his teeth, swallowed and took a deep breath. They were getting off track, heading towards things Tony didn’t think he wanted to admit to Rhodey. Rhodey didn’t need to know that Tony hadn’t been able to stick around and watch Rhodey get a happily ever after with someone else. He hadn’t been able to trust that he’d hide how in love with Rhodey he was then.

Hell, he was probably doing an awful job at it now, even. He needed to keep his own feelings in check if he was to help Rhodey with this pretend engagement, like he’d promised he would. “Listen, I just wanted to talk about the kiss.” He licked his lips, glancing at Rhodey uncertainly. It was stupid to ask, but he had to know. “Why did you-”

“I don’t know!” Rhodey shouted. “But it was a fucking mistake!”

Tony sucked in a breath. It hurt. It shouldn’t, he’d known that was what Rhodey must think of it, but it _hurt_ to hear. “A mistake.”

“ _Yes_.”

“I… I don’t think….” Tony tried to scramble for something to say, past the hurt he was feeling, something that wouldn’t give away how he felt, but he was failing.

“No, you never fucking think!” Rhodey snapped, throwing his hands up. “You just fucking react, just do whatever the hell you want without thinking about how it’s going to affect or hurt others! You always have, I know because I had to fucking pick up the pieces half the time!”

Tony flinched. “I never asked-”

“Of course you didn’t!” Rhodey scoffed. “You just expected it! You always expect people to just do shit for you. Me, Obie, Jarvis.”

“So why are you so pissed I left, huh?” Tony snapped. “If I was such a shitty friend, why are you so pissed? Why did you kiss me then?”

“I said I don’t know! Drop it!”

“I think you do know,” Tony taunted, walking closer, into Rhodey’s space. His heart was pounding in his chest, from the fight, from what he was about to maybe do. It was reckless and stupid, he knew that, he knew it wouldn’t end well but he couldn’t stop himself. “I think you want me.”

“I told you it was a mistake! Kissing you was a fucking mistake, Tony!”

Taking a deep breath - past the pain and for courage - Tony admitted firmly, “I don’t think it was.”

Rhodey just scoffed, rolling his eyes and turning to leave. Tony followed after him, catching his arm at the foot of the stairs and stepping forward, into Rhodey’s chest.

“Tony,” Rhodey said warningly.

Tony ignored it, leaning forward to kiss him. He didn’t go so fast that Rhodey couldn’t have turned away, he wasn’t holding so tightly Rhodey couldn’t pull away. He didn’t move away, didn’t say no, didn’t _pull back when Tony kissed him_.

Tony licked his lips. “I think you want me,” he repeated quietly after a moment. “I think this has been getting a little more real than you expected and it scares you.”

“Jesus, Tony.” Rhodey yanked back, rubbing a hand over his face. “I don’t fucking _want_ you. I thought I made it clear back in college - I’ve never fucking _wanted you!_ This _isn’t_ real, hell, at the rate Dad’s going I’m only going to have to keep faking it for another couple months, maybe not even that. My dad is _dying_ ,” he said, voice choking. “And you’ve gotta make this all about you, about fucking sex?” Shaking his head, Rhodey turned to go upstairs. “God, I’m starting to regret ever having asked you to come here with me,” he heard Rhodey mutter.

Tony stood there, looking around the room and refusing to blink, to admit that Rhodey’s words hurt. It was his own fault. He’d dared to try putting himself out there when he knew - he _knew_ \- that Rhodey didn’t want him like that, love him like that. He knew, and he’d selfishly pushed, like Rhodey said. He’d brought this on himself.

He’d just… he’d been so happy around Rhodey again, even when it hurt, and then Rhodey had kissed him and he’d thought… maybe….

Stupid.

Tony went into the kitchen, stretching to reach the cabinet above the sink, where he’d seen Jeanette and Alex stash a bottle of whiskey the other night. He’d buy them something better to replace it.

~*~*~

Jeanie and Alex immediately went upstairs, both stumbling with exhaustion. Terrence had been in a lot of pain, more forgetful. He’d forgotten Alex’s name, kept asking where Rhodey went, had stared blankly for a few endless moments when Jeanette mentioned her kids.

Roberta turned into the kitchen, thinking that a drink wouldn’t be entirely amiss, and froze.

Tony was sitting at the table, apparently having had a similar idea if the half-empty whiskey bottle was any indication. His eyes were red and glassy - and not from the alcohol, Roberta could tell. That was from crying, the kind that left someone empty and apathetic. _That_ coupled with the drinking made her nervous.

She went and grabbed herself a small glass. Tony didn’t even seem to register she was in the kitchen, didn’t blink when she took a seat across from him.

“Honey? What happened?”

Tony, holding the bottle by the neck, shrugged and turned it so the edge of the bottom rolled along the table, circling over and over. “Rhodey and I yelled at each other.”

Roberta rolled some words around in her head before speaking. “It’s stressful now for all of us,” she said with a sigh. “And unfortunately we usually take it out on the people we love.”

Tony made a soft, bitter sound. He didn’t believe her, for some reason, so she reached out and took the bottle from him. She poured some into her glass before firmly setting the bottle in reach of both of them.

“When Jeanie was little, she got pretty sick. Terrence and I were so worried, and I was trying so hard not to let on to Rhodey how serious it was. I took a lot of it out on Terrence. But I still loved him, of course.” She reached over and grabbed his hand. “Rhodey still loves you, he’s just scared and hurting. You’ll get through this and be stronger for it.”

“Doesn’t matter. He’s never going to forgive me for leaving, you know. I thought he had, but he’s not. He won’t.”

“Honey, he was just lashing out. He never said anything bad about you losing contact with us. Jeanie was more upset than him, and-”

“He deserves a better friend than me.”

Roberta paused. “Tony, he loves you. Deserving has nothing-”

“Stop _saying that!”_ Tony snapped, slamming his hands on the table. He sucked in a breath, sharp and unsteady, and dragged his hands through his hair. “ _Please_ ,” he begged. “Stop saying that, please.”

She stared at him, feeling a horrible dread. She’d thought… but it was looking like Terrence had seen something she hadn’t. Or maybe she hadn’t wanted to see it.

“He’s asked you to marry him, Tony, of course he-”

“It’s _not real_ ,” Tony blurted, voice cracking. “It’s never been real. He doesn’t love me, we’re not engaged, he doesn’t want me like that. He doesn’t.” He looked up at her, looking so very upset and defeated. “He’s never wanted me.”

“Tony, honey-”

“But I love him,” Tony croaked. “Roberta, I love him so… so much. For years, I’ve…. I didn’t think I could stand to see him marry someone else, love them like that, so I left. Just like he said, it was too much effort so I ran away, but he looked so sad in the airport and I missed everyone, so I came, but it was a mistake, just like he said, I should never have come here, I…” He gasped, quick and hitching like he couldn’t breathe.

Roberta got up and quickly came around the table, crouching down to wrap Tony in her arms. He clung to her, muffling a sob against her shoulder.

“I thought I could do this but I can’t. I can’t do this anymore. It hurts, it just constantly hurts, like when Jarvis died but worse. He doesn’t love me, he-” Tony’s breath hitched again. “He needed me to do this for him, after all he’s done for me I thought I could but I _can’t anymore_.”

Roberta made a soothing noise, rubbing up and down Tony’s back. Before she could reassure him, though, he pulled back, staring desperately. “You can’t tell him. You can’t tell him you know it’s fake, he just wants his dad to be happy. I-I can still pretend to be… but not here. I need… I can’t do this anymore, but please don’t tell him you know the truth. Don’t tell anyone. Please.”

“Tony,” she said, feeling slightly devastated. “Oh, Tony, it’s not-”

“Please,” Tony begged.

Roberta sighed, brushing hair off his forehead. “Okay Tony. I won’t tell Rhodey I know.”

She managed to get Tony out of the kitchen and to the couch. She sat there with his head in her lap, a blanket wrapped around him, and stroked his hair. A few times he started quietly crying again, shoulders shaking with hitching breaths.

“He does love you, Tony,” she whispered. “Don’t think he doesn’t love you.”

Tony just shook his head, too tired to argue.

Roberta sat there until Tony fell asleep, and then for a little while after. She wondered if Tony would still be there in the morning if she went to bed.

~*~*~

It was quiet the next morning. Breakfast was subdued - Jeanette tried to act okay for her kids, but she was still upset from the previous night. Tony pushed his food around his plate, eyes faraway and blank. Rhodey wouldn’t look at anyone. He felt conflicted; he was still angry, but also felt a little guilty for yelling at Tony the other night. He knew he’d said some things that he shouldn’t have.

The most noise came from Lila, who was telling Roberta about a toy she’d seen on TV that she just had to have for her birthday, which was four months away.

Rhodey decided to visit his Dad, Jeanie volunteering to come with him. He could tell she didn’t want to go, but when he let her know she didn’t have to, she gave him a stubborn look.

Tony was sitting on the couch on the laptop again when Rhodey left.

His dad was in and out for the couple hours they visited. When he was awake, he wasn’t fully aware; mostly he slept, so around lunch Jeanie suggested they leave and visit tomorrow. Give Dad a day where he didn’t have to feel like he needed to interact with them because they were visiting, so he could actually get some rest and strength back, maybe.

Rhodey felt drained himself from the visit, even though he’d been sitting in a chair and hardly spoken the whole time. He didn’t think he’d want to stay in the house - or at least, downstairs. The idea of interacting with his niece and nephew, with Alex and Mama and Jeanie, was too much, too exhausting to even think about.

Maybe he could just have another day in bed with Tony and Netflix, watching corny movies together. It’d been nice, when Tony had done that with him, helped him feel more like he could face the next day.

He stopped on the way home to get coffee - mostly as an apology for Tony, and maybe a bit as a means of buttering him up to spending so much of the day alone with Rhodey when he’d been a dick yesterday. The past few days, if Rhodey was being honest.

Tony wasn’t on the couch where Rhodey had last seen him. He glanced in the kitchen, then outside where Mama and Alex were watching the kids play.

“Hey, Mama,” he said, glancing away when Jeanette leaned down and hugged Alex, holding on for a long moment. “You know where Tony is?”

Mama pursed her lips and glanced away, pushing to her feet and heading back inside. Rhodey followed, shifting his grip on the coffees in his hand.

“I got him a coffee, thought he might-”

“He left.”

For a moment, Rhodey stood there with his mouth open, like he’d stalled when hearing the words. “I… I don’t - what?”

Mama sighed, leaning back against the kitchen counter. There was a small frown on her face, her crossed arms doing nothing to hide how the fingers of one hand tapped against her side. “Tony left about an hour and a half after you and Jeanie headed out. Said he had to go back home for business, apologized for leaving.”

“I…” Rhodey frowned. “I didn’t get a call or text from him….”

“His phone died - he was on it a lot, talking to someone. Arguing, it sounded like. He told me to let you know, was out the door before I could say much of anything.”

Rhodey shook his head. “He…” He shouldn’t have any business to take care of, Rhodey wanted to say. His asshole father had kicked him out. But Tony _had_ said that Obadiah was helping with that; maybe he’d gotten something worked out and needed Tony pronto…?

Rhodey looked down at the extra - useless - coffee in his hand and slowly set it on the counter. Numbly, he went upstairs, glancing around his bedroom once he’d shut the door behind himself.

Tony’s things were gone - cleared away so completely that Rhodey wouldn’t have known he’d ever been there if he was anyone else. There was no sign that Tony’d been living with Rhodey for over a month now. No sign, but to Rhodey it felt emptier. _He_ felt emptier, like he’d just lost something.

He grabbed his phone, sitting heavily on the edge of the bed. Tony’s phone rang and rang and rang and went to voicemail. Rhodey thought - but maybe it had charged, maybe Tony - but if he was on a plane, it shouldn’t have rang, right?

Well, it depended on if Tony was there yet, or maybe at a layover, or maybe it was a drive instead of a flight.

“Hey man. Call me, let me know what’s up.”

He hung up, lowering the phone slowly.

He didn’t want to go back downstairs. Felt like he had even less energy to interact with his family now, than he’d had before hearing Tony had left without a word. He didn’t want to have to pretend he was okay with Tony being gone when he was feeling anything but okay.

Well, he could still curl up in bed and watch movies, right?

Rhodey didn’t; he curled up and stared at the wall until he managed to fitfully doze off.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I give you the last chapter, the chapter that didn't-want-to-end. ;)  
> I hope you all enjoy it.

Obie met Tony at the airport, slinging a heavy arm over his shoulder and yanking him close. He was grinning cheerfully, saying how much he’d missed Tony. Tony nodded and smiled, but his mind was elsewhere.

Roberta had tried to talk him out of going - or at least into waiting until Rhodey got back and letting him know where Tony was going - but he couldn’t. He couldn’t face Rhodey, he was a damned coward and Rhodey was right, Tony ran when things got too hard.

So yeah, he’d run from Rhodey and that pain, but he would be damned if he kept running from this, from putting in the effort into fixing whatever he could of his professional life. He had little hope for fixing things, but… Obie said he’d managed to get Howard to compromise.

“It’s taken me a while, but if you agree to working on one major weapon a year and doing a few meet and greets with your old man, then he’ll let you have more of a leash the rest of the time.”

Tony cast Obie a skeptical look. “He agreed to that.”

Obie held open the limousine door, waiting for Tony to get in before following. The driver closed the door and made his way around it, and Obie answered, “Don’t worry, Tony, I’ve got it all worked out so everyone ends up getting what they want.”

“Alright,” Tony sighed, leaning his head against the window. “When do I have to face him again?”

“Well, you’re welcome to stay over at my place. I only promised him I’d get you here in time for the plane heading overseas. It leaves in two days. Give you some time to prepare, yeah?” Obie said with a chuckle.

Tony smiled faintly. “Thanks, Obie.”

“Think nothing of it, my boy.”

Obie had one of those fancy penthouse apartments in the heart of the city. From the living room windows, Tony could see Stark Tower, proud and polished. He stood there staring at it for a long few minutes, anxious and relieved. He _wanted_ to keep working at SI. He wanted to manage to find a way to get along with his dad, professionally at least. Howard wasn’t easy to please, but Tony managed it sometimes with projects….

He supposed Jarvis had been right when he said he could still see that young boy that just wanted to be loved when he looked at Tony. That young boy had wanted nothing more than his father’s praise, approval, affection.

If they could really make this compromise work… if Tony could keep his dad happy with just a weapon a year, get the chance to show him what SI could _do_ outside of the weapons industry….

God, they could do such amazing things, change the world, and _blow the competition out of the water_ while doing it.

Briefly, Tony considered calling Howard before they had to meet for the demo. He discarded it almost immediately. They’d end up fighting, again, and then Howard would back out of the agreement, and Tony would be back at where he started.

“What do you feel like for dinner, Tony?” Obie asked with a grin, reaching out for the take-out menus on the hallway table near the door. “I think having the prodigal son return home deserves a bit of celebration.”

Tony turned away from the window, walking over to Obie, hands pushed deep in his jacket pockets.

That is… Rhodey’s jacket pockets. Whatever. Tony hadn’t _meant_ to steal it, honest.

But since he had… well, he was obviously a masochist because this wasn’t going to help him get over Rhodey rejecting him, but whatever.

“I wasn’t gone that long,” Tony stated. “That hardly qualifies me as a prodigal son.”

Obie chuckled, slinging an arm around Tony’s shoulders and reeling him in to his side. “Tony, my boy, this really does call for celebration. This is the start of a new chapter of our lives, now that you’re here.”

Tony scrounged up a grin, glancing over and up at Obie. “Alright. You’ve convinced me. I want cheeseburgers.”

Obie laughed, rolling his eyes. “I’ll see what I can do,” he said dryly. Tony grinned, slipping out from under Obadiah’s arm, and went back to the window, picking his bag up off the floor.

“I’ll see myself to my room, shall I?” he teased, grinning when Obie waved him off with a smile and another fond eye roll.

Tony knew where the guest room was - he’d stayed often enough at Obie’s place over the years. It was at the end of the hall, right across from Obie’s office, had its own bathroom attached. Tony tossed his bag aside and fell onto the bed, curling up on his side. After a moment, he dug his phone out of his pants pocket, considering the notification that he had a missed call and voicemail.

From Rhodey.

Tony swallowed, licked his lips quickly, and deleted it.

Sucking in a sharp, deep breath, Tony flung his phone onto the bedside table and twisted to face the other way.

~*~*~

Tony found sleep hard to achieve, once he finally went to bed after eating burgers and drinking scotch with Obie for a while. After a few hours tossing and turning, he picked up his tablet and went back to work on his personal project, fiddling with the code. It had to be just right….

At some point, he did finally sleep. When he woke up, it was mid-morning. He showered, brushed his teeth to get rid of the slightly fuzzy post-alcohol feeling, and poked his head out into the hall.

Obie’s door was open, but the apartment was silent.

Tony stepped into the hall, the wood chilly against his bare feet. He poked his head into Obie’s office and was somewhat relieved to find him there; he didn’t really like the idea of being alone, too used to the noise of Rhodey’s home after so many weeks there.

Obie smiled, holding up a finger and finishing up a phone call. He sat back, satisfied, after it was over and folded his hands over his chest. “So, my boy, I’ve got some files here about the Jericho - why don’t you brush up on it, so your old man has nothing to get on your case about after tomorrow.”

Tony grimaced. “Coffee first.”

Laughing, Obie got up, bringing one of the files with him. He didn’t hand it to Tony, just slung an arm around Tony’s shoulders and directed him out of the office and down the hall. He let Tony go at the bar counter, setting the file down, and went to make two cups of coffee.

“Let’s make it Irish Coffees,” Obie said, winking as he poured fairly generous amounts of whiskey in as well. Tony smiled a bit. Coffee was coffee after all, and he definitely needed it. He sipped, carefully keeping a grimace off his face. Obie had made it plenty strong, both coffee and alcohol wise, and Tony supposed he’d gotten used to the sweeter coffee at the Rhodes’ home.

For a moment, he let himself feel the pain and longing, then pushed it aside, focusing instead of the folder.

“So after the demo, is Dad going to have a contract or something about this compromise you worked out?”

“Yes, Tony,” Obie sighed. Tony glanced up, feeling a little guilty when Obie rubbed his eyes tiredly. “I’ve got lawyers working on this for me already. I promise, I’ll have it all taken care of by the time you two get back. Just focus on this for now,” he said, tapping the file.

“Okay, sure thing,” Tony agreed.

He spent the day reading up on the Jericho, on the past few meetings with these guys his dad had attended, the last couple of purchases the military had made in the same vein as the new missile. When that started to make him irritable, he switched over to his personal project, settling in front of the window and with his laptop.

Tony wasn’t sure what Obie did - it was Sunday, so he probably wasn’t at SI, but he wasn’t in the house either. By the time he returned (with pizza) Tony had switched back to the Jericho files. There was something teasing at his mind, though he couldn’t figure it out. He wasn’t sure he wanted to; it might be a flaw, but it might also be some fucking improvement his mind was thinking up, and Tony didn’t want to make weapons anymore.

Obie showed up for dinner but went to have it in his office, leaving Tony to pick at his and fiddle with his project.

His phone ringing startled him, sending his heart racing with nervous hope - which was stupid he knew it, and if it was Rhodey he shouldn’t be answering anyway because-

It was Pepper.

“You stupid lovesick idiot,” Tony muttered, pressing to answer and wedging his cell between his shoulder and ear so he could keep working.

“Hey, Pepper-pie, what’s up?”

“Tony,” she said, slightly exasperated but he could hear the grin she was probably sporting. “You’re supposed to call me when you end up scheduling things like going overseas for a weapons demonstration.”

“Obie-”

“Also, as your _friend_ , you’re supposed to tell me when you’re back!” Tony’s lips twitched as she asked, “Where are you? Have you had dinner yet?”

“Obie’s been feeding me, no worries,” he said, setting aside the tablet and leaning back. “I’m sorry,” he added. She was right, he should have let her know he was back.

“Wow,” she teased. “An apology? Are we sure that we got Tony back and not an imposter?”

Rolling his eyes, Tony said, “Very funny, Ms. Potts.”

“Did someone teach you _manners?_ ” she continued. “I need to send them flowers, where did you go?”

“Nowhere,” Tony said. Even he could tell it was sharper than it should have been and he winced. “Ah… nowhere important.”

“Right. Obviously.” She sighed, and Tony could hear the switch from friend to employee, which made him frown a little. “Your flight is scheduled for eight in the morning, day after tomorrow. Will Obadiah be providing you a ride there, or should I arrange for Happy to come get you?”

“Pep…” Tony sighed, closing his eyes. “Obie’s not going to be seeing us off, so Happy please.”

“I’ll get in touch with him. Will that be all Mr. Stark?” She waited, and when he didn’t reply after several seconds, asked, “Tony?”

“I…” Pepper was really his only friend, in some ways. His best friend, and right now he just wanted....

“Tony?” she repeated, soft, gentle. “Why don’t we go out for drinks? Your treat, since you didn’t call and let me know you were back.”

It was perfect, and he knew what she was doing, giving him an excuse for needing her company right then, but he’d take it.

“If you insist, Pep,” he said. “Thirty minutes?”

“I can do that,” she laughed. “Usual place?”

“Definitely.”

Their usual place was high end enough that no one bothered them, but not so much so that it would be crowded or they’d likely find any of Howard’s friends or business partners there. Pepper loved the fries they served, and Tony loved their burgers, so they split a meal to go with their drinks.

Pepper leaned forward after their second round of drinks, her hand landing near his - but not on top of it, which Tony appreciated.

“Are you nervous about the demo?”

He grimaced. “Not really,” he said, giving a smile of thanks to the server when she delivered their third round. “Maybe a bit about seeing Howard, but…” He sighed, shrugging and glancing at Pepper. “Not much I can do there, and not like I expect much to change.”

She sighed, reaching out to squeeze his hand. “You’re brilliant, Tony, and I just know that if you can get him to cave only a little, he’ll see just how much you can do for the company.”

“Thanks, Pep.” He slung back his shot.

“Have you had enough alcohol to tell me where you were for the past month?”

Tony snorted, coughing as a bit of his drink went down the wrong way. He gave Pepper a wry, amused look, sipping his glass of water to clear his throat. She waited, delicately holding her own shot glass by the rim, between two fingers.

“Give me another two shots and I might be,” Tony said, only partly joking. Pepper laughed, slammed back her shot, and signaled the server.

“Double the usual this time,” she said, and turned to smile at Tony when the server left.

“Efficient,” Tony teased, which made Pepper smirk.

The moment they’d downed the fifth shot, Pepper leaned forward, eyes sharp on him - Tony leaned back a bit, eyeing her.

“So. Where were you, Mr. Stark?”

“Still on this side of the country,” he hedged. Pepper’s expression turned unimpressed, so he added, “Pennsylvania.”

“What’s in Pennsylvania?” Pepper asked. She picked up one of the remaining fries from the plate and pointed it at him. “And no bullshit, Mr. Stark.”

Tony paused. When Pepper’s expression started to soften, he quickly reached over and plucked the fry from her fingers, grinning at the scowl on her face. “An old college buddy.” He leaned back, signaling the server, trying so hard to make it appear like the answer didn’t matter.

But this _was_ Pepper, who was his best friend, and so she saw right through it.

“An old college buddy.” She raised a brow. “Elaborate.”

Tony sighed, waited until another round of shots was brought and quickly drank it. “Rhodey was kind of my only friend before you. And I stopped talking to him about a year before I met you.”

“Why’d you stop talking?”

“He was getting married,” Tony muttered. He glanced away when Pepper’s eyes widened, her lips parting into a silent ‘oh’.

“And you loved him.”

After a moment, Tony nodded. Pepper slid her shot over to him and with a soft breath of laughter, Tony toasted her and drank it, too.

“So why - how did you end up there, then?”

“He was at the airport. We… talked.” Tony pushed the shot glass between his hands. “His dad’s dying,” he added quietly. “I used to… visit. For breaks and stuff. Once a whole summer.”

Pepper placed her hand on his forearm. “I’m sorry, Tony. That must have been-”

“He asked me to pretend to be engaged,” he said quickly, uncomfortable with Pepper’s sympathy. Tony hadn’t spoken to them in five years, his own fault, and he didn’t want or deserve sympathy because Terrence was sick, was dying. Rhodey did, the Rhodes did, but not Tony.

_“What.”_

“He… he told his dad he was engaged, asked me to play along. His dad really wants - and it was only going to be for a few months, really, so - and he’s always helped me out, so I just wanted….”

“Jesus, Tony.”

Tony hunched over a bit, blinking glassy eyes at the table. It was the alcohol, not tears.

“I fucked it up, though, Pep. He’d had an awful day and he’d been so stressed and he kissed me, I kissed him back, he… he told me that it was a mistake, but I pushed, I fucked it up and-” He sucked in a breath, pretending it wasn’t as wet as it sounded. “He told me he’d never wanted me - which I knew, I should have known better… I just… was stupid.”

“If he kissed you, I think you have every right to think things might have changed.” Pepper had scooted closer and her hand rubbed up and down his back consolingly. “You’re not stupid for that.”

He turned his head, dropping it onto Pepper’s shoulder. “He said he regretted bringing me,” he whispered. “And then I accidentally let it slip to his mom…. I just… I didn’t want to stay anymore.”

She pulled him into a strong side-hug. “You shouldn’t have to. I’m glad you came back instead of staying there.”

Tony sniffed. “Obie had good timing, I guess.” He closed his eyes when he felt Pepper press a soft kiss to his head. “It hurts, but I miss him.”

“I know,” she said quietly. They were quiet for a moment, Pepper holding him close, fingers playing lightly with the hair at the back of his neck.

“Does he know you love him?”

“I don’t know,” Tony whispered back. “I don’t think I’ve been very good at hiding it. I told him I didn’t think the kiss was a mistake. I…” He pulled back, scrubbing at his face briskly. “I don’t want to talk about it,” he said firmly.

“Okay,” Pepper said quietly. “How about we get you back home?”

“Stay,” he blurted. “Please?”

Her nose scrunched, just a bit. “I hate Obie’s place,” she sighed. Before Tony could brush off his stupid pleading, though, she added, “You can come back to my apartment, though.”

He slumped, relieved. “Thanks.”

Smiling, Pepper brushed hair off of his forehead. “Anytime.”

~*~*~

Tony was glad to wake up, slightly hung over and curled up in Pepper’s bed, which was warm and smelled of some kind of mild spice - not quite as sharp as cinnamon, but like it. He was sure Pepper had only left the bed a little bit ago. He had a vague memory of her wiggling out from his arms and leaving.

Rolling out of bed, Tony wandered into the kitchen, blinking blearily.

She smiled at him over her shoulder, thin-strapped tank and little shorts looking far too cold to be wearing with the light drizzle outside. Her hair was sticking up slightly; Tony wandered over and fixed it.

“Thanks,” she said, passing him coffee. Tony hummed and leaned against her side, sipping.

“Have I completely embarrassed myself with last night?”

“No,” she said affectionately. “You’re still the same Tony I’ve known the past four years.”

“Charming and irresistible?”

She snorted. “More like ridiculous and exasperating.” The words had no bite to them, though, and were countered by the way she rested her cheek on top of his head. “I don’t think less of you, if that’s what you’re asking. Maybe of this guy-”

“Rhodey,” Tony said. “And don’t. He’s a good person.”

She hummed. “So you seem to think, but I’ll reserve judgment, thanks. He hurt you.”

“You’re ridiculous, Potts,” Tony muttered, rolling his eyes. He pulled away, downing all the coffee. “I need to get back to Obie’s. There was more I wanted to study in the files, so…”

“You want me to-”

“I’ll catch a cab,” he said. Pepper nodded, so he kissed her cheek, thanked her, and slipped out her door.

Obie wasn’t home when Tony got there, so he took the time to shower, make more coffee, and settle on the floor with the contents of the file spread out around himself. He lost track of time, was sure it was after lunch, the sky outside dimming towards evening, the rain gone but clouds still covering the sky.

There was more that Tony needed, almost like some pages were missing, so he let himself into Obie’s office. It was immaculate, as always; Tony wasted no time opening the top drawer to pull out the files there. He flipped through them, looking for more of what he needed, or loose papers, or something.

He did find some loose papers, stapled together. He sat down, flipping through them. After a moment, Tony frowned and went back to the first page, reading more carefully. This wasn’t what he’d been looking for, but….

“Tony, my boy. What are you doing?”

Tony looked up. Obie stood in the doorway, leaning against the jam, a cigar already between his fingers. He must have been at a meeting before coming home.

“What is this?” Tony demanded.

Slowly Obie walked over, setting a hand heavily on Tony’s shoulder and leaning over him to examine the papers. “Ah. I take it you see the problem there, then?”

“These numbers are wrong. Someone’s-”

“We know.”

“We?”

“Well, your father and I of course,” Obie said, glancing at Tony. “We admittedly haven’t been focusing on this - were going to as soon as the demo was done with. Someone is going to be losing a job soon.”

Tony frowned at the papers. “I can-”

“No, no. You should focus on getting back on your father’s good side,” Obie said, pulling the pages from Tony’s hands. “What were you doing in here?”

“I thought maybe some pages were missing,” Tony muttered, eyes following as Obie put the papers back in the drawer, then stacked the files Tony had taken out on top of them. “Or maybe there was an extra file.”

“Hmm.” Obie clapped Tony’s back. “I wouldn’t think so, but we can look it over together if you’d like.” He led the way to the door, waiting for Tony to exit before shutting it.

“It’s fine,” Tony sighed. “I should probably get to sleep soon, anyway.”

Obie’s hand squeezed Tony’s shoulder, jostling him slightly. “You’ll do fine, my boy. I know it.”

“Thanks, Obie,” Tony said, smiling.

~*~*~

Rhodey sighed when another call went to voicemail.

“What’s eating you?” Jeanie asked, walking by on her way to the fridge. Rhodey scowled at her back. She grabbed a bottle of juice and turned to face him, brow raising. “Do we need to take this upstairs or something?”

“No,” he said, teeth grinding. “I’m fine.”

Jeanie snorted, rolling her eyes as she came to take a seat across from him. “Yeah, you’ve been the complete opposite of fine since last week.”

“I-”

“Don’t even, Jimmy,” she said, leaning forward. “It was clear you were upset all week, hell, the way you took it out on Tony….” She shook her head, frowning.

“I didn’t take anything out on Tony,” Rhodey grumbled defensively.

Jeanette gave him a disbelieving look. “If you weren’t ignoring him, you were snapping at him. If you weren’t avoiding a room he was in, you were jerking away any time he touched you. I thought maybe he’d pissed you off somehow, except he just _took_ it. He didn’t get angry back. So either he felt guilty for something, or he understood that you were lashing out.”

“I wasn’t lashing out,” Rhodey sighed.

“So what’d Tony feel guilty about?”

“Nothing.”

“Jim,” Jeanette sighed. She stared at him for a bit, lips pursed. “Every morning since you two showed up, you’ve made Tony coffee. Except last week.”

“I-”

“Every time Tony stood next to you, you’d touch him - shoulder, his back, just these little touches, and he’d lean into them. Except last week, you wouldn’t touch him, and every time he tried touching you, you acted like he had the plague.”

“Seriously, Jeanie, you’re-”

“He still looks at you the same as before.”

Rhodey paused, frowning. “What do you mean?”

Jeanie laughed. “God, he had the biggest crush on you back then, remember?” When Rhodey just stared at her, she insisted, “He looked at you like you hung the moon. Still looks at you like that, though he’s a bit subtler. You’d think he’d be more obvious, actually,” she mused.

“We were just friends back then. I looked out for him,” Rhodey insisted.

“I know,” Jeanette said sincerely. “I know you wouldn’t have started something with some underage kid, especially one that seemed as desperate for affection as Tony was. It’s why Mama and Dad didn’t care about letting you two share a room when he was here. They knew you’d not let anything happen.”

Rhodey swallowed. “I…”

“God, but sometimes - especially towards that last year and after you two graduated - the sexual tension was killer. I was basically counting down the days to him being legal!” she laughed.

Rhodey shook his head, dragging a hand over his head. “Jeanie, I was with… I was in a relationship.”

“Yeah.” She smiled a bit, sadly. “Tony was always so happy for you, even though I think it was just about killing him.”

Soundlessly, Rhodey opened and closed his mouth, trying to think of something to say.

“Must have been like a fairy tale for him when you finally started going out,” she laughed. There was a happy, fond sort of smile on her face, eyes distant. “Mama always had thought you two would eventually.”

“What?” Rhodey said hoarsely.

Jeanette laughed, giving him an affectionate look. “Jimmy, it’s not like we couldn’t tell you loved him too.”

_“What?”_

She frowned, looking slightly confused now. “What do you mean, what? God, every time you came home without him it was ‘Tony this’ and ‘Tony that’. ‘Tony’s so brilliant, Mama, he’s building a learning robot.’ ‘Tony’s graduating early, he said our classes are _too easy_.’ ‘I tried to talk Tony into coming home with me but he said he had to go back to his parents’. I’m worried about him.’ And half the time you called Mama and Dad, Tony was in your room too.” She raised a brow.

“I was _looking out for him!”_

Jeanette was looking at him in concern. “I know that, Jimmy, but….” She trailed off, brows pulling down farther. “C’mon, Jimmy. It’s okay that you were in love with him then, you didn’t take advantage or anything.”

Rhodey couldn’t… he couldn’t catch his breath.

“And more importantly, you two are obviously happy together now. You haven’t really lit up like you do when he walks in since you brought Todd home that time.”

Rhodey shoved back from the table, stumbling.

“Jimmy?” Jeanette called, but he ignored her, staggering up the stairs to his room and shutting the door, locking it. He leaned back against it and dropped to his ass, focusing on steadying his breathing.

Tony… Tony had been in love with him since MIT? Jeanie said it was _obvious_ , that Tony was _still in love with him_ _._

Rhodey had asked Tony to pretend to be in a relationship with him and… and had _kissed him_ and said it was a _mistake_ and….

_Fuck_.

~*~*~

“You’re late!” Howard snapped.

Tony rolled his eyes, walking past his dad and onto the jet. “Technically you’re the one holding us up right now.”

“Watch your attitude!” Howard growled, right behind Tony. Tony ignored the way his heart jumped slightly into his throat. He let out a slow, silent breath and took his seat with pointed flippancy. Howard sat across from him scowling.

“Anthony, I swear, if you won’t take this seriously-”

“I _am_ ,” Tony snapped, shifting upright, glaring. “We hit a traffic jam on the way and had to detour, alright? I can’t fucking control everyone else on the goddamn road!”

Howard grunted, leaning back and giving Tony an exasperated look. “There’s no need to start cursing, Anthony.”

“Tony,” he groaned, head dropping back. “I told you, I hate Anthony, call me _Tony_.”

“Anthony is the name your mother and I gave you, it’s-”

“It’s stuffy and boring, and I hate it,” Tony interrupted. Quickly, not giving Howard a chance to really get going again, he pulled out his headphones and plugged into his iPod (he could make something _so much better_ ) and turned the volume up full blast.

After a few moments, he cautiously glanced up at his dad through his lashes. Howard was staring out the small window, a deep scowl on his face.

Rolling his eyes, Tony looked down again. He refused to look up at his dad for the rest of the long flight.

It was a long flight - tense, because Tony was avoiding even looking at Howard, and Howard was pretending Tony wasn’t there (as per usual, and Tony always thought it’d stop hurting one day but it never did). By the time the plane landed again, Tony was almost jittery with nerves and he just - he wanted to not be there. He wanted to be with Pepper, or - even more impossibly - with the Rhodes’ again. He couldn’t help but think about rainy days curled up with Rhodey, a very sharp contrast to the hot desert he was stuck in with his father and a bunch of military bigwigs.

Tony pasted on a smile. Shook hands, charmed, laughed at jokes that weren’t funny. Grit his teeth and didn’t disagree when Howard said things about Tony taking over more of the company, taking more interest in weapons. It wasn’t true, but disagreeing with Howard right now would only hurt SI in the long run. And he needed Howard to agree to let him branch out more, had to be good at this one demo.

He tuned out for the most part, just doing things by rote. Talked with those not quite important enough for Howard to spare the attention for about the missile, about SI and future projects they were working on (he focused on the new body armor that he was _sure_ he could make both lighter and sturdier, if he was allowed some time to do so). He stood beside his dad while the Jericho was demonstrated.

He got into the humvee, silently accepted the glass of scotch Howard pressed into his hands. He was giving Tony a big grin, a lot like the showman grin he gave all the generals, but a bit looser.

He almost… he almost thought maybe Howard was happy. Happy _with_ Tony, not just about a successful demo, but that Tony had come along and helped.

Tony wanted to ask, and wanted to do absolutely nothing to disturb what might be the most pleasant moment between the two of them in _years_.

“You’re coming back to the mansion, aren’t you?” Howard said, leaning back and swallowing a large gulp of his own scotch. “Your mother would be glad to see you.”

“I… yeah,” Tony said, eyes a bit wide. “I can come back.” He stopped himself from calling it home - because he was afraid to, and he knew it.

He wanted it to be home too much. It’d never really been, but it was also all he’d had, and maybe… maybe now that he and Howard wouldn’t be fighting about weapons and all….

“Good,” Howard murmured. He eyed Tony a bit, opened his mouth to say something-

And everything exploded into hell.

~*~*~

Rhodey came downstairs in the morning to find his mama standing in the living room, hand over her mouth and staring at the television.

“Mama?” he asked, instantly feeling a small bite of panic. It was too reminiscent of another morning, years and years ago.

She didn’t look away from the TV screen, just choked out a horrified, “Tony.”

Rhodey’s whole body went cold. He stepped closer, staring at the news channel, the headlines, numbly hearing the news anchor explain there had been no word on who was behind the ambush.

No word about if a ransom had been delivered, or if Tony or Howard Stark were even alive.

Rhodey stared, rushing noise in his ears, and thought he might be sick.

~*~*~

The smell of dirt and blood and the sharp medical scent of alcohol overwhelmed him. There was yelling and shouting, most of it unrecognizable, except that it was angry.

Tony hurt. He hurt, everything hurt, and - and -

“Tony!”

Familiar, though he couldn’t - the _pain oh god_ -

Yelling, pain, blood and dirt and that familiar voice -

Tony passed out.

~*~*~

He woke up to someone stroking his hair out of his face. For a moment, outlandishly, he thought of Jarvis, but Jarvis had been dead for months now.

He shifted, struggling to open his eyes when they felt like they’d been weighed down with anvils and glued for good measure.

“Shh, stay still.” The hand in his hair stopped stroking, another hand settled on his right shoulder and pressed lightly. It was enough to keep Tony pinned in place. He tried to speak, but his throat was totally dry, tasted like sand and iron.

“Shh,” Howard repeated. He was stroking Tony’s hair again. “Go back to sleep, Tony.”

Tony kept trying to open his eyes, but the more he tried the more exhausted he felt, and it was simply too easy to listen to Howard and fall back to sleep.

~*~*~

The next time he woke up, he managed to open his eyes. There were rough stone walls and ceiling, and it was cold enough that his breath fogged in front of him. Tony wiggled his fingers, feeling scratchy material, and he turned his head to the side.

Howard slept right next to him, seated on a dirty floor and leaning against the edge of the cot Tony was stretched out on.

He tried to clear his throat, swallow, but it was so dry. Past Howard on a little… make-shift table was a cup, maybe with water. Tony reached out, turning slightly onto his side, and gasped, a low sound of pain escaping.

Howard startled awake, immediately looking up at him and shifting upright.

“Tony, kiddo, lay down, just - there we go.” Howard let out a shaky breath, eyes pinched. He glanced over to where Tony had been reaching and grabbed the cup of water. “Slowly,” he ordered, and carefully tipped it against Tony’s lips.

He gave Tony half the cup in measured, slow sips. When he finally set it aside, Tony tried to think of what to say, what to ask, but there was _so much_ and he, he wasn’t sure….

Howard slumped against the make-shift table, facing Tony, knees drawn up and arms resting on top of them. He was dirty, and Tony thought there were specks of blood on his shirt-sleeves, and there was oddly enough unfamiliar, rough looking gloves on his fingers.

“Okay. You stay just like that, and I’ll tell you what we’re facing.”

Tony nodded.

Howard nodded once, eyes focused past Tony, unseeing. “The convoy was ambushed. We had to abandon the vehicle - I think it blew up at some point.” He took a deep breath. “A missile landed near where we’d gotten cover.”

He glanced at Tony, searching for something, but Tony just stared, wide-eyed. He didn’t remember any of this. He remembered… the demo. Getting in the car, the glass of scotch cold and already sweating condensation in his hand, the invite to come back to the mansion…. And then nothing. He couldn’t pull up anything except fucking _black_ and maybe, horribly, some vague impressions of pain and blood and fear.

He didn’t want to pull at those possible memories. What he was hearing so far was enough to make him think he didn’t want _any_ of these memories.

Nodding, possibly to himself, Howard said, “A piece of large shrapnel hit you. We were taken, brought to this cave system. Whoever has us, has a doctor here, and he helped patch you back up. We-” Howard’s voice broke. He cleared it. “You need to take it easy, because this isn’t a fucking hospital, Anthony, and I’m not going to have you going and getting the damned wound infected or-”

Tony felt something oddly like bitter disappointment. For a while, it’d been like… but no. This was more like the Howard he remembered. Tony turned his head away, closed his eyes and blindly felt with his hand, up to where a consistent pain throbbed. His chest, so damned close to his heart, and god it _hurt_ to even brush against the thick layer of bandages. He breathed in sharply and bit his tongue against any other sounds.

Howard’s hand closed around his, drawing it away. It was damned gentle, completely different from his tone when he said, “Fucking leave it alone, Anthony.”

“Whatever,” Tony mumbled. “I’m tired,” he added, an excuse to stop talking, to not have to look at Howard or acknowledge the sense of disappointment and loss and failure.

“Alright. Rest,” Howard murmured after a moment. “We’ll figure something out, just… rest for now.”

~*~*~

Hands touched his chest, pulling and tugging at the bandages. Tony jerked, eyes shooting wide open, already reaching to shove at the shoulders leaning over him.

Another set of hands caught his, folding around them firmly but with care, even as Howard leaned into his sight, a deep frown on his face.

“Easy, kiddo. Let Yinsen work.”

Panting, Tony glanced to... Yinsen. A kind smile added wrinkles to his face when he glanced up to Tony’s face, hands moving with certainty as he peeled back bandages. Tony glanced down at his chest and the bloody bandages, paled, and looked back up.

“It is nice to meet you, Mr. Stark.”

“Tony,” he croaked. “What’re you doing?”

“Trying to avoid infection - we must change your bandages regularly. Keep your eyes up here, Tony, this isn’t a sight you truly want to see.”

“Sure thing.”

Howard dropped one hand from around his, stroking back Tony’s hair. Tony closed his eyes, throat tight. He had a single memory, hazy and possibly just made-up, that he’d clung to when he was younger. When Tony was small and sick, fevered, bundled up in his bed and exhausted from throwing up regularly… maybe, maybe Tony remembered his dad sitting with him, stroking Tony’s hair just like he was now and talking quietly to him.

Long minutes later, Yinsen pulled away, tying off fresh bandages. Howard leaned back, dragging his hands through his hair when Tony opened his eyes.

“How is it?”

“As well as could be expected, Mr. Stark,” Yinsen said calmly. “How well it continues will depend on too many factors for me to be able to tell you.”

“What-”

Unfamiliar voices barked from somewhere out of Tony’s sight. He twisted his head and hissed in pain when it pulled the muscles of his chest.

Howard’s hand dropped to Tony’s shoulder, and shook.

That, more than anything, left Tony with the sour taste of fear on his tongue.

Yinsen whispered quickly, walking over and helping Howard lift Tony up. He groaned, breath stalling in his lungs, eyes unseeing as _pain_ flooded everywhere.

“Shh, Tony, just… do as I say,” Howard whispered.

He pulled Tony’s hands behind his head, like Yinsen was standing. Tony made a helplessly pained noise, eyes blurring - tears, he was crying, Howard hated when-

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” Howard was breathing, just as the edge of Tony’s hearing.

He stood right next to Tony, positioned the same, right as more men walked into the room. One came forward, gesturing grandly enough that Tony could make it out through the pain and tears.

Yinsen translated. Howard stiffened next to Tony, even as cold numbness spread through Tony’s whole body. Mass murderers - already, Tony had the legacy of a _murderer_ , he’d spent the months since Jarvis’ death trying to escape that but here it was, thrown in his face once again.

(He couldn’t decide if it was worse than the reporter cornering him right after the funeral, asking how Tony as handling the first ‘personal death’ he’d ever experienced, he, the ‘newest merchant of death’ in Stark Industries. He’d taken her phone and flung it away in response. Here, he was helpless, but he still thought that hearing it then was worse.)

Tony, lost in thought, abruptly became aware of the conversation again when Howard said, “No,” voice cold and unrelenting as adamantium.

The man walked forward, getting right in Howard’s face, and then looked at Tony. Tony stared back, chin trembling, muscles twitching with weariness and strain, and gave a single, sharp shake of his head.

Hand lifting, gesturing with two fingers, the man stepped back to make room for four more to come forward, two of them grabbing Tony and manhandling him forward, away from Yinsen and his dad. The others stayed there to hold back Howard, who’d lunged forward and was now struggling, eyes wide and panicked.

“Don’t!”

Tony stared back at him, shaking, terrified, mind blank with it. No words came when he opened his mouth, and then he was out of the cave room and dragged through tunnels, his dad no longer in sight. Not much later, Tony couldn’t even hear the vague sound of Howard shouting.

They dumped him in another room. A single look around proved that Tony wouldn’t like what came next. Barrels of water, whips hanging from walls, chains, other things that his refused to identify.

Another man appeared, slightly better dressed, with a thin face and sharp eyes. Several men were behind him, spreading around the room while he considered Tony, twisting the ring on his finger.

Tony swallowed before hiking his chin up and glaring.

~*~*~

Tony’s knees barely hit the floor before Howard was there, catching him by the shoulders only to wrap around him, warm - _dry_ \- and steady. Tony wanted to say something, stand up or something, but his muscles were still twitching and his throat felt ragged, raw. His face was probably a mess - tears and dirt and blood - so it was probably good Howard couldn’t see it.

Surprisingly, Howard continued to hold him, even rocked them a bit. Tony’s hair stirred from the shaky puffs near his ear.

“Mr. Stark, let me get a look at him,” Yinsen said quietly.

There was a long moment that Howard didn’t seem to listen, or to hear perhaps, one hand cradling the back of Tony’s head, the other curled around his back.

His dad stood up, carefully bringing Tony to his feet as well, and led him over to the cot again, sitting him on the edge almost gingerly. Yinsen’s hands were careful, slowly brushing light touches along Tony’s arms, back, head, chest.

“Are you bleeding from any wounds, Tony?”

It took monumental effort to shake his head. Tony kept his eyes closed, too exhausted to keep them open. Howard caught Tony’s shoulder when he unknowingly slumped into him, holding him steady.

No one asked what had happened. Tony relaxed in increments, Yinsen’s hands gentle, Howard’s arm steady over his shoulders. Safe. His eyes burned, nose tickled, and Tony fought back tears. Howard maybe be acting kinder than usual, but tears had _always_ led to yelling about what an embarrassment or disappointment Tony was.

“Shh, we’ll be okay, Tony. I’ll figure something out, we’ll be okay.”

Tony choked back a sob - not particularly successful, Howard’s hand tightened on Tony’s shoulder and he repeated himself with something too much like desperation.

“I believe, besides some bruises, the worst you have is a cracked rib, Tony,” Yinsen interrupted calmly. “You must be careful not to make it worse.”

Tony laughed, the sound high-pitched and uncomfortable. “Sure,” he said, squeezing his eyes shut. “I’ll just ask whoever tortures me next to-”

“They won’t-”

“They will!” Tony shouted, pulling away from Howard (gasping through the pain of moving too quickly, ignoring Yinsen’s soft scolding). “Cause whatever they want, you won’t give them - I sure as hell won’t give it to them. It’s weapons, right?” He laughed again when Howard stared, expression set, the same kind of stern, disapproving look he’d always given Tony. “I finally convince you not to make me build weapons and now-”

“What the hell are you babbling about, Anthony?” Howard demanded, then dragged a hand over his face and shook his head. “Whatever. You obviously need to calm down and-”

“Calm down?” Tony shouted, eyes wide. “I was just - I’m, I’m stuck here and you - fuck, I-I-”

Yinsen’s hand rested on his upper arm, squeezing carefully. “Deep breaths, Tony. There, that’s better isn’t it?” Tony’s throat hurt, closing up against each inhale, choking him, but Yinsen just kept talking soothingly about breathing in, counting out each inhale and exhale.

Howard was staring, pale and expression hard.

“Rest, Tony,” Yinsen advised, directing him to a far corner of the cave, near a small wood stove or something. It felt like the small orange glow burned him, but it was a good burn. Tony hunched down on the stool there and focused on breathing, not on his shaking hands or the tears blurring his eyes.

Vaguely, he was aware of Yinsen and Howard arguing in low tones across the cave. Tony didn’t know how long it was when Howard came to crouch down next to him, and he didn’t look over at his dad, focusing on the little fire.

For a long time, Howard didn’t speak. Then, gruffly, he said, “Stark men are-”

“Made of iron, I know,” Tony interrupted, bitterly. “Sorry that I’m once more not-”

“Tony,” Howard interrupted, voice sharp. Tony cut off, stiff. He didn’t have to look over to know Howard was rubbing a hand over his face as he sighed, having seen it plenty growing up whenever he did something to earn him a lecture.

“Listen, you’re still a kid no matter how old you are-”

“Like you even remember,” Tony muttered bitterly. He never bothered keeping count of the birthdays Howard missed, that went by without a single acknowledgment from his dad.

Howard sighed again, more sharply, impatient. “I know damn well you’re twenty-two, Anthony Edward Stark. Now stop being a brat and _listen_.”

Tony clenched his jaw against the retort he wanted to fire.

After a moment, Howard continued, “I was saying, you’re still a kid, even if you are twenty-two, but you’re tough.” He let out a shaky breath. “And I don’t… I know you’re good at acting okay when you’re not.” He said something too soft for Tony to hear, but when Tony looked at him in silent question Howard didn’t repeat himself.

“That’s not going to help us here,” he said instead, firmly.

Tony raised a brow.

Groaning slightly, Howard lowered himself to the ground. “The more we fight them, the harder they’re going to hit us. Until even we break.”

Tony considered it. “So, what? We give in?”

Howard blew out a breath. “Of course not,” he said, rolling his eyes. “But we need to get out, or get found, before it happens.”

“A radio signal,” Tony murmured. “Military has to be looking for us.”

Shrugging, Howard said, “If we’re anywhere close to where they’re looking, or not too deep for the signal to actually get out.”

Tony stared at the ground, thinking. “What did they want?”

“The missile,” Howard admitted. “They had pictures - same ones we sent out to the generals.” He shook his head. “Doesn’t make any damned sense. We’ve kept the Jericho quiet.”

“Don’t care,” Tony muttered. “I just want…” He trailed off, not needing to hear how childish it was that he wanted to go _home_.

“Yeah,” Howard sighed. He gripped Tony’s shoulder before he got to his feet. “I promise, we _will_ figure something out.”

~*~*~

They took Howard. Tony sat, anxiously watching the doorway, for a long time before Yinsen managed to convince him to accept a distraction. He taught Tony to play backgammon, which took just enough of Tony’s attention that he stopped looking at the door every three minutes.

Though nearly impossible to really keep track of time in the cave, Tony assumed most of the day had passed when they dragged Howard back.

Howard managed to keep his feet all the way over to the cot, not once looking back as the men who had brought him left, laughing. But once there, he collapsed, pale, lips pressed thin and tight, deep lines around his eyes.

He allowed Yinsen to start checking him over and focused instead on Tony.

Tony shifted, eyes ducking from the steady stare, feeling oddly cornered.

Yinsen frowned when he got to Howard’s back, fingers hesitating. Tony’s heart leapt into his throat.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

Something too much like relief flashed over Howard’s face, even as he said, “It’s not important, Anthony. We need to-”

“What’s _wrong?”_ he demanded, hands clenching.

Howard hesitated, but Yinsen had no qualms about speaking. “Some of these are quite deep, Mr. Stark. We should bandage them as best we can and take care to avoid infection.”

Tony paled.

He knew enough of what had been in that room to guess. Swallowing thickly, he walked over, ignored Howard telling him something along the lines of not to, and examined his dad’s back. It looked… not as bad as Tony had feared, but….

“This is only the start. They will get harsher the longer you fight them,” Yinsen sighed.

“Then maybe we should stop fighting them,” Tony said, voice shaking.

Howard sneered, staring at Tony like he’d broken some kind of trust. Tony stared back at him.

“Maybe we should stop fighting before they do actually break us,” he insisted.

“No son of mine will bow to the wants of fucking terrorists like a-”

“ _Duh_ ,” Tony said, glaring. “I’m not fucking saying we do what they _want_.” He rolled his eyes. “But if they think we are…”

“We have more time,” Howard said, straightening, eyes bright. “Perhaps tools, materials.”

“Things we can make for ourselves,” Tony agreed, nodding.

“We can’t give in just yet,” Howard murmured, not quite a warning. More like he was already lost in thought, creating a blueprint for their time here like he did inventions. “A few more days, perhaps, but not yet.”

“Me,” Tony whispered. “I have to give in - they’ll expect it from me, more.”

Howard stared at him, quiet, intent. Slowly, he nodded. “You’re right. I don’t like it, and they’re stupid to think it, but we’ll use it.”

Tony fought back a smile - because that sounded an awful lot like Howard didn’t think Tony would be the one to break first. It sounded a lot like trust and belief in Tony and… and things he’d never been sure Howard actually felt about him.

He knew better than to let one little sign get his hopes up – like he had with Rhodey; oh, how he missed Rhodey right now – but it was hard not to.

~*~*~

Rhodey sat in his dad’s hospital room, staring out the window over the tops of the buildings nearby and lost in thought. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been simply sitting there before his dad got his attention again.

At some point, he must have gotten lunch and eaten some of it. Not even half of it, Rhodey noticed, the pain flaring dully. It hurt, watching his dad fade away in front of him like this.

“What’s on your mind, Jim?”

Rhodey sighed, leaning back in his chair, and dragged a hand over his hair. “Just….”

Nodding, his dad said, “Tony.”

“I can’t find out anything,” Rhodey croaked. “They won’t tell me… anything.”

“You mention you’re his fiancé? Does his mother know anything more?”

Rhodey floundered for a moment. “She… uh, she doesn’t know….”

“Right, your mama mentioned, but I think Tony’d forgive you for outing you two to his mother in this case, don’t you?”

Rhodey closed his eyes, suddenly feeling like crying. “Dad,” he croaked, and then stopped. When he opened his eyes again and looked, his dad was staring at him steadily, kindly.

Like he was waiting for Rhodey to talk to him about something.

“Dad,” Rhodey said hoarsely. “Tony and I aren’t engaged.”

Nodding, his dad leaned back against the pillows some more and folded his hands over his stomach. “I know, son.”

Rhodey blinked. “What.”

Smiling slightly, Dad repeated, “I knew you two weren’t actually engaged, Jim.”

“You… since when?!”

“Well, I suspected that first day, but I’ll admit I was hoping I was just being a suspicious old fool. Then you all came to visit and it became pretty clear you were trying to pull a fast one on your old dad.” He gave Rhodey a shrewd look. “I may be dying, Jim, but I’m still here enough to see when someone is hopelessly pining after my son. And son, it’s hard to miss with Tony. Kid wears his heart on his sleeve if you know how to look right.”

“Did everyone know he was in love with me?”

“Is in love with you,” his dad corrected simply. “And yeah, probably,” he added with a little laugh.

“But… we were acting like….”

“Jim, you might have been acting like a couple in love, but Tony didn’t look at you like a man who’s gotten what he’s wanted for years. He still looked at you like you were the stars – beautiful, awe-inspiring, but forever out of reach.”

Rhodey flushed. “I didn’t know,” he murmured.

“No, I knew that,” Dad reassured him. He reached out, patting Rhodey’s hand. “You might have always been a bit in love with him, too, but I could tell you hadn’t actually thought about it yet.” He eyed Rhodey, then added, “Take it you have now, though.”

“I didn’t know,” Rhodey repeated, a bit helplessly.

“But you do now,” his dad said firmly. “You know how he feels, and you’re figuring out how you feel. All that’s left, really, is to decide.”

Rhodey looked at his dad, so much thinner and frailer in body, but today his eyes were just as sharp and bright and _alive_ as ever. “Decide what, Dad?” he asked.

“You gotta decide what you’re going to do from here. Are you going to let things remain as they are, or are you going to put yourself out there and see if Tony is willing to actually be in a relationship with you, for real this time.”

Fighting off the feeling of tears and grief, Rhodey said, “The media doesn’t think he’s going to come home. They said he’s probably dead. Assumed dead.”

Hand tightening over Rhodey’s almost painfully, Dad glared at him. “Now you listen here, Jim Rhodes. You think long and hard about our boy Tony and you tell me if you think he’s the kind of die, or if he’s going to be giving whoever dared take him one hell of a fight. Because if I were a betting man, I’d put my money on that kid. Don’t give up hope until you have to, Jim. And if you get a second chance, you damn well better make the most of it.”

~*~*~

The water left a horrible taste on Tony’s tongue, deep in his throat where he couldn’t spit it out, where it lingered and haunted him. He’d given in, finally.

He was glad of it.

They’d dragged him through the caves and tunnels, bag over his head. He’d counted his steps as best he could, tried to remember the directions they’d taken. The light outside had almost blinded him, and what he’d seen had distantly left him wishing he had remained blinded.

That was a lot of Stark weapons.

He reported it all to Howard, after. Yinsen and Tony had been brought back to the cave, one of the men staying to find out if Howard would keep fighting or help. Howard had given an obviously grudging agreement, and as soon as the man had left, walked over and yanked Tony into his arms.

Tony couldn’t remember the last hug he’d gotten from Howard.

He couldn’t help clutching back, burying his face into his dad’s shoulder and shaking. Just… he couldn’t stop shaking, couldn’t get the dirty taste of that water out of his mouth, couldn’t stop seeing how many Stark weapons these guys had. He had no idea how so many Stark weapons had slipped into enemy hands. It didn’t make sense. If a shipment had gone missing, there’d be records of that. But all shipments had been received that Tony knew of, SI kept impeccable records.

The only discrepancies he knew about were….

The financial ones Obie had said he’d take care of.

Could that person be behind this, too? How?

Somehow, Tony wound up near the stove on a stool, Howard holding his hands around a warm cup of what was probably that awful tea. The warmth was nice, though, and Tony gulped it down, hoping that maybe _that_ could chase away, or at least overpower, the tease of dirty water.

Howard waited, oddly patient, maybe even worried. Tony looked at him, the increased lines of his dad’s face and the grey in his hair and the unusually open emotion in his eyes.

“I thought I was finally going to be able to stop making weapons.”

Tony didn’t realize he’d spoken until Howard frowned. But instead of anger, instead of yelling, he simply looked… confused, attentive.

“You said something like that before. What do you mean?”

“The deal, or compromise or whatever.”

Sighing, Howard put a hand on Tony’s shoulder and squeezed. “Tony, I don’t know what on earth you’re talking about.”

Tony hesitated, feeling something cold gather in his chest. “Obie said he talked to you about how I don’t want to make weapons anymore.”

“Yes,” Howard said. “He advised that I give you some time while he worked you around to the idea. Called to tell me he’d gotten you to see reason and-” Howard stopped, examining Tony’s face. “And I take it that he lied.” Frowning, Howard murmured, “Why would he lie?”

“He told me you agreed that I could make other things, so long as I helped out with one major weapon and a few of these meet-and-greets every year. He said- he said that the lawyers were drawing up a contract, that you, that you _agreed_ -”

Tony’s air cut off and he bent forward, groaning. Howard’s hand landed over the back of his neck, rubbing carefully. He sighed again.

“I’m sorry, Tony, but that’s not what happened. I don’t know why Obie lied - perhaps he thought if he got us together on the plane things would work out.”

“Maybe,” Tony croaked. He couldn’t figure it out, though. Obie never lied to him, not about Howard… except he had, and Tony couldn’t help wondering what else was a lie.

~*~*~

Tony managed to hide the inflamed skin around the wound on his chest for three days.

Howard caught sight of it when Tony was bent over, pulling apart one of the weapons they’d been supplied with to make the Jericho - or, to be more accurate, to make their means of escape with.

“Why the fuck didn’t you say anything, Anthony!” Howard yelled. Tony cringed back from the yelling - he hadn’t missed it, was sad to see it return - before hiking his chin up and glaring right into Howard’s eyes.

“Because there’s nothing to be done about it. We either make it out of here and I get medical help, or we don’t and I get sick.”

“ _Damn it_ _,_ Anthony, we can’t afford you-”

“Gentlemen,” Yinsen interrupted, voice soft in comparison to Howard’s, quiet and gentle but still decisive. Tony looked over at him, ignoring his dad.

“Let us focus on what we should be doing, instead of arguing over things we cannot change. Tony didn’t tell us, but we know now. We will do what we can for the infection, and work quickly to get out of here.” He gave them both a firm look over his glasses. “It is an important week for you two, if you want to survive.”

They all went back to work, Tony tight with anger, seething. Howard stomped around, grumbling, for a long while before falling silent as well.

It was later that night, when Tony curled under the blanket on the cot and pretended to sleep, that Howard came over to him. He stroked a hand over Tony’s head, brushed a kiss against his hair, and murmured, “You’ll be okay. Please, be okay.”

~*~*~

Tony made more of an effort to talk to Howard while they built their radio and some make-shift weapons for themselves, along with the useless missile looking structure.

Unlike his memories of trying to talk shop with his dad as a kid, or showing him things he had built then, Howard listened. Sometimes he scowled and told Tony he was being stupid, only to show Tony something better, something brilliant. Others, he simply nodded and even occasionally gave a gruff “good work.”

That didn’t mean that sometimes Howard didn’t piss him off. In fact, sometimes Tony got so angry he wanted nothing more than to storm away, but there was nowhere to go. Howard still ignored when Tony talked about not making any more weapons. Tony wanted to push, and at the same time he dreaded breaking what felt like a truce between them.

He didn’t think he had the energy to really fight with his dad, anyway. Just the work that the three of them did during the day was enough to leave Tony completely drained, and the more days that passed, the more he needed breaks throughout the day. The more easily winded he became, the weaker he got; when he started falling asleep while taking one of multiple breaks, Tony knew things were only going to get worse that much quicker.

“We need to step up our timetable,” Howard muttered.

“I’m trying-” Tony started to say, but cut off when Howard squeezed his shoulder, eyes tight but not angry.

“I know you are, kiddo. But at this point, I’d rather you rest, save your strength for getting out of here, than waste it working.”

Tony scowled. “I can-”

“Rest,” Howard said sharply. “You can damn well rest, Anthony.”

Swallowing back angry words, Tony went to silently seethe on the stool near the stove. He hadn’t meant to doze off, hated that it proved Howard’s point that much more.

They were almost ready - so close - when the guy in charge stormed into the room, moving things around, eyes too sharp and suspicious for Tony’s taste. He didn’t expect the man to grab him by the back of his hair and yank him over to the mini forge they’d had set up, grabbing Tony’s hand and pulling it closer, closer to the heat.

“He wants to know what we are really doing,” Yinsen said, voice shaking. “He does not believe we are building the Jericho.”

“Tell him we are,” Howard said quickly, wide-eyed and pale. Before Yinsen could translate, he said, “We’re building the damned missile, okay, we’re building your damned weapon!”

Tony’s hand was uncomfortably warm. He gasped in quick pants of breath, shaking uncontrollably. Not his hand, not his hand, not his _hand_ , he _needed his hands!_

For a moment, Tony felt the coals on the palm of his hand, seering, and then the man flung him aside. Tony sobbed, rolling onto his back and cradling his hand to his chest.

“My missile will be ready by tomorrow,” the man stated. “Or I will do far worse to his hand.”

Howard glowered at him as the man walked out of the cave room, guards falling in behind him.

Yinsen crouched down near Tony, long fingers curling around his wrist to pull his hand back enough, peering at it with a furrow between his brows.

“With treatment, your hand should be fine, Tony,” he said. “Mr. Stark, go wet a cloth, we will wrap it around his hand to decrease swelling.”

Howard did as told, then sat down in the dirt next to Tony, who tried to stop the sounds coming from his throat. He wasn’t sure if the way Howard began to stroke his hair helped or made it a more difficult task, honestly.

“Don’t worry, Tony,” he said. “We’ll be out of here by tomorrow morning.”

Tony sniffed sharply, forcefully swallowed back more tears, and said, “We’re not ready though.”

“No,” Howard agreed. “But we’ll improvise.”

~*~*~

Tony refused to think about it. If he stopped to think about it, he’d break. He focused on taking one step after another. He focused on the weight of his dad at his side (and not the damp section of shirt from the blood). Just one step and another step and another, not the hot sun that burned his shoulders and arms, not the scratch of thirst in his throat, not his dad’s inaudible mumbling, not how much his own hand _ached_ with popped blisters and sand against sensitive burns.

What were they supposed to do, besides keep walking? Tony didn’t know where they were. He had the radio sending out a constant signal, but hell if he knew what the range ended up actually being, hell if he knew if anyone was close enough to hear it.

So he didn’t think about anything, except walking across the sand.

It’d been hours - or at least, Tony was sure it’d been hours, it had to have been hours - and he was tired and hurting and wheezing for breath, lightheaded and dazed, only walking through force of will.

So at first, he didn’t notice the sound at the edge of his hearing.

When he did notice, he thought he was imagining it.

When he _saw_ the helicopters, he froze, staring with wide eyes. But they really were there.

He threw his free hand in the air, waving frantically. He tried to stumble forward faster and tripped, landing hard on his knees, barely catching and steadying Howard.

Tony’s breath hitched as he inhaled, torn between crying and laughing.

Howard’s hand tightened on his shoulder. He blinked several times, focusing on the helicopter.

“Thank god,” Howard breathed. “Oh thank god.”

As the group of soldiers got closer, some of them obviously medics, Tony closed his eyes and slumped forward, grateful when hands caught him.

They’d escaped. They’d been found.

They were safe now.

~*~*~

“Rhodes speaking,” Rhodey said, distracted by Lila and Ben making their sundaes. He shot Lila a warning look when she tried to add a fourth scoop of sprinkles.

“James Rhodes?” asked an unfamiliar voice - male, New Yorker, but that was all Rhodey could tell. Still, there was something like authority in the tone, and it made him unconsciously straighten.

“Yes. Who is this?”

“Howard Stark.” Before Rhodey could process _that_ \- because one, it was Tony’s dad, and two, that meant _they’d been found_ \- Howard continued. “Where’s the closest airport to you?”

“Uh… what?”

Rhodey thought he muttered something about _they said you were smart_ , before Howard was snapping impatiently, “The closest airport to you, Rhodes, what is it?”

“Philadelphia,” he said, then quickly because if this man was anything like Tony on the phone, “Why?”

“A StarkJet is going to pick you up there.”

“ _Why_ ,” Rhodey repeated, more firmly.

There was a moment, where it seemed very likely that Howard would simply hang up without explanation.

“Tony is refusing to talk. To anyone. Last thing he apparently told anyone, according to Captain Rogers, was that he’d only debrief it was with you.”

Rhodey stumbled into a chair, dizzy with relief, with the confirmation that Tony was _alive_.

“He’s okay?” he croaked.

Howard hesitated, before saying, “He’s alive, and he’s a Stark. He’ll be okay.”

It would sound almost cruel, uncompassionate and harsh. Except there was just a bit too much desperation in that last word, in the way Howard’s voice went a little hoarse.

“I’ll be there in an hour,” Rhodey promised.

“Tony’s assistant, Ms. Potts, will be waiting for you there,” Howard stated, and hung up without another word.

For a moment, Rhodey sat there, stunned. Then he shot to his feet, yelling for his mama, even as he started for the living room

She ran downstairs, eyes wide and make-up half done. “What? Jimmy, what’s wrong?”

“I have to go - Tony, they-” He paused, taking a deep breath. “Mama… they found Tony. His dad called, he said that, that Tony isn’t talking to anyone. Only said that he’d talk to me.” He swallowed. “Mama, I-”

“Of course,” she said, concerned and understanding. “Go, pack your things. I’ll call Jeanie, and-”

“Mama, I can’t wait-”

“I know that,” she said. “I’m going to see if Carrie next door can watch Lila and Ben until Jeanie gets home.”

“You don’t-”

“Just to the airport,” Mama said softly. “I don’t think I want you driving right now. Go pack.”

Not willing to argue with her, Rhodey rushed upstairs to do so.

~*~*~

“-sure this is a good idea?”

Tony kept still, staring at the wall - windowless, bare, ugly off-white, almost maybe worse than the cave, just a different kind of cave - and hoped that Captain Rogers wasn’t going to come in and try talking to him again.

Tony didn’t want to talk to anyone.

Yinsen died, protecting Tony. Yinsen died and it was Tony’s fault. Tony had helped make weapons, and because of that soldiers had died and Yinsen had died and… and Jarvis. Tony made weapons, and people died. They’d be alive if Tony had done something different.

He’d thought about it a lot, while in the cave. And while walking through the sand, Howard leaning on him. The ambush had been too well planned. The terrorists had had Stark weapons - and the image of the Jericho that had been sent to the military. So someone had to have _given_ it to them. Someone in the military, probably, who had that information available to them, who knew when and where the demonstration was, and could sneak weapons into the wrong hands and had access to that image.

Tony knew Howard seemed to trust Captain Rogers, they seemed almost like friends in fact, but Tony didn’t trust anyone.

“You could get into a shit-ton of trouble for this, Howard,” Captain Rogers said sharply, right outside Tony’s door.

Tony stiffened.

“You and I both know I’m too important for them to actually do anything against.”

“Yeah, but Rhodes isn’t.”

“He had no way of knowing I was bringing him in against orders.”

“Howard, you-”

Tony strained, but didn’t hear anything else. The voices hadn’t gotten quieter, like they’d moved away. Rogers had stopped talking pretty quickly, in fact, and-

The door opened.

He debated turning around, or staying in place, and hadn’t made a decision about what he was going to do in the few seconds of silence.

“Tones.”

Tony scrambled upright, twisting himself in the sheets uncomfortably and uncaring about it, because that really was-

Rhodey stood there, eyes wide and mouth parted. His hands twitched at his sides.

His… his dad had gotten Rhodey here? Tony didn’t know why or how and frankly didn’t give a goddamn in that moment. Because Rhodey stood right there, in front of him, somehow, and….

Tony blinked, eyes burning and blurry, and his throat grew tight and painful, and he clenched the sheets, ignoring how his burned hand hurt when he did so.

“Rhodey,” he croaked.

The next thing Tony knew, Rhodey was right there on the bed next to him, hands fisted in the back of Tony’s borrowed army t-shirt. Tony held him back just as tightly, gasping for breath, face shoved into the side of Rhodey’s neck.

He’d thought he was going to die in those caves. He’d thought he was going to die, and never see Rhodey again. It didn’t fucking matter that Rhodey didn’t love him, because Tony couldn’t stand the idea of never getting to see him again, especially after how they’d fought before he left and-

Rhodey was saying something, garbled and choked, almost too much to make out. After a moment, Tony realized it was “You’re alive,” repeated over and over again.

That, ridiculously, made him cry harder.

Eventually, Rhodey leaned back, hands running up Tony’s back to cup his face, pull it from his neck and tilt it up.

“You fucking idiot,” Rhodey breathed. “Don’t you ever do this to me again.”

Rhodey kissed him.

Rhodey tilted his head down, and _kissed Tony_. Tony stilled, startled, not sure what to do. Did he kiss back or - why was Rhodey even kissing him anyway, was this a ‘I’m glad you’re alive’ thing that friends did that Tony wasn’t aware of, or-

Pulling back, Rhodey rested his forehead against Tony’s, thumbs making slow gentle strokes over his cheeks.

Tony opened his mouth, but wasn’t even sure where to start, what to say. Rhodey sighed, eyes closing and leaning to press a lighter, briefer kiss to Tony’s lips before he leaned back against the pillows.

“So, we need to talk,” he said, sighed. One of his hands slid around to Tony’s back again and rubbed up and down. “But not sure now’s the best time.”

“Does this talk have to do with… uh, what you just did?” Tony asked cautiously.

Rhodey hummed, which was totally _not_ an answer, and said, “I think there’s something we should talk about first, don’t you?”

“No, I don’t,” Tony said stubbornly, knowing exactly where this was going. Captain Rogers and his dad wouldn’t have had Rhodey come just because they wanted to make him feel better. No, they wanted him to _talk_. About the caves, about escaping, about the terrorists, about… Yinsen. About the Stark weapons.

Rhodey’s dark eyes looked at him contemplatively, almost solemnly.

“Why aren’t you talking to anyone here, Tones? Your dad’s already told them what happened, so it’s not like anything is a big secret you’re keeping.”

Tony set his jaw, stubbornly not answering. Rhodey’s eyes narrowed slightly, sharpened.

“So the problem isn’t what you’d say, but who you’re telling it to,” he murmured. Tony stared back, and slowly Rhodey nodded. “Okay,” he whispered. He leaned closer. “You wanna tell me why you don’t trust anyone here?”

For a moment, Tony pressed his lips together. He shouldn’t say anything about it - but….

“Someone knew where we were. Someone gave them Stark weapons.”

“You think someone’s, what? A traitor?” Rhodey frowned.

Tony scowled, shifting back, off of where he’d been (embarrassingly) sprawled across Rhodey’s chest. Rhodey’s frown deepened and he sat up, catching Tony’s arm.

“Hey, I’m not saying you’re wrong, just…” He scrubbed a hand over his head.

“I’m not wrong,” Tony snapped. “I’ve had plenty of time to think about this, alright?” He knew he was getting worked up, knew he needed to calm down, could already feel himself getting short of breath. “They _knew_ , it was planned too damn well and it was a secret fucking demo. The military knew about it, so who else?”

“Someone stateside?” Rhodey said, raising a brow. “You sure that it has to be military? And even if it is, you sure it’s someone here? Tony, you… c’mon. You can’t distrust everyone.”

“I trust you,” he said, and it gave away more than he would have liked. He looked away, scowling at the door, sure that soon his dad or Captain Rogers would walk through it.

Rhodey sighed. “Alright. Just…. Give me a second here.”

Tony glanced at Rhodey from the corners of his eyes, a little bit of the tension in his shoulders dissipating. Rhodey wasn’t telling him he was crazy, looked like he was actually giving it serious thought.

“There’s not a lot of ways for them to get Stark weapons without your company hearing about it. Either someone’s fudging the inventory, or they’re getting them from a more direct source.”

“SI doesn’t double-deal,” Tony said instantly, scowling. “I know my dad enough to know _that_.”

“Is your dad the only one that has the power to do that kind of thing?”

It was an honest question - it wasn’t like Rhodey knew much about the inner workings of SI. Tony went to tell him that yeah, there wasn’t anyone else - except he suddenly, chillingly remembered going through the file on the Jericho. It’d had a copy of the picture.

Obie had access to a lot of things… including evidence of….

“Holy shit,” he breathed.

“Tones,” Rhodey said worriedly, grabbing his shoulders, steadying him when Tony hadn’t even realized he’d started to sway. “What is it?”

Tony turned to him, mouthing soundlessly, eyes wide. Distantly he noticed people charging into the room, but he didn’t really process it until he was pulled back from Rhodey.

“-did you do!” Howard shouted, glaring, hand on Tony’s shoulder.

Captain Rogers stood near Rhodey, looking ready for some kind of action, but Rhodey was staring at Tony, eyes wide and worried.

“Tony,” he said again.

Tony twisted to face his dad, grabbing his arm tightly. “Obie,” he choked out.

Howard looked at him, frowning. He’d actually bothered to get a haircut at some point, but Tony had only bothered shaving his beard and goatee back into order. He didn’t care if his hair was a little too long, and he wasn’t letting anyone near him with scissors. It was stupid, but it left him uneasy, so.

“What about him, Tony?”

Squeezing his arm, Tony insisted, “It was _Obie_.”

“What was-”

“Dad,” Tony said desperately. “Obie. Obie… did this.”

Howard’s frown cut deep lines in his face. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“Wait,” Rhodey said, holding up a hand. “Isn’t Obie that guy who visited you when you were at MIT? Your… godfather or whatever?”

Tony looked at him, nodding, eyes wide and face pale.

Frowning, Rhodey said, “You think _he’s_ the traitor?”

Again, Tony nodded.

“That’s ridiculous, Anthony, Obie is-”

“Did you know someone’s skimming profits from SI sales?”

Howard stopped, staring at Tony intently now, focused. “No,” he said slowly. “I hadn’t heard about that.”

“Obie told me that you knew, and had wanted to wait until after the demo to do something about it. He told us both lies about me building weapons. He knew where the demo was, he had the picture, he has access to our weapons and shipments and financials. Dad,” Tony choked. “He profits if we….”

Eyes narrowed, Howard got to his feet. He glanced at Captain Rogers and said, “Arrange for us to get stateside, as quickly and quietly as possible. I don’t want anyone but your team knowing about this, Steve.”

Captain Rogers glanced between them all, nodding slowly. “I’ll contact Peggy.”

Tony twitched, uncertain, but Rhodey reached over and placed his hand on top of Tony’s. “A friend of mine knows Captain Rogers,” he whispered. “You can trust them, Tony.”

Swallowing, Tony nodded. He trusted Rhodey - and if Rhodey trusted his friend enough to believe Captain Rogers was safe, then he had to believe that it was true.

Howard, who had been heading for the door, paused and looked back at the two of them, eyes narrowed. Quickly, Tony pulled his hand back, away from Rhodey’s, and stared at the floor. It seemed like a horrible, endless moment that Howard stood there, but then Tony heard his shoes walking away.

Captain Rogers cleared his throat.

When Tony looked up, Rhodey was blushing a bit, sitting straighter and meeting Rogers’ gaze head-on.

“I’ll call the medic and have them bring you the antibiotics you need, Tony,” Captain Rogers said, glancing away from Rhodey after a moment. “Be ready to go.”

“I’ll pack my things now,” Tony said sarcastically, rolling his eyes.

A smile twitched over Rogers’ lips, there and gone, before he turned and left.

The quiet that settled over the room left Tony nervous. He glanced at Rhodey and then away, eyes drifting around the room.

“So, alone again at last,” he joked weakly.

Rhodey shifted on the bed, closer to Tony again. Tony stared at Rhodey’s hand as it reached over and picked his up again, carefully winding their fingers together. His heart was racing again, a strange kind of anticipation leaving him feeling like he was about to do something reckless or run away.

“Maybe we should try to have that talk now,” Rhodey murmured. “While we’re alone and not trying to figure out if your godfather is a traitorous asshole.”

“Or we could-”

“Tony,” Rhodey said. He sighed. “C’mon, man, look at me.”

Reluctantly, Tony did. Rhodey looked… well, kind of heartbroken, all sad and guilty. Tony didn’t like it.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked.

“Tell you what?” Tony couldn’t think of anything he’d been keeping from Rhodey that would demand a talk, let alone have Rhodey kissing him and-

“That you’re in love with me,” Rhodey said seriously.

Ah. Except that.

“I don’t-” Tony tried, but Rhodey shook his head, leaning forward and curling a hand around the back of Tony’s neck. Their faces were a few inches apart, which meant it was pretty damn hard to avoid looking at Rhodey.

“Jeanie said you’ve been in love with me since MIT.”

“Jeanie is a romantic,” Tony muttered. “And has watched too many romcoms.”

Rhodey gave a soft huff. “Jeanie said I’ve been in love with you since MIT.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “There you go, see? She’s just a hopeless romantic, thinking we were engaged only made that worse probably.”

Rhodey didn’t say anything for a moment, lips pressed together and a small furrow between his brows. Then he said, “I’ve been an idiot.”

“Uh… how?” Tony asked, slowly.

“Dad said that you cut us from your life because I was gonna marry Todd.”

“You talked to your dad about-“

“Turns out, Dad knew all along that we weren’t engaged. Said he suspected at first but held out hope he was wrong, until he saw us together.”

“He… knew?”

Rhodey nodded, reaching out to stroke Tony’s cheek when Tony looked crushed and guilty.

“Said he could tell. The way you looked at me.”

Looking wary, Tony asked, “The way I looked at you?”

Rhodey hummed, but didn’t elaborate. Maybe one day, when Tony was more… comfortable with it, when it would be a nice way to tease Tony, maybe even make him blush. “He also said it was clear I was still completely oblivious.” When Tony didn’t say anything, Rhodey sighed. “I hate that you hurt yourself to help me out with this stupid idea, Tony.”

“No,” Tony said immediately. “It was fine, I wanted to help you for once-“

“You’ve helped me out plenty.”

“Not like you-“

“Nothing I did to help you ever hurt me,” Rhodey argued.

Tony huffed, frowning. “Look, it wasn’t _hurting_ me, it wasn’t like I was being – I mean, it was whatever, Rhodey, it doesn’t-“

“Tony,” Rhodey interrupted, grabbing his face between both palms, holding him still to look him in the eye. “Your emotions are just as important as everyone else’s. Including mine. Don’t you _ever_ think that making yourself suffer to make someone else happy is okay.”

After a moment, Tony nodded, if a bit tentatively and Rhodey lowered his hands. He let that be for now – he’d, hopefully, have time to work Tony around to the idea of caring about himself as well as others – to get to what really needed to be said.

“I’m sorry that I hurt you.”

Tony blinked, startled. “You didn’t-“

“I did. Not intentionally, but… well. I was a pretty shitty person to be around before you left. And circumstances don’t excuse me saying that awful shit about you,” Rhodey added before Tony could do more than open his mouth to argue. Tony shut it slowly, looking away uncomfortably, as Rhodey continued. “I was angry and… scared, I guess, by how I was feeling, and I lashed out at you instead of dealing with that.”

“I didn’t leave because of that,” Tony said quietly, plucking at the sheet. He kept his head down as he said, “I mean, I guess it didn’t help but… I was just running again when I left. Couldn’t handle rejection.” The bitter, mocking smile on his face made Rhodey feel like punching someone – maybe himself.

“That… look, let’s just say that whole situation was fucked up, but… I’ve had time to think.” Rhodey huffed slightly, weakly joking. “Kind of had some reality checks from others. And you weren’t wrong, Tony. I was scared of wanting you.”

Tony looked up at him, silent.

“Kissing you… it wasn’t a mistake. My way of reacting to it, yeah, that was a mistake, but kissing you wasn’t.”

Tony was quiet for a minute, thinking it all over. He didn’t want to hope again, not after how things had gone last time, but… but Rhodey was here. Rhodey wouldn’t lie, not about something like this….

He looked Rhodey dead in the eyes.

“Do you really mean it?”

“Don’t know how I never noticed,” Rhodey murmured. “You’re my best friend, Tones. And yeah, I really do mean that I’m in love you.”

Tony pushed closer, kissing Rhodey - and it was great, better than, because Rhodey’s hand tightened on the back of Tony’s neck, and he kissed back. Tony couldn’t focus on anything else but that - where Rhodey’s hand was curled tight over his neck, where his hand fell on Rhodey’s thigh, the way Rhodey’s lips parted and his tongue pressed gently forward.

They parted and came back together, Tony shifting so that he faced Rhodey more fully, was closer. One of Rhodey’s hands dropped to Tony’s waist, the hand on his neck sliding forward to cup his jaw. Tony let out a shivery breath, dove back in for more.

He couldn’t get enough - maybe never would, because kissing Rhodey was all that he’d ever imagined and more and _Rhodey wanted him back_ -

A throat cleared, startling them apart.

Tony paled.

Howard crossed his arms, scowling at a wall across the room. “I’ve got your antibiotics. We’re leaving in fifteen.”

Either Rogers worked fast, or they’d been talking and kissing longer than Tony realized.

He stumbled off the bed and stood on shaky legs, staring at his dad and waiting for… something. Tony knew how Howard felt about it, had heard more than one ‘discussion’ of the ‘unnaturalness’ of it between Howard and other members of the board or socialites at parties. Whatever was coming would probably be bad.

Not even looking at them, not saying a word more, Howard turned and left.

Rhodey’s hand curled around Tony’s squeezing. Tony startled, sucking in a breath, feeling dizzy. He turned to look at Rhodey.

“It’ll be okay,” Rhodey said softly, lifting Tony’s hand and pressing a kiss to the backs of his fingers. “I love you.”

Tony blushed, could feel his whole face _burning_ , even his ears. He couldn’t help smiling, either, staring at his hand in Rhodey’s for a few moments dopily before realizing that he should probably respond to that.

“I love you too,” he said quickly, even though it felt dangerous to, left him with a tight throat and fear in his chest.

Rhodey just smiled, brushed another kiss over the backs of his fingers, and lowered their hands. He didn’t let go as they walked into the hall, where Howard and Captain Rogers stood waiting.

~*~*~

It wasn’t until they were getting off the jet that Tony glanced over at Rhodey, eyes wide and brow furrowed. It made him look painfully young, like Rhodey remembered from MIT. “You’re coming with me, right?” he asked.

Rhodey smiled and reached out to briefly squeeze Tony’s hand. “Of course,” he said. Tony grinned, bright and relieved, and faced forward again, striding after Howard Stark with a confidence Rhodey knew was slightly faked by the way Tony’s hands tapped nervously at his sides.

There were two cars, two drivers, waiting. Near one of them was Pepper Potts, who had met Rhodey at the airport and guided him to the StarkJet. She’d looked him over with sharp and critical eyes, cool and professional.

Now, her eyes were red and a huge grin was on her face as they walked over. Tony stopped in front of her, hands shoved in his pockets and a teasing smile on his face.

“Miss me?”

She hit his shoulder. “Next time you disappear on me like this again, I’m going to kill you,” she said cheerfully. She glanced back at Rhodey, raising a brow. “Are we dropping him off somewhere?” she asked, tone cooling slightly.

Rhodey shifted, uncomfortably sure that Pepper Potts didn’t like him.

Tony twisted, grinning with a hopelessly happy look on his face, and said, “Nah. He’s coming home with me.”

Pepper raised a brow. Tony turned back to her and she looked surprised, glancing between the two of them quickly. A wide grin broke out and she darted forward to hug Tony. Tony was blushing when she stepped back to slip inside the car, already talking on a cell phone. Rhodey stepped up next to him, brushing his fingers against Tony’s hand.

Clearing his throat and not looking at Rhodey, still pink cheeked, Tony gestured to the car. “After you, sugarplum.”

Howard Stark’s car went one direction after a couple minutes into the city, while their car continued another way. Pepper and Tony talked, sometimes in half-sentences that had the feel of old arguments. Rhodey settled back and watched, not quite feeling like he was on the outside. More like he was getting a glimpse at Tony that he had never really seen when they were at MIT.

They finally pulled up in front of the Stark mansion. Rhodey had been there before, but only once. Then, Jarvis had been waiting on the steps for Tony and had welcomed him with a hug.

Now, there was no one there. Tony stepped out of the car and stood there for a moment, face blank.

Pepper stepped up next to Rhodey and bit her lip.

“He hasn’t been back since Jarvis died, I think,” she murmured.

“What?” Rhodey asked, turning to her sharply. He barely managed to keep his voice quiet, when he wanted to yell with surprise. Jarvis had died? Why hadn’t Tony – of course Tony hadn’t said anything. Fucking hell.

“Well, the week or so after he was here, but that’s when Tony and Mr. Stark started arguing more frequently about what Tony should be doing in the company. Tony crashed on my couch for a few months, and then one day he came home from a meeting at SI and said he was going on a ‘vacation’.” Her lips pursed. “I’m still not sure if Howard made him do that, or if it was Tony’s way of being spiteful.”

Rhodey knew which it was – but didn’t doubt that Tony disappearing with Rhodey was more Tony’s interpretation of vacation than what Howard had meant.

Without a word, Tony started up the steps, leaving them to follow after him. The inside of the house was still as large and unnerving as Rhodey remembered. He walked closer to Tony, reaching down to tangle their fingers together. Tony squeezed, letting out a quiet, shuddery breath.

“Mom’s probably-”

“Right here,” Maria Stark said, walking in from one of the room’s further down the hall. The last time Rhodey had seen her, she’d been distracted, fastening an earring on her way out the door to some charity event, pausing only to brush a kiss to the top of Tony’s head as she left. Tony had stared after her for a few moments, shoulders slumping a little, before he forcibly brightened and brought Rhodey to the kitchen. Once talking with Jarvis, his mood had lifted and Rhodey hadn’t thought much of it.

Now, Maria Stark’s hair was a little more grey, and she was dressed down in a pair of well-fitting slacks and a sweater instead of a fancy gown. Rhodey would bet the sweater cost more than his mama’s entire closet, even if it didn’t look particularly fancy.

She stopped in front of Tony, a tight, trembling smile on her face. For a moment, her hands twitched, but she clasped them together instead of reaching out for Tony.

“I am so glad you’re home,” she said.

Tony smiled, a twitch of lips that was there and then gone. Rhodey squeezed his hand again, and Maria’s eyes snapped down, widening slightly.

“Mom, this is Rhodey,” Tony said. He swallowed; Rhodey could feel fine tremors in Tony’s hand before Tony tightened his grip. “My boyfriend.”

Rhodey smiled reassuringly when Tony shot a quick, worried glance his way, like he wasn’t sure that was true or that Rhodey wanted anyone to know. Maybe they hadn’t actually talked about it, but Rhodey thought it was pretty much an unstated fact. They loved each other, and they were going to date each other. Rhodey didn’t care who knew about it, either.

Rhodey turned his smile on Maria, changing it to something a little more polite and distant, and held out his free hand for her to shake.

“Mrs. Stark.”

She blinked at him, head just barely tilting, but reached out to shake his hand. She had a firm handshake, which Rhodey hadn’t expected.

“A pleasure, Rhodey,” she said, and she sounded somewhat surprised, but not upset or falsely happy. She glanced at Tony again and frowned a bit. “Have you been with him the past few months?”

Tony shrugged. “Since I left for vacation,” he said.

Her lips pursed. Rhodey had seen that look on Tony before, hadn’t expected to find it on Maria Stark as well. “I told Howard he was being unreasonably stubborn.”

Tony smiled slightly and shrugged. “We’ve… maybe reached an understanding.”

Her smile returned, all soft and trembling. Finally, she reached out to Tony, even if it was only to brush through the side of his hair. “Well,” she said simply, but with a wealth of meaning behind it – hope and resignation and exhaustion. Her thumb stroked Tony’s cheek, just once, before her hand dropped and she gestured towards the stairs.

“Why don’t you and Rhodey go get settled. I’ll have Darla bring out something to eat?”

“Okay Mom,” Tony said. His hand was tight around Rhodey’s. Maria Stark smiled, that trembling, almost uncertain smile she seemed to constantly direct to them, and turned towards the kitchens.

From behind them, Pepper came forward, like she’d emerged from shadows, and dropped a bag at Tony’s feet. “I’m not carrying your bag, Tony, do it yourself.”

The slight frown on Tony’s face vanished, and he grinned over at Pepper. “You staying?”

She hummed, glancing at Rhodey with an almost sly look. “I thought perhaps you’d like some time to yourself.”

Rhodey flushed, looking away with a slight cough. Tony of course just laughed.

“Not at the moment,” he said easily. “If you’ve got nowhere to be, I can promise you that Darla knows how to make an amazing pound cake, and Mom always has her make it for me.”

“Can’t say no to pound cake,” Pepper said agreeably. “I’ll wait here while you and Rhodey take your bags upstairs.”

Sighing, Tony picked up his bag and reluctantly let go of Rhodey’s hand. Raising a brow, Rhodey took back Tony’s hand. He squeezed it with a small smile when Tony glanced at him.

A small, happy smile stole over Tony’s face before he started to lead the way up the stairs.

“Are you worried?” Rhodey asked once they were safely in private. Tony’s room was large enough to remind Rhodey more of his living room, but unsurprisingly reminded him of Tony’s place during college. Papers and schematics and books were scattered on a desk and a table and the bookshelf had an equal number of books and models of projects. The bed was unmade, looking both inviting and lonely.

Tony frowned, absently dropping and kicking his bag aside towards the closet. Rhodey put his carefully against the wall there, picked up Tony’s and set it upright as well.

“Maybe… yeah. If Obie really was behind all this, I don’t think he’d be the type to go quietly, you know? But Dad has some friends in government agencies… maybe he’ll go to them first. Get back-up.”

“Maybe,” Rhodey agreed. He wasn’t sure Howard Stark was that smart, but he didn’t want Tony worrying.

For a moment, Rhodey considered asking about Jarvis… but this wasn’t the time. Later, when they were alone again and not expected somewhere, he’d ask.

“Ready to go back down?” he asked instead, lifting Tony’s hand to brush a kiss over the fingers.

Tony smiled shyly, then more confidently. He kicked off his shoes on his way out the door, almost making Rhodey trip over them from a step behind. They hit the bottom of the stairs and Tony tugged Rhodey across the entrance hall by the hand again, fingers tangled together.

“Don’t tell Darla I like your mom’s cooking more.”

Rhodey snorted. “I’ll save that blackmail till I need it, thanks.”

Tony laughed, and was still laughing when they walked into the kitchen.

Rhodey noted the surprised, almost oddly heartbroken look on Maria Stark’s face, but made no comment on it.

~*~*~

Tony hesitated to pull off his shirt. He glanced sidelong at Rhodey, gorgeous Rhodey that suddenly was right there in Tony’s bedroom and interested in a relationship with him and….

And Tony was not… he….

Rhodey looked at him, brows furrowing. He reached out to Tony, hand warm on Tony’s shoulder where it gave him a little shake. “Hey, you okay?” he asked.

Silently, Tony nodded. He wasn’t sure Rhodey believed him, and hesitating any longer would just make Rhodey more worried, so quickly, stiffly, pulled off his shirt.

Rhodey set his hand back on Tony’s shoulder. Tony breathed shallowly, staring straight ahead, tensing so he wouldn’t start shaking.

He startled at the soft brush of lips to his temple. Glanced at Rhodey, who moved his hand from shoulder to cheek and stroked his thumb under Tony’s eyes.

“C’mon, Tones. Let’s get some sleep. You look exhausted.”

Tony was pretty tired. It’d been hard to sleep back _there_ , and after it’d been hard to sleep through a night. If it wasn’t the nightmares, it was some small sound startling him awake. Maybe he’d be able to sleep now. Maybe, in his familiar bed and with Rhodey right next to him….

Tony grabbed a sleep shirt and pulled it on, then crawled into bed, watching as Rhodey followed him. As soon as Rhodey settled against the pillows, Tony pushed into his space, curling up against Rhodey’s side and burying his face in the crook of Rhodey’s neck. Rhodey wrapped an arm around him, fingers brushing the hair at the back of his neck.

“I’ve got you,” he murmured. “It’s okay, Tony.”

Letting out a shuddering breath, Tony grabbed the material of Rhodey’s shirt, arm stretched across Rhodey’s stomach, and clung to him. This, too, was as familiar as his bed – maybe more so, in some ways. At the same time, it was new, because there was more to their relationship than before.

Rhodey kept playing with the hair at the back of his head, occasionally murmuring reassuringly and kissing Tony’s hair.

Tony held tight onto Rhodey, and to the hope that he’d finally be able to sleep through a night.

He fell asleep while matching his breathing to Rhodey’s.

~*~*~

Tony’s sleep was plagued by nightmares, some of them bad enough that Tony woke up screaming and struggling, wide eyes blank of any recognition for what felt like endless moments. Rhodey waited until Tony calmed down enough to know it wasn’t someone else grabbing him to hurt him before Rhodey’d wrap Tony back up in his arms. It made something deep in his chest _ache_ fiercely to see Tony that scared, to know that there wasn’t anything he could do to make it _better_.

The next morning, both of them were up earlier than Rhodey would have liked. Tony still looked exhausted, the little frown between his brows doing nothing to make Rhodey feel better about things.

Especially since he wanted to ask about Jarvis.

“You’re thinking too loud,” Tony murmured. His fingers stilled where they’d been tracing patterns on Rhodey’s forearm. “You can leave if-“

“No,” Rhodey said immediately, twisting around until he was facing Tony, even if Tony was avoiding his eyes. “I’m not second guessing this, or thinking it’s too much, okay? I’m not leaving you.”

After a moment, Tony gave a little nod and glanced at him cautiously. “Then what’s got you tied up in knots?”

Rhodey hesitated, but not telling Tony would only cause problems at the moment. “What happened to Jarvis, Tony?”

“Ah,” Tony said, looking down again. Rhodey waited patiently, rubbing his hand up and down Tony’s back. When Tony spoke, it was without looking up. “I take it you didn’t keep up with any news about SI?”

“Not particularly,” Rhodey said slowly.

“Last summer Howard had a… well, long story short, someone got fired, and they were very angry about it.” Tony licked his lips. “I was out with Jarvis. We were getting lunch.” He stopped, took a deep, shaky breath. “Jarvis tried to talk him down, but, well. And – it was a Stark gun, so. He, uh, he… died in surgery. Old, you know, and it was….”

“Tony,” Rhodey murmured.

“I helped design that gun, Rhodey, I can recite the specs for it, take it apart and put it back together again, and it killed Jarvis. He died because of me, the weapon and trying to protect me, and- and Dad just brushed it off, like Jarvis wasn’t _family_ -“

“It’s not your fault, Tony. You can’t control what people do with the things you make.”

“I helped make a-“

“Not your fault,” Rhodey repeated, reaching down to squeeze his hand firmly. He thought about it for a while, then stated, “That’s why you don’t want to make any more weapons, huh? Because of Jarvis.”

“I never liked it much before,” Tony said. “I didn’t _care_ before. I do now. We can give the world something better than means of hurting each other.”

Rhodey smiled, kissing Tony’s forehead. “You’ll figure it out. You’ll do great things no matter what.”

Tony huffed quietly, not quite agreement but Rhodey would take it anyway.

“You able to face everyone today, or should we barricade ourselves in here?”

Tony glanced at him hesitantly, eyes openly vulnerable. “You wouldn’t mind?”

“Nah,” Rhodey said. “We’ll just stock up on some junk food. We can watch movies all day – though, we’re gonna have to call my mama at some point you know.”

Groaning, Tony rolled onto his back, pulling a pillow over his face. He grumbled something into it. Laughing even though he couldn’t make out what it was, Rhodey turned onto his side and pulled the pillow away. Tony fought him a bit before relenting. Grinning fondly, Rhodey leaned over and kissed the pout off Tony’s face.

“It won’t be that bad.” Rhodey twisted to roll off the bed, stretching as he looked around for wherever he’d thrown his pants the other night. “C’mon, let’s get the junk food before anyone else wakes up and tries to talk to us.”

Tony followed, slow paced but not as if he was dragging his feet. He had a little smile on his face, kind of helpless, and it made Rhodey grin back.

“Alright, sugarbear, lead the way.”

~*~*~

Rhodey came downstairs later that evening to grab them both some actual dinner. He wasn’t expecting to find Maria Stark in the kitchen, seated at the island and eating ice cream from a carton. She didn’t stop just because he walked in, either, but her eyes did follow him in a way that was almost wary.

Rhodey decided to somewhat ignore her, opening the fridge and taking out the fixings for sandwiches. He glanced at Maria while he worked, unable to help himself.

Tony didn’t talk a lot about his mom. From how desperate for affection from Rhodey’s mama Tony had seemed, Rhodey had always assumed Maria Stark was neglectful, distant and untouchable like a piece of art in a museum. The one time he’d seen her when visiting Tony had reinforced that assumption.

That wasn’t the woman Rhodey saw sitting in the kitchen though.

Her hair was pulled into a messy ponytail, without any kind of elegance, held in place by what looked like a damned scrunchie. Her t-shirt was worn thin, the writing on the front mostly illegible, a few large capital letters like most college shirts.

Rhodey stuck Tony’s sandwich in the microwave and turned around, leaning back against the counter. He considered Maria Stark, who after a bit stared back at him quietly.

“When did you and my son start dating, Rhodey?” she asked. It was the perfect tone of pleasant small talk. Rhodey reminded himself not to be fooled – no matter how she sounded or what she looked like, Maria Stark was a _Stark_ still.

“A couple days ago,” Rhodey replied. He almost shrugged, but thought that might be taking his calm display too far.

She hummed, scraping the spoon against the side of the carton. “The way Tony spoke of you, and how often he visited, I always wondered.”

Rhodey’s jaw clenched. “Nothing happened back then.”

Maria’s eyes were blue, very pale and clear, and sharp. She stared at him for several long moments, not softening in the slightest. “Why not?”

Rhodey ground his teeth. The microwave beeped, so Rhodey twisted around to open it, yanking Tony’s plate out. He set it on the counter and gripped the edges, breathing measuredly. It didn’t help him calm down.

“Because he was a fucking kid,” he said. “And frankly, desperate for any kind of affection or positive attention.” He twisted back around, glaring at her. “Plenty of people took advantage of that.”

“Except you.” She sounded skeptical. “But now, when he’s been through something traumatic and is vulnerable, you’re suddenly here. And _together_.” She raised a brow. “Taking advantage of my son.”

Rhodey strode forward, stopping at the other side of the island and glaring at Maria Stark. She met his gaze with a stone cold one of her own, not backing down in the slightest. (Again, Rhodey was reminded of Tony, hiked chin and all.)

“I’m not taking advantage of Tony. Yeah, we’re dating now, and the timing kinda sucks, but this has honestly been a long time coming. And he deserved to know that I loved him back.”

“Howard will write him out of the will for it. Tony’ll have nothing, not a dime to his name when Howard’s through with him. Tony probably won’t even be allowed to keep the name ‘Stark’ if Howard has his way,” she said.

“Fine,” Rhodey said between clenched teeth. “My family already thinks of him as part of ours, anyway.” He waited a moment, then added, “And I don’t care if he’s got anything from you and your husband. Frankly, I don’t think he’s ever had anything from you two that matters.”

Maria Stark flinched, minutely. But her chin didn’t lower, and she remained as hard and fierce as before. “He’ll just be a nobody, Rhodey.”

“No, he’ll finally be allowed to be _Tony_.”

Unexpectedly, tears gathered and spilled over, and her lip wobbled, though she otherwise looked unmoved. Rhodey hesitated, no longer sure what was happening.

“And what do _you_ want with Tony, Rhodey?”

He considered her, thinking. “Mrs. Stark,” he finally said, voice soft and serious. “I don’t want anything from Tony. I don’t want his money, or the fame that comes with his last name, or even that brilliant mind of his. I want him happy, though, and if that happens to be with me, then I guess I’m real lucky. But it’s not gonna matter to me if he’s Tony Stark or Tony Nobody, because I love Tony. Just Tony.”

Finally, her posture softened and she smiled, that soft and uncertain thing Rhodey kept seeing from her, like she couldn’t trust that the reason to smile would last long. “Good.” She sniffed, delicate and wet, and repeated, “Good.”

Maria closed the carton and returned the ice cream to the fridge, dropping her spoon in the sink. As she walked by Rhodey again, she hesitantly reached out and put her hand on his arm. “He deserves someone who is happy with him just how he is. Please treat him well.”

Rhodey watched her leave the room. After a moment, he sighed, picking up the plates and taking them upstairs. Tony was seated on the bed, laptop open in front of him and chewing his lip as he worked on some code.

He smiled when Rhodey sat next to him and put the plate in his lap. Tony stretched up to kiss his cheek and set the laptop aside before grabbing the sandwich. He hummed appreciatively with the first bite.

Rhodey set his own plate aside for the moment. “You never really talk about your mom,” he said quietly.

Tony glanced at him, curious. He set down his sandwich and swallowed. “I guess not. Most people don’t want to hear about her – they only care about Howard.”

Rhodey stretched out on his side, smiling to himself when Tony did the same, though he brought the plate to sit between them on the bed. “I want to,” he said.

Smiling, looking kind of hopelessly fond (and obvious with it), Tony lifted up onto an elbow, cheek resting on his fist. “What do you want to hear?”

Rhodey shrugged best he could with his head resting on folded arms. “Anything.”

Tony hummed, eyes going distant. He was quiet for a bit, picking up his sandwich for a few more bites.

“Mom’s a musician. A musical genius, really, one of those kinda legendary ones that people tell stories about in school.”

“Really?”

Tony nodded, looking down at Rhodey and smiling sadly. “She didn’t have a chance for her career to go much of anywhere. She met Howard, they fell in love and got engaged and married within months. There wasn’t time for the wife of Howard Stark to have her own life and career. Then she had me, and… well. Mom focused a lot on her charities and stuff, like the Foundation. It does a lot for kids interested in the arts, or bringing more of the arts back to public schools and stuff. She likes it.”

“Did she teach you to play piano?”

Tony smiled again, somewhat bashful. “I was five, and bored during the summer. She was between projects.”

“Looks like she’s not the only musical genius,” Rhodey teased quietly.

Huffing a little laugh, Tony shook his head, stretching to set his empty plate next to Rhodey’s on the bedside table. “You haven’t heard Mom play. I might be good but she’s… divine.”

“Huh,” Rhodey said, not sure how to respond to that. Tony plopped back down on the bed, closer to Rhodey than before, and smiled curiously.

“Why’re you asking, anyway?”

“Bumped into her downstairs,” Rhodey said honestly. “Made me realize I don’t know much about her at all.”

Tony nodded. “Mom doesn’t let a lot of personal stuff get out to the public. I think if it didn’t do so much good for the charities, she’d not even do publicity for them, either.”

Reaching out, Rhodey stroked Tony’s hair, then leaned forward to kiss him lightly. “Well, maybe I’ll get to know her better while we’re here.”

Tony shrugged, not seeming concerned with it. “I….” He paused, face scrunching a little. “Only until I know Dad has things with Obie at least on the right track.” He reached up and covered Rhodey’s hand. “Then we’ll go back to your family.” He frowned, looking at Rhodey tentatively. “How’s…?”

“He’s still fighting.” Rhodey didn’t have to add that there likely wasn’t much longer left in his dad, though. Tony wiggled closer.

“As soon as I know that things are getting done here, we can go. Or, you can go and I’ll-“

“If I came back without you, I think Dad would drag himself out of the hospital to yell at me and come get you himself,” Rhodey said wryly.

Tony snorted. “I’d be more terrified if you’d said it was Roberta.”

“She’d beat him here.”

Tony dissolved into giggles, burying his face in Rhodey’s chest. Rhodey grinned and held him tightly.

~*~*~

The knock on the door startled Tony. He untangled from where he’d been wrapped around Rhodey, lazily making out instead of working on coding or worrying about things he couldn’t do anything about. There was hardly a few seconds’ pause before the knocking started up again, loud, demanding.

Tony clenched his fists before opening the door.

Howard froze, eyes locked on Rhodey over Tony’s shoulder. His expression went stony and focused somewhere else.

“I wanted to let you know that Obie’s been taken into custody.”

“You found more evidence?” Tony asked.

“No. But I had a friend willing to listen and go out on a limb. Once Obie was out of the offices, I was able to go through some files. Arrogant bastard didn’t even try too hard to hide it.”

“So he… all of it?”

Howard nodded once, jaw set. He turned to go, as if that were all that they needed to talk about. Tony took a step after him, into the hallway.

“Dad – wait.”

“What is it, Anthony?”

Tony faltered, feeling a stab of hurt in his chest. He’d thought they’d been doing better. But his dad was calling him Anthony again, not even looking at him, brushing him off….

“What is it?” Howard repeated.

He didn’t want to admit he was nervous, maybe even a bit scared. Howard looked impatient and tired, and Tony had more experience with that leading to bad things than anything good.

Still… “What about… me?”

Sighing sharply, brows furrowed, Howard asked, “What about you?”

“What about me and SI?” Tony asked, pushing the words out quickly. He glanced up, hands fisted at his sides, and set his jaw. “I’m not going to make any more weapons, Dad. Never.”

Dragging a hand over his face, Howard said, “Anthony, I understand that what happened over there may have been upsetting, but that’s no reason to ignore the good our work does for-“

“That’s not why!” Tony shouted. “It’s never been about whatever you seem to think this is! Rebellion or, or, wanting to usurp you or whatever. I just… don’t want our legacy to only be how well we can destroy things, Dad,” Tony said, desperately hoping that this time, Howard would get it.

Howard sighed and shook his head. “I’m not going to get into this with you right now. I’ve been working my ass off the past few days to make sure our company, the Stark name, isn’t brought to absolute ruin thanks to Obadiah, and you’ve been here hiding out in your room.” His face twisted a bit.

“Fuck you,” Tony spat, teeth clenched, nails biting into his palms. “Fuck you, Howard.” He turned, ignoring Howard’s raised voice, ignoring the sudden appearance of his mom’s voice, and slammed the door to his room behind him.

Rhodey was waiting for him, right there, and immediately wrapped him up in his arms. One hand rubbed up and down Tony’s back, the other cradling the back of his head.

“Forget him, Tony.”

“I thought…. When we were… it seemed like we were doing better,” Tony said helplessly. “It seemed like he… cared.”

Sighing, Rhodey kissed his forehead. “I don’t know, Tones. Maybe he cares, but is shit at it. He’s definitely shit at talking to you.”

Tony didn’t waste the effort trying to pretend to laugh. He nuzzled into Rhodey’s chest.

“Can we go tomorrow?” he whispered. He missed Rhodey’s family. He wanted to get away from his and be with them, instead, wanted the comfort he knew they’d smother him with.

“Sure, Tony.” Rhodey gave him another forehead kiss. “You call Pepper and see if we can use one of those Stark jets. If not, we’ll catch our own flight.”

“Okay,” Tony sighed.

Neither of them moved though for several minutes.

~*~*~

Tony didn’t expect to bump into his parents as he and Rhodey brought their things downstairs early the next morning. Pepper had managed to get one of the smaller jets for them, which meant they weren’t on a schedule, but Tony had thought, hey, leave early and avoid the family drama.

Looked like that plan was a no-go. He hesitated. Rhodey was still upstairs, changing after his shower. He’d be down in a few minutes, but that left Tony alone with his parents until then. After last night, Tony didn’t really want to talk to them. At all. Possibly ever.

“Your father has something he’d like to say to you, before you go,” Mom said, giving him a bright smile, like she did to everyone at parties when she didn’t want to smile but had to pretend. She turned it on Howard and it widened pointedly. “Howard?”

Dad grunted, arms crossed. Tony’s brows raised when Mom elbowed him in the side, sharply. Dad shied away, rubbing his side and grumbling, glaring at her. She raised a brow, smile suddenly serene looking.

“Well?” she prompted.

Scowling, Howard turned to Tony. “We are not shutting down the weapons manufacturing, Anthony. Too many people would lose work – we can’t send them all to the other departments, after all – and stock prices would plummet. It’s irresponsible and stupid.”

Tony clenched his jaw, crossing his arms and glaring at the floor. It wasn’t like he hadn’t heard things like that before, that his ideas were stupid, pointless, useless-

“Howard,” Maria said warningly.

Sighing sharply, Howard added, “That said, I suppose there’s no reason to stick you there. I’m not going to be retiring for years yet, so we have time to figure out a feasible compromise. Until then, you can start building up the tech department. You had a point about SI being behind on that market. Show me what you can do there, and then maybe we can… reassess SI’s future directions.”

Tony stared at Howard, speechless.

He glanced at Maria, who smiled at him. It was a genuine smile, happy and a little sly.

“You… really?” Tony asked, voice small.

“I wouldn’t have said it if I didn’t mean it, Anthony,” Howard snapped.

Tony should have left it there. He really should have just accepted the sudden good fortune in that Howard was finally allowing him to do something besides weapons, giving him a change to show what they could really _do_ in other markets. If he could show the profits to be found in tech like phones and tablets and whatnot, perhaps he could move on to bigger things – medical advancements and the like.

Things that would truly save lives, not take them.

But Rhodey would be downstairs any minute now. And… well, it mattered.

So he took a deep breath and said, “I’m dating Rhodey, Dad.”

Howard froze, expression blank.

Tony’s mouth was dry, his throat itched with it, but he swallowed and kept going.

“I know… how you feel about that. You’ve always made it clear you don’t approve of anything except a straight relationship. But I love Rhodey, and I’m not going to stop just because you don’t like it or want me to.”

“You’ve dated women,” Howard said, almost like he was accusing Tony of something. Tricking him, maybe.

Tony shrugged. “I’m not picky about what gender I’m dating,” he said simply, sparing a glance for his mom. She gave him a tentative smile, but her eyes were worried, glancing between Howard and Tony.

Raising his chin, Tony focused on Howard again. “If this is going to be a… a problem? Don’t even bother bringing me back into SI.” His heart was pounding, he could feel it in the vein at the side of his neck and wondered if his parents could see it there, too.

Howard scowled once more, annoyed. “Look. I won’t say I like it. And I don’t, Anthony. I’m not comfortable with it, but I’ve ignored what I’ve seen so far. I’m… I suppose you’re old enough to make up your own mind about that kind of thing. I’m not going to tell you what to do with your personal life in that regard.”

It wasn’t ideal. Hell, Tony didn’t even think it was necessarily a good response. Clearly his dad disapproved, but… but he wasn’t going to do or say anything about it. (Or so he said; Tony would believe that when he had more evidence for it than Howard ignoring a few kisses a small handful of times.)

There was no more time to talk about it, though. Rhodey rounded the corner, raising his brows at the sight of Tony’s parents but otherwise saying nothing.

He did slide his hand to the small of Tony’s back, though.

“Ready to go?”

Tony nodded. He glanced at his parents, not sure what to say. After their conversation, any kind of goodbye felt awkward to Tony.

His mom stepped forward, brushing his hair back briefly. Her fingers were rough and cool. “Call me when you get there. So I know you’re safe.”

“Okay,” Tony agreed quietly.

“It was a pleasure to meet you, Rhodey,” she added, turning and holding out her hand to Rhodey. They shook, Rhodey giving her a slightly warmer smile than he had before. Tony looked between them suspiciously, but shrugged it off.

Rhodey did not say anything to Howard. Tony hesitated just long enough to give his dad a nod, and then the two of them were out the door and into the waiting car.

Tony thought about it as the car pulled out of the driveway.

“You heard all of that?”

“Most of it, I think,” Rhodey said, leaning back. His arm was stretched over the back of the seat. Tony shifted to lean against Rhodey’s side.

“It’s… an improvement,” he offered.

Rhodey snorted. “I still think your dad is a goddamn dick,” he said bluntly. “And your mom isn’t perfect either. But at least she obviously cares, and I guess maybe Howard is… trying,” he offered. He didn’t necessarily sound like he believed it.

Tony stretched up to kiss Rhodey’s cheek. “Thank you.”

A little smile played on Rhodey’s lips, but he didn’t say anything.

~*~*~

“Uncle Tony!” Lila screamed, rushing Tony as soon as he stepped into the living room. Ben was right behind her, both of them crashing into his legs, nearly toppling him over. He would have toppled if Rhodey hadn’t braced him with a hand on his back.

“Easy guys,” Rhodey warned. “Tony’s got some ouchies so you need to be careful.”

“Big ouchies?” Lila asked.

Tony hesitated, then nodded. She looked worried, and hugged him more carefully. Tony smiled softly and stroked her hair, the springy curls soft against his hand. “I’ll be okay,” he said.

Jeanie and Rhodey got them to let go a few minutes later. Jeanie kissed Tony’s cheek with tears in her eyes before taking them into the living room. Rhodey tilted his head towards the kitchen, then took Tony’s bag and walked upstairs.

Swallowing, Tony headed into the kitchen to face Roberta Rhodes.

She was there waiting for him at the table with a cup of coffee. He sat beside her quietly, gratefully wrapping his hands around the cup when she slid it to him. For a moment, neither of them said anything.

“I’m so glad you made it home,” she said eventually. “I’d hoped you would. Terrence was sure you would, said you would probably fight your way out if you had to.”

Tony smiled slightly and shrugged. “Mostly got lucky. But… he wasn’t that wrong, I suppose.” He took a quick gulp of coffee. Those memories were still too raw.

“I wasn’t sure we could expect you back here, though,” she said. It was casual enough that Tony would be able pass off an easy answer, but just pointed enough that it invited an explanation.

He smiled at her, letting how he felt – giddy and disbelieving and so happy – show. “Rhodey loves me,” he told her.

Her grin was warm and wide. “I know,” she said, sounding approving.

Unlike his own parents.

It was just what Tony needed, he thought. The hug she pulled him into after that was also exactly what he’d been needing. He sagged into it, sighing.

Roberta pressed a kiss to his temple, and Tony was reveling in the good, happy feelings this whole conversation gave him, when she whispered, “Terrence already knew, Tony.”

He pulled back, confused. “What?”

Her smile was fond. Which did not match with the panic her next words gave Tony. “That you and Jim weren’t really together. Terrence already knew.”

He gaped at her. Chuckling, she cupped his cheek. “Oh, honey, don’t look so striken. He was just happy that you two were friends again. And he had hope you’d figure it out this time, the both of you.” She focused over Tony’s shoulder, and he turned to see Rhodey standing there, looking a bit sheepish.

“ _You_ know?” Tony croaked.

Rhodey nodded and shrugged, coming to sit beside Tony. He grabbed his hand and brushed a kiss over the back of it. He did that a lot, Tony thought, and Tony really liked it.

“Dad told me that he knew – and after that, I talked to Mama about it and she told me that you’d confessed to her before leaving.” He shook his head, squeezing Tony’s hand and saying, “I’m not upset,” before Tony could begin to freak out about that.

“The only ones that don’t know, now, are just the kids,” Rhodey explained. He cleared his throat, looking sheepish again. “Jeanie threatened to kick my ass if I fucked things up with you a third time.”

Tony wasn’t sure if he wanted to laugh or protest.

“You want to come with me to see Dad today?” Rhodey asked. Vaguely, Tony was aware of Roberta getting up and leaving the kitchen. “We can tell him that we’re actually together now. That we might not be engaged, but… we’re in a serious relationship. That we’re happy. Mama said that’s all he’s ever wanted, for me to be happy.”

“And… you are? With me?” Tony asked, blushing because it was stupid and insecure to need to hear it, but… but he needed to.

“Happiest I’ve been in years,” Rhodey said, with a grin. “Even with all the awful shit that’s happened the past few months, I’m _so_ happy. Because of you. Even if we weren’t dating, I’d be happy just to be around you. I have told you before, Tony. You’re family and I love you. Just… I love you a little differently now.”

“I love you too,” Tony said. Because he didn’t get tired of being able to say that. Just like he didn’t get tired of hearing it from Rhodey, and knowing that now?

Now Rhodey loved him the same way.

He curled a hand around the back of Rhodey’s neck when Rhodey kissed him, Rhodey’s hand cupping his jaw. And that was nice, really nice, too.

“Ew!” Lila giggled.

Tony grinned as Jeanie appeared, scolding Lila for being rude.

Rhodey was watching them, shaking his head, and looked back at Tony with a raised brow.

“And you? Are you happy?”

“Deliriously.” Tony grinned wider and grabbed Rhodey’s face between his palms, pulling him in for another kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just want to thank you all for your awesome comments, and again thank those who helped me out with brainstorming for this fic. It's been really fun to work on for the past, oh, half a year or so. Thank you all for reading!


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